The North American box art for Persona 3 FES
The Japanese box art for Persona 3 FES
New Persona awarded from picking the right card in the mini game upon completion of battles
Some of Elizabeth's Requests
One of the many interactions in Persona 3: FES
Haruhi+Persona 3=Awesome!!!
Chagrall Cafe, located in Paulownia Mall. The player can buy coffee here that increases charm. Playe
The Antique Store, where you can trade in items like ruby, onyx, adamantine, etc. for fused weapons,
Main Character, Mitsuru, Yukari and Fuuka fan art
Known as "Nyx Avatar" in Persona 3, as the final boss.
Akihiko: Hey! Knock it off, will ya!?!?
Orpheus, on the top floor of the SEES dorm
Chatting with a Social Link (Hermit Arcana)
Port Island alley during Dark Hour.
Port Island central complex
Elizabeth is also an optional (but adorable) super-boss in P3.
You never actually get a Valentine's Day event in P3, so this is wishful thinking.
Mitsuru Kirijo. Her fighting style is more "Raphael" than "Amy".
Official Persona 3 Headphones by Audio-Technica. (Model: ATH-EM700 SV)
All I need to summarize this game.
"Almost as though you were trying to dodge law enforcement."
"Before that, people would just look at their fingers and cry."
Brooklyn knows how to appreciate sexy manliness.
"Despite the fact that we've only just met."
Get your groove on, Velvet Girl.
"How DARE you wear that skirt as part of your mandatory school uniform!"
I knew that Pimsleur was bad, but wow.
I should start describing masturbation like that.
I thought you'd never ask.
"MY STOOL IS GONNA BE SO FUCKING SOFT, BRO!"
Nobody's starting at you.
"That's when I hit him with some Bufu."
The existential crisis of Bugs Bunny.
This door is a mixture of languages!
Those eyebrows say no, but the cutscene that follows says yes.
We've been over this, Junpei: they're black people.
Giving you the energy to execute Nodion lords.
HOW IS THAT EVEN FUCKING POSSIBLE!?
How much longer til the school explodes?
I swim like a motherfucking shark.
Just as Nisemonogatari is the end of Japanese literature.
NOTHING ABOUT THIS IS RIGHT!
Only Junpei would be dumb enough to buy a PSP Go.
She may or may not be a rabbit.
Somehow, this is an improvement.
The joke is that Atlus hasn't made any arcade games to use as an Easter egg for this scene.
To everybody complaining about the animation quality in the Persona 4 anime.
What happens when I enter a thread.
Who wouldn't be happy to see Brooklyn like this?
Apparently, Akihiko's the sexy one.
"Because this is 'MRIKA!"
Bitches love book covers.
But that's why I had to leave the fourth town.
"I'm gonna show Nanako who's fucking boss."
INTO THE DARKNESS OF THE VOID!
Katawa Shoujo wasn't this goddamn creepy.
LOOK AT ME! I AM DANCING!
Not something to do in Igor's presence.
Speaking of reaction shots...
This doesn't get any better.
To everybody complaining about sexism in Persona 4 Golden.
We get extra credit for killing dissidents.
What you think summarizes me.
Would you like to spend the rest of the night strung out of your mind?
Yea, that's great. What are your grades, again?
Yukari is now my favorite character.
Always cite your sources.
English: the language we are clearly speaking.
How'd she get ahold of my Innocent Sin review?
"I THOUGHT THIS WOULD PUT YOU AT EASE."
I'll never get tired of this.
I'm gonna Photoshop Kenji's face onto Kenji.
Says the SHORT haired housewife.
That's Atlus's way of saying that this doesn't take place in the Persona 2 universe.
"Then you'd best upgrade."
This really explains itself, doesn't it?
Because I can't tell you how many times I've been shot cooking bacon.
Bring the graphs and I'm good to go.
Given her outfit, this worries me.
I catch your hints. *puff puff*
I'm Photoshopping Morooka in.
IS EVERYBODY IN THIS GAME A FUCKING PSYCHOPATH!?
Maybe he doesn't get it....
That's comforting to know.
That's just how Kenji rolls.
That's probably the name of an actual anime.
The day when I come to visit.
"Were you even listening?"
A strange, watered-down combination of Kefka Palazzo and Ed Hardy.
And for whatever reason, I signed it without question.
Brooklyn always got the answer.
COMMU Rank? Also, everything else wrong with this.
Fencers were fucking badass.
I suspect this will always be the first post on my blogs.
It's a role-playing game, guys.
THAT is the power of Persona.
These are arcade games, not games that you play on a console or anything.
This name is paying for itself.
USE THE SHIT OUT OF THIS.
Wait, I think AndrewB already has this in HIS gallery.
He IS an uncanny fellow....
I'm gonna use this one a lot.
Is there even a correlation?
Of the planet Omic-oh, it says Moon.
Something doesn't feel right here.
THEY STEAL YOUR LIFE ESSENCE, MAN!
This is gonna bite me in the ass, isn't it?
WATCH OUT FOR THE KNIFE!!!
What do you have against video games?
What's scarier: this or anything Igor says?
You ARE a mysterious incident.
I THOUGHT THERE WERE NO WITNESSES!
Oh shit. We have an even worse Teddie, guys.
That'll get those feminists!
The Brozne Age, the Iron Age, the Katana Age.
This sign will be in English, and this sign will be in Japanese.
Turns out this was the correct answer.
Use this at your discretion.
Well, you don't have time to explain.
What a coincidence...is what I planned to type before they actually ended up in the same class.
Who eats a burger without octopus these days?
WHO RUNS WITH THEIR HANDS IN THEIR POCKETS LIKE THAT!?
Why didn't I name my character Brooklyn Rage?
You're going to be a bad guy. I can feel it.
And that wraps up this part of Renegade Ego. Here's some Vocaloid bullshit.
Did you have to put it like that?
I honestly wouldn't mind drinking that.
About as close as I could get.
He's definitely gonna be a villain by the end of this.
It's friendship, isn't it?
Not the player I was imagining.
Open your eyes. I don't want to know what you're imagining right now.
Soggy with the blood of that blinking monstrosity in the back.
This is where I'd make a Battlestar Galactica joke if I'd ever watched Battlestar Galactica.
What are those afroed things?
What were YOU thinking with Stupei?
When did this become Magical Diary?
WHY WOULD YOU FUCKING DO THIS!?
"All male, if you catch my drift."
And he's looking right at you.
"Hope you don't mind if I call you at midnight. You weren't sleeping or anything, right?"
How did Yosuke get such a deep tan?
How much longer is she gonna pull this shit?
I better not find a stockpile of dead cats like I did in BioShock.
There's no such thing as a four way.
THEY ARE JUST KOREANS, JUNPEI.
"TV easily impresses me."
Watch out for those feminists?
WHAT DO THOSE ELLIPSES MEAN!?
WHEN THE HELL DID THIS BECOME MAGICAL DIARY!?
"Who has two thumbs and can't report the news worth a damn?"
With my patented two-finger approach.
You are SO gonna get a face full of shouting flower child.
A more apt name would be "Villain Ripped Straight from the Pages of Naruto".
ALWAYS fear, Junpei's here.
And then comes the comedy album.
Another one of those pictures you'll probably use in relation to my blogs.
At least he's honest about it.
Holy shit. I CAN PREDICT THE FUTURE!
"I don't like those pouty eyes, or those full, inviting lips, pretty boy."
I'm making her my girlfriend just to prove her wrong.
It's not my fault I'm so irresistibly sexy.
Not that she committed suicide, but that they'd get in trouble.
She watched Darkwing Duck instead of Rescue Rangers.
Speaking of masturbation...
STOP GIVING ME PHOTOSHOP IDEAS, VIDEO GAMES!
The joke is that I haven't visited the old couple in forever.
The kid with Stock Anime Catchphrase Tourette's?
What's Yukiko doing in the lower right?
"You're wearing a short sleeve shirt."
And so do Snow Queen whatevers.
"But I am closing my eyes, for some reason."
"Dat's why I talk like dis."
Except for the first time we ever met.
I keep telling you, I don't know what they're planning against Shin-Ra!
IS EVREYBODY IN THIS GAME A FUCKING RACIST!?
Man, I'm really blurring the lines between Persona and Katawa Shoujo.
Maybe because it's the first time anything happened?
"My eyes are up here, damn it."
OK, seriously, fucking stop it with the Stupei thing.
She was so ill she didn't need to go to school.
She's talking about a sword.
She's the only girl there, apparently.
Yea, is that Math King or Mahjong?
And then I didn't visit her for a month.
I'm about a week late with this, aren't I?
"I'm teaching you how to be forward."
Not much of an improvement.
Not the coolest sounding thing to say.
"That would have been insane."
"That's not where I was looking."
This is the best answer, strangely enough.
We're not actually boxing.
Why didn't I ask this any of the other times I met him?
You know what you did wrong this time, Junpei.
"YOU'LL GET SO TWEAKED, MAN!"
Am I gonna fuck his wife?
And then she breaks out the Bible.
Because you know your way around cough medicine.
"Can we have one discussion that doesn't end with masturbation?"
I don't even want to know what his wife does that makes my rage acceptable.
I don't give Igor enough credit.
"I'm more into you IF YOU CATCH MY DRIFT."
NOW WHY DOES THIS LOOK FAMILIAR HINT HINT?
Only one thing on Brookyln's mind, and it's never legal.
Somebody confirm that this is a feature of Japanese dolls.
This is why you don't drink during the Dark Hour.
Well, actually, there is.
You know he's a creep because he's watched more than one anime.
You'll end up a loser regardless.
A world of psychotic pun masters.
As opposed to an old moon bonus?
As opposed to painting the world with sound?
Brooklyn sure is pleased by this.
Fragile Dreams: The Movie.
How many people has Teddie contacted?
I don't think you know how the Dark Hour works.
"I don't need you there, anyway."
I'm using this in response to about half the Social Links.
Is this a translation thing, or just a stupid joke?
Let's just ignore the context.
Must...resist....the obvious....
THIS IS ANOTHER PUN. I REPEAT: THIS IS ANOTHER PUN.
YOUR DEADLY, GHOULISH FIGURE IS JUST WHAT THIS LITTLE GIRL LIKES.
And then his arm breaks in half the first time he uses Persona.
Even though she's already getting married I KNOW YOUR FUCKING PLOT TWISTS, GAME!
"Excuse me, which way is the anime convention?"
Hideo Kojima strikes again.
I actually remember the context, and this still doesn't make a lot of sense.
Is that your way of saying that I'm inevitably gonna fuck up this Social Link?
No, you still look like an idiot.
Play me some Where is Here I am Forest.
She's using the radio to mask her idiocy. Poorly.
Somebody has to be sorry for this.
That dog can really pound 'em down.
"The dumbest goddamn thing I've ever seen."
"You must be put to death for such a lame fucking room."
"And get on your knees. Doctor Keisuke has a case of blue balls."
And just like that, I decided to drop all connections with his sorry ass.
Elizabeth knows how to party.
FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, I HOPE I DON'T HAVE TO USE THIS.
I think they'll find out when you come to the playground at the shrine every fucking day.
It's just GIFs of Sonic the Hedgehog.
Somehow, this applies to me.
The Nietzsche is strong with this one.
The picture she projects into your mind.
THE woman. We're all in agreement on who THE woman is.
There's no way Dan is sexier than Brooklyn.
THIS BOW LEAVES ME SEXUALLY CHARGED!
WHAT IS THIS BULLSHIT, ATLUS?
What is this fucking shit?
Which I have to imagine would kill them.
WHY DOES THIS SEEM FAMILIAR!?
Yet another reaction shot.
A Persona 4 Golden opportunity?
Always distracting them with the sexy.
"Let me help you in the very next screenshot."
"That's a reasonable thing to ask over the Internet, right?"
Senior Skip Day. Look it up.
The fuck does that even mean?
This is where your tax dollars are going.
What's that smell? It's not your ordinary smell.
When the hell did this become To Aru Majutsu no Index?
"Who do I have to slap around here to get some good booze?"
You DO know what spunk is, right?
You know, most girls don't tell people about their menstrual cycles.
"And they died that very night."
Aren't you the planning type of guy?
As opposed to artificial magic?
He's already sitting....I think.
I get all the exercise I need.
I'd post this if I was the type to post my bitching.
This senryu doesn't translate (and yes, it is a senryu, he explicitly says as much).
Wait, don't I have a younger brother?
"You said you couldn't eat."
"And if I were your son, nobody would find your body."
"And that concludes today's Japanese lessons."
And this commemorates red lettering.
For not noticing the incredibly obvious.
"He was telling me about this anime he saw."
I'm just as confused as you are.
It's like I'm looking in a mirror that reflects sound instead of light.
I've gotta introduce her to Mitsuru.
Not good enough for the actual WHO, I take it.
Not with that plaid shirt.
That he had an army of Welsh Corgies. That he could get totally wasted on a thimble of corn oil.
The Lonely Road of Love: coming to theaters this fall.
This guy knows what he's talking about.
Wait, I think Pepsiman has this in her gallery.
"We're getting married at two different places, apparently."
"You're not giving me Apathy Syndrome, old man."
And you didn't tell her parents about her plans to run away from home.
I have narrowly avoided a Norman Bates travesty.
"I mean, you know how to leave town fast, don't you?"
I'm not even sure if this is racist.
I'm so sorry. Let's just hope you can still have children.
Kill them all, hide the bodies.
Oh, this is definitely racist.
She knows what you've done.
The hell are you doing here?
The lack of reflection is a plot point; the blood really isn't.
"The police will never catch you!"
They wouldn't understand your...tastes...
What did that old man put in my drink?!
Yes, I imagine experience would be pretty helpful.
YOU'RE MESSING WITH THE WRONG DUDE, ONO.
"You're right here. You can just talk to us."
And this is where Edge of Madness starts playing.
And yes, he IS referring to the mouse.
Because old men in night clubs are just the people to trust with sexual advice.
"How's death comparing me to a druggie?"
I don't know. Ask Mitsuru.
I think it just wants a hug.
I'm simply imagining deadly grammar shurikens.
It's all of us, isn't it?
I've just now noticed that there's a dog sniffing his ass.
More for the anti-P4A people.
"Seas and mountains! There's literally nothing else in the world."
The same with regular hair, too.
This conversation makes no goddamn sense in the original Japanese.
WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS SHIT!?
"Where's the nearest bathroom?"
"About all these flowers you seem to have."
And now I want to blend this with Katawa Shoujo.
"And while you're in the area, could you take out the eye of Sauron?"
"Are you remembering to control your completely-out-of-your-control emotional states?"
Can we go five minutes without a fucking pun?
Can't beat Max Power shoes.
"Even though I'm more equipped to do so."
Funky Student doesn't attend Gekkoukan.
I feel like he's talking to ME directly.
The green incident, not the red incident.
THE POWER OF REACTION SHOTS!
Why are your posters so damn blurry?
Yea, that's about what I'd do.
You have no idea what college is actually like, do you?
"And that's why I wake up with wet sheets."
Another screenshot I'll never use in reference to myself.
"I should probably phrase that less awkwardly."
If I had a penny for every time I've heard that...
It involves whips, doesn't it?
"Japan: that place we're clearly not in."
"Just slip her a Mutatsu-Edokawa Special..."
Man, people in Japan don't handle bad grades well.
"Oh, hello there. I was just hanging out exactly 500 feet away from the schoolgrounds."
"Same as mine, now that I think about it." (I CAN PREDICT ALL YOUR PLOT TWISTS.)
"The day when my skin texture glitched the fuck out."
Then why even have dorms for elementary school students?
There's something really skeevy about this.
"Wait, I thought it was my mother I wasn't on good terms with."
Clearly, she has read my blogs.
Does anybody know what this is referring to?
I could probably turn this into an entire blog.
I don't think Persona 2 had that spell.
I have to admit, he DOES look impressive.
I'm gonna have to Photoshop Nietzsche's mustache into this, aren't I?
Junpei's nightmare: mediocre TV.
Just the place for a Hiimdaisy reference.
Prepare to swim in Morooka puke.
So THAT'S what a Hierophant is.
The best emoticon in existence.
The Moon grants him the power of -ash.
This isn't Persona 2 anymore.
What the hell's Akihiko doing in that outfit?
"Also, this girl who grew a ton of moles."
"And that makes me happy, for some reason."
I like to imagine a giant hole in the wall.
"I even stole your phone and set it as your ringtone."
It's like looking in a mirror that actually reflects light this time. I don't look in mirrors.
Nietzsche Nietzsche Nietzsche.
OH DEAR GOD, WHERE ARE HIS PANTS!?
The closest option I had to yes.
THE POWER OF REACTION SHOTS!
"THESE ARE THE ONLY OPTIONS I CAN EVER THINK OF."
Violence would have been a good option.
We already have a character for that.
What are you thinking about so hard?.....Actually, don't tell me.
Why is it you always feel this way?
Why'd you have to spoil it with speak of Stupei?
Curiously enough, Yu said the same thing that Christmas night with Naoto.
"Do you know who you're messing with?"
GEE, I WONDER WHO IT COULD BE.
"I always thought it was the other way around!"
It totally works, because of course it does.
It was not-love at first sight.
So where are the older women?
Somebody tell Aigis about the birds and non-receptive bees.
The girl on the left, at least; the one on the right looks about thirteen.
"THE JOY OF TEENAGERS PISSES ME OFF TO NO END!"
This is where I'd make a Chobits joke if I didn't have a shred of dignity.
"You are my number one friend. My best friend. M-wait, aren't I voiced by Karen Stassman?"
"You get her from behind, and I'll push."
YOU KNOW WHAT MUST BE DONE. LEAVE NO WITNESSES.
You're in a straight line.
All in the same area, presumably.
Always go for the philosophical answer.
But you messed up your back pretty bad the last time you tried that.
"Do you understand what it mean to 'be needlessly patronizing', Fuuka?"
"I know. Brooklyn taught me all about it."
"I mean, I don't have many secondary sex characteristics, so it's hard to classify me as anything."
I'm about to max it, anyway, so who gives a shit?
"Just look at it, being all tower-y. The smug bastard."
Maybe buy her some clothes or a scarf or something.
Maybe it's because you have the eyes of beetles and geckos?
Nobody's looking at you, you egomaniac.
She dies two seconds later.
The game still refers to him as Pale Young Man, for some reason.
"We're wearing the same school uniform."
"Where's your snooze button?"
Will totally fail because you've been standing in front of the window this entire time.
You didn't have any problems hitting on her yesterday.
Watch it all go up in flames.
"All those people who said I wasn't fooling anybody with my toupee are going to PAY, damn it!"
"Fuck you and the $400 you blew on me."
He's speaking for "himself".
He's talking about a ten year old child.
I like to imagine a physical monster with tentacles and shit.
"I'm more into the androgynous charms of Aigis."
"I'm with Brooklyn: it's best not to get involved."
"In retrospect, that was a horrible design choice."
Perfect for the budding foot fetishist in you.
That makes very little sense.
The ladies just can't resist Brooklyn.
WHAT AN AWESOME RUN ANIMATION!
With a name like Orgia Mode, of course!
She just can't get enough Brooklyn.
"Don't worry. I speak dog."
Even Mitsuru's uncomfortable around this.
He spent the rest of his life a eunuch.
He's like the dad I never wanted in the first place.
I don't think there are any vets open during the DARK HOUR.
"I prefer the weight of a knife."
I'm making jokes about a high school girl masturbating. What's happened to my life?
Is Aigis planning something?
It's because it houses the lint of ages unknown, isn't it?
Let's all be thankful for the angle.
Since when could she even translate languages?
"That'll just remind 'em who's boss."
That's what you interrupt the conversation for?
Turns out I fucked up the pronunciation.
"You can't tell me what to do!"
You're gonna have to leave town again.
Reaction shot #waytoofuckingmany.
"But enough about my breasts."
Did he bump into me in the bathroom?
I imagine all of you in the thread do.
"I won't make the same mistake twice."
It took me a bit to realize that this was just for the beach outfits from before.
Just another day for Brooklyn Rage.
Something that does not need stating in motion.
That's a methhead if I've ever seen one.
"They discovered I was hanging out with you."
This week on Renegade Ego.
"What I'm about to do to both of you in this secluded area."
Your Social Link increases.
"And somehow, you know my name."
Apparently, this is enthusiasm.
Budding Rapist Starter Pack.
But he's lying on his side.
But they're not separated...
But you'll just have to accept the reality of biracial romance.
"For the sake of the other girls you've brought in my party."
I'm guessing it's Chariot.
I'm imagining surgery to make somebody look like Kano.
"It's DEFINITELY your fault."
It's like you can read my mind.
It's worse than you could possibly imagine.
Look at that scared face. That is truly the face of fear.
Tanaka wants to see us naked.
This comes out of fucking nowhere.
Those 5 cards fucking suck, by the way.
You don't know what you're dealing with. DO NOT EAT THE MEAT OF PARTS UNKNOWN!
"Don't listen to a damn thing your parents or teachers say. I'm the only one you can trust."
Take a shot for every reaction shot I take.
She's progressing faster than I could have possibly imagined.
But your heart belongs to another.
"You know I've wished for worse."
"I push the knife slowly into them."
I was going to comment on how he's not actually resting, but I'm now more curious about the sink.
She has many, apparently.
"You think. How can you tell? It's a fucking MMO."
She's seeming more and more like Sweep.
Somebody's going to tell themselves not to run away at some point, aren't they?
"I don't think I should translate this. Something about the Jews."
Really? THAT'S what sticks out to you?
"Because we can't always blow his brains out."
"Unfortunately, tone does not translate."
When did I become a valley girl?
Because otherwise, he'd be completely defenseless.
Turns out she WAS able to do that.
"I saw what you were doing with Aigis. Count me out!"
What's weirder: the Sexy part or the Dance part?
Did her designers even care?
Because it's totally normal for dogs to wear clothes.
He ripped them straight from the bloody back of his master's angel.
LET THE LEGION'S SEXY DANCE PLEASE YOU! ARE MY GYRATIONS TURNING YOU ON!? IS THIS GETTING YOU HOT!?
Good thing Aigis isn't alive to translate such vile hate speech.
Where the Wild Things are About to Die.
YOU ARE A DUMB LOOKING persona.
Uh, excuse me, could you dance in literally any other part of the level?
No, it's totally natural for people not to have heads.
Even in motion, he isn't.
How about you analyze your conjugations and tenses first?
Because even Tanaka knows that you can't eat vegan food on its own.
"And in those Sin My Gummy Sensei games you kids are playing these days."
For reasons absolutely nobody understands.
You mean "lazily", right?
"I am being informed that the writers are being too transparent with the plot."
"The secret ingredient is Illegal."
The ultimate proof that magic is just making shit up as you go.
Because that's worked out SOOO well for people in the past.
"Man, I really should have paid attention to that Temurah lecture."
His time with Maya is giving Brooklyn some ideas.
Again, I hope I don't have to use this.
Collapsing the Japanese economy is one of Brooklyn's turn-ons.
"Now where do I put my mouth?"
I was going to point out Elizabeth's latent racism, but she was doomed from the start.
"Maybe I shouldn't have cut the cocaine with more cocaine."
Elizabeth Adventure 2 Battle.
"THIS WILL BE YOUR GRAVE."
Nobody tell her it's a bike rack.
Too bad we had to censor all of it.
The next time I saw Elizabeth, she had a huge purple bruise right side of her face.
What are you saying about me?
"Why the police would bring a blind man to a lineup is an entirely different discussion."
Correction: a world of psychotic, racist, NAIVE pun masters.
Where is this coming from?
No, seriously, what is he talking about?
Because normally, elementary school children aren't so gullible.
SOMEBODY GET THIS KID A MICROPHONE.
He has "sexiest baby in the maternity ward" written on his birth certificate.
Kurosawa pulled some strings to get you off scott free, but he's not willing to do that again.
Again, I'd post this if I were the type of person to post their bitching on the Internet.
"but enuf about kenji & that completely predictable plot twist"
Brooklyn's thinking of learning a thing or two from this mystery teacher.
Is she suggesting I give her an intimate tongue massage?
Takenozuka doesn't hook up with unscientific girls.
"Do you know how big a pain in the ass necromancy is?!"
The Thing? You mean The Thing?
Now why does this joke sound familiar...
Still better than fast forward.
All this talk about diarrhea and cults is freaking you the eff out.
Don't say that. Don't you EVER say that!
It's like he knows I'm watching him.
"Our first date is at a GameStop? What a cheap piece of shit."
Chie has every right to reject you.
I don't think that's what the term even remotely suggests.
So the samurai were basically fancy barbers?
STAB HER IN HER RELIGIOUS FACE.
Presumably on their dates at the beach.
"WHY ARE THERE SO MANY TENTACLES!?"
Somehow, this is more unsettling than watching Fuuka jerk it last week.
Kind of? There's not a lot of ambiguity to it, is there?
Breaking the rules to give advice on what colleges to research.
I'd tell you to take a drink for every woman Brooklyn wins over, but I feel like you're drunk.
No, you seem to have it down.
Listen, man. I don't have the money now, but I'll pay you double next week. Just don't break my arm!
He's more annoyed with the name than with the hangover.
"What benefit this has, we have not figured out."
Native Americans, Junpei.
Oh, shit. The one time he actually WAS being even remotely racist.
"Money doesn't run away with other men LIKE HE DID."
OK, what about Brooklyn looks even remotely innocent?
Fortunately, he doesn't see you dialing 911 in your pocket.
You want me to spot you the money, don't you?
"Yea, you! How do you think it feels to have a ten year old talk down to you!?"
"You talking about that kid up there?" "You know I am."
So THAT'S how she lost her hand!
One more pun or robot comment could set her over the edge.
Let it be known that I immediately tried the shit out of this.
This bitch likes to be wined and dined before a movie.
"I'm the sex side, you're the arson side. Remember that and we won't have any problems."
"Abusing you just isn't as fun as it used to be."
"Come back in six, seven years, when you're legal."
You have trouble deciding which part of the screen to blow up first.
Somehow, that makes them cyber.
And there's the fact that this is the exact reason why nobody sees Tanaka during the day.
THIS CANINE'S BUTTHOLE IS IN EXTREME DANGER! SOMEBODY CALL A VET!
She is still far from passing as human...
We're doing this shit, man.
It just gets better and better.
Ain't nothing gonna stop us! THE MORE THAN DREAMIN!
The jig was up the moment you realized nobody has bothered to house-train poor Koromaru.
"Look, I told you before we left that theaters don't allow dogs inside."
You spend the rest of the night downloading the movie off Bittorrent and burning him said DVD.
OK, has any MMO company ever said this with a straight face ever?
Funny how you spell perfectly when referring to your actions.
Even though they can probably access that already?
The dumb smile completes the image for me.
"It will engulf the land, and you shall be our leader."
Psychic ninjas? Oh hell yes.
You can never afford to be behind on ninja data.
There's no arguing with that.
Yes, Aigis. The Internet killed the ninjas............I hate to admit how right you are about that.
Aigis, you sarcastic ass.
"But haven't we met him before?" "He's been living here for about a month." "Shut up."
"We don't need to go over this again. He gave his legal consent to this. You're all witnesses."
"Junpei, he's over there." "........."
"I tried telling that to the judge, but I still had to serve that time."
Presumably dangling from the ceiling.
"SHE SAID SHE WAS ON THE PILL!"
OK, it KINDA makes sense that you'd be racist, old man. KINDA.
What the hell are holey socks?
"You know I'm not. I never am and never will be." "Good."
What's more unsettling: the spike or her correctness?
Junpei: never seen a naked lady.
What the hell kind of MMO is this!?
Somehow. It's surprising that this feature was even included.
The right kind of person.
What's dried up? The flower sprite that isn't in the vase?
These emoticons just get better and better.
Fuck it. We're maxing this shit.
Funny. That's not what I learned from him.
Have we been playing MineCraft this entire time?
I should start using that word. You know the one.
"Geez, how many deaf jokes can one guy make?"
That's not how you greet people.
Apparently, this is playing.
Then she doesn't seem sad, does she?
What a strange thing for a six year old to ask.
"YOUR PARENTS DO NOT LOVE YOU AND NO ONE EVER WILL."
She knows full well what she gave you.
"That's not the message I got from it."
So we WERE dating Maiko this entire time?
You ran away quickly because child services are hot on your trail.
Why not just skip a couple of grades? What's the worst that could happen?
Akihiko's into some weird shit.
"Oh, that Koromaru!" [AUDIENCE LAUGHTER]
I don't think that's the word you want.
About what, you don't want to know.
The answer to life's most important questions.
I guess this sounds like me?
"The cops won't believe a thing you say."
"You hear that, Maiko? He's MY man!"
"Where do babies come from?"
"You kinda just get lost in the moment. You know what I mean?"
"That your room smells like kerosene. Were you planning on mixing me a drink? You're so thoughtful."
I'm now having a hard time deciding whether Junpei or Yukari's the worse character.
Reaction shot #42394230582323508235235023940482....
"Probably because of this giant, bloodless spike piercing my brain."
I don't think anybody did.
"You can read all about it in my manifesto."
Don't make that face EVER AGAIN.
"You. Me. That fire extinguisher. Let's do it."
The teachers have theme songs? Why didn't I go to this school?
Which teacher is this and why aren't I in their class?
"Modern" language" You mean she was speaking like a samurai up until this point?
I think somebody was just fucking with you.
Which mood? There are a billion moods that could apply here.
"Even though you're very clearly tied up against your will."
"Yes, Junpei. I'm Mexican. What of it?"
The judgmental disapproval of Chidori.
Were you even listening, Ken?
"PUT IT ON. IT SHALL PLEASE ME."
I don't think that's the odd part about this.
Because this is 100% possible in Persona 3.
"Damn it, Fuuka! You said this make up would match my skin tone!"
You mean the Greek figure who murdered her children and rode away on a magic dragon?
"I use a generic personal pronoun, and he accuses me of racism. Real fucking funny."
"No, this is an actual gun. GET DOWN ON YOUR KNEES, BITCHES!"
"........Maybe we should leave them be."
Just look at all the emotional instability just oozing off her.
That way, they won't have to give her a new portrait.
"I love you. Here is a watch to commemorate that love."
Yes.....that's the reason.
PERSONAPERSONAPERSONAPERSONA.
"Look at that guy! He got an egg in the middle of his beef bowl. He's the shit!"
Less Bikini Party Summer and more Friday the 13th.
Japan: where Pokemon is a subject of small talk.
I bought a movie theater just for this thread. Appreciate that.
Does the narrator want to fuck us? Because I'm game.
Who did you think it was? (Answer: his dead son.)
Because hair is always a deal breaker for old Buddhist monks.
Just in case you doubted that this is a Persona game.
Like, together? This is what happens when there's only one cop in the world.
You were never seen again. Try again?
"How much money do you ha-never mind. Just steal that bike and ride as far as your little legs will-
I'm gonna have to Photoshop Muscle Man's face onto yours at some point, aren't I?
"Specifically, that guy on the bench over there. STOP FUCKING MY MOM, OLD MAN!"
It was here that I noticed THIS BED IS FUCKING ENORMOUS.
Chidori will never approve of your bullshit.
It's like Rin Tezuka grew hair and arms.
It's like they wrote it specifically to look like a translation error.
"The guidance councilor is gonna have a word with you about respecting people's kneecaps."
Junpei's gonna be feeding her oranges by the end of this, isn't he?
"Get your hand off my thigh before I call the cops"?
"What happened to the days when you could give a kid an ice cream cone without all these looks?"
You know what? I think I'm moving back to my earlier Hanako conjectures.
This dog wants to fucking party.
It was over before it even began.
I'd ask how that makes sense, but this IS the series where you can just trade Personae around.
"What parts of a dog are and aren't safe to eat. Which city has the least violent homeless."
"Remember: you'll only have an hour before the doc wakes up. Make sure nobody else sees you."
"No. I barely know who you are. Plus you've been lying to me since we first met."
Is this going to be a thing between them? I feel like it's going to be a thing between them.
"People talking, having friendly conversation? What sorcery is this!?"
"The orphanage. The therapy. The unbelievably creepy dolls on her shelf."
"Why not?" "No, seriously, why the drugs?"
What's stranger: light that emits temperature, or the fact that this is the Black Knight's blade?
Let's implicate the shit out of Shinjiro!
Because there's nothing sneakier than a fucking claymore.
That will soon be replaced by the pungent odor of foot.
Fragile Dreams + Katawa Shoujo = Persona 3.
"Blurry and motionless. I think I have glaucoma."
"Look at me! I'm doing it like my Persona!" "Good job, Koromaru! Who's a good boy?"
"Is this bringing back any memories, Yukari? Of loooooove?"
Why do you have to say it like that?.....Wait, HOW do you say it like that?
He's not talking about magic; he's just gonna discuss history in the sappiest way imaginable.
Isn't the Bible already a bible of magic?
"Pineapple! 47! Hunter Thompson!" "Stop trying to break my concentration!"
It's just pictures of him topless.
"In your gut. Now hand it all over."
"And tell him he's off the team. CUT THE DEAD WEIGHT."
You know, Kazushi, when people say they have a third leg, they don't mean a literal leg.
Yukari just felt a chill go down her spine, and she doesn't know why.
"They figured out who's been unplugging patients."
Death is your punishment for slacking off. Welcome to Japan, motherfucker.
"Uh, Chidori, have you been taking the medicine the doctors have been giving you." "No. Why?" "...."
See that, Aigis? SHE can pass as human.
"Knives as far as the eye could see..."
(Wait, why is her dialgoue in parentheses? Can Brooklyn read minds?)
Well....yea. That's kind of how dreams work.
Maiko isn't going to take this too well.
For whatever reason, she's very pleased with the abrupt finger-blasting you're giving her in public.
You're gonna have to be more specific than that.
enthusiasm, will you ever find the man of your dreams?
But he can't deny what you've said.
"The police wouldn't suspect a thing!" "Brilliant!"
"No, I'll just stick to hanging out with teenage boys late at night, when there's nobody around."
"Why are you calling me? We live in the same building." "..............."
"I haven't seen her in a while, and neither of us have been able to find good ticket prices."
How does he reach that alarm clock? Wouldn't that be awkward as hell?
"Forever and ever and ever."
"Make your friends green with envy when you show them your devotion to Christ!"
$100 for a health supplement? Jesus!
Maybe you two should sit somewhere else.
"I'm slowly transforming into a frog, damn it. How could you possibly understand that!?"
Well, that's the end of that Social Link.
So you want to be a dog now? What the hell is your character, again?
Where's he find the time between robot fights and Resident Evil?
Which would make him just as scary.
Are you sick? Why'd you put it like that?
"He says he has no idea how a magazine lazily plastered on his face would have fooled us."
Notice how Fuuka's the only one who's surprised.
"Why does he think that's how you're supposed to read it?"
He sounds exactly like Solid Snake on this line, despite not being voiced by David Hayter.
Where's the security camera that was filming all this?
"How?" ".........I don't know."
How would you even enact something like that without going to war?
"No. Slowly. I want to savor this."
But he's not wearing pants.
"Our friendship is worth about $3-10."
There's nothing luckier than something you use in a severe accident, right?
"I'm pregnant, and YOU'RE the father!"
"...I was severely confused. Shouldn't he have been grilling me?"
Coming to theaters this summer: the haunting tale of one girl's hatred for Stupei Supreme.
Perfect for someone like Brooklyn Rage.
I see no harm in giving this to Ken.
Since when would these make you less likely to trip?
Killing people with the power of French theater.
ROBOTS DO NOT GET TIRED. WHY ARE YOU TIRED?
Ever since you started hanging out with Yuko, she's been meddling in all your other Social Links.
What astute powers of observation.
Bunkichi doesn't hide his porn well, does he?
"Believe me, it's not the first."
Wait, $60 for a fucking manga?
He's taught you well, Chihiro.
"Just dump 'em off the pier. Nobody will ever know."
Brooklyn's greatest weakness: illiteracy.
"That's not worrying, right?"
All of them immediately off screen.
Turns out she didn't enjoy the grope fest a second time.
"But when you two finally do get it on, can you let me watch?"
"Sucking her dick, right?" "Not even close."
I've got it all on tape, you sick fuck.
"They could have given me a T-shirt, at the very least."
"That's the same thing I told Ken b-" "GO BACK HOME, KID. GOD!"
"What? Why? What's the connection?" "I have no goddamn clue!"
Oh, all the ways I can use this out of context. (There aren't a lot.)
So does the female student with a thing for Mitsuru. She's looking for thrills wherever.
"Still, a maid costume is p-" "It's Yukari." "Damn it."
"This projector holds the answers to all life's greatest questions."
"HAAAHAHAHAHAAHAHA." "That's not the joke. That's not even A joke."
The critics, on the other hand, weren't so kind regarding The Looney Tunes Show.
I'd tell him to call the Joker, but that's the wrong Social Link. Also, wrong game.
"Well, could you at least wash it off after you're done? Other people have to use it, you know."
Maybe you should have changed your clothes after your last arson spree.
Rhode Island will disappoint.
You don't have to tell Brooklyn.
"Why do you I think I stole it in the first place?"
"But with today's medical technology, nobody has to know about it."
"Since they're dead, it wasn't a very hard task."
What do you expect? That's how the world works.
"Who cares about restraining orders and witness protection? I'm going to find them, no matter what!"
Will the game ever back up what it says?
The strangest dick joke ever to grace the halls of Internet humor.
No survivors. Never any survivors.
"I keep telling you we're just friends."
Well, you got it from him, right?
Don't worry, Fuuka. I think we all forgot about Ken long before this.
Wait, I thought he was a dude.
Like, getting to his room?
"In this lone room, with no witnesses."
"You slept for three days straight for reasons that were never clearly explained."
Actually, it looks like the whole city is now underwater.
Does Japan have a different definition of day?
It's like he's goading me on.
I'm well aware that Kazushi's pregnant.
"And I will be the catalyst."
Why he's doing the chicken dance, exactly, isn't very clear.
Believe me, finding that Christmas star was a pain in the ass.
Looks like you're out a free burger.
"What admirers? It's just me and Chihiro."
What's worse: the second degree burns or the lukewarm lint?
And Brooklyn didn't even h-wait a minute.
She stays in this position for twelve hours before somebody finds her.
Did you remember to remove the soda from it first?
At Shinjiro's insistence. Trust me.
Did we just sit through a six hour marathon of Plague Dogs?
That explains the weed smell that permeated through the theater.
Wait, wasn't this repeated in Persona 4?
You're not gonna want to miss this.
"I can understand why Kazushi didn't want to look."
Is he suggesting Kazushi's gay? That explains a lot.
Why didn't the Gourmet King tell me about any of this? (Or is he referring to the hospital?)
The question of the ages.
Damn it, Junpei! Your racism has ruined a perfectly good screenshot!
Now I can see why you guys don't like Kenji.
"Trust me. I know a guy."
"Let's fucking do this, man. I don't give a shit; I'll kick your fucking ass."
Let's sabotage the shit out of this.
Make sure they never escape.
If I needed one screenshot to summarize this entire feature...
When a mommy and a daddy have hit a serious rut in their marriage...
Somebody inform the Gourmet King!
She's learning self control.
They know, Junpei. They know.
"Your idiocy is exhausting the shit out of me."
"God, Chihiro, can't I just hang out with my friends without you butting in!?"
"We're gonna let it all hang out."
You went to the drug store with Chihiro to see which medicines were lethal if overdosed.
Shinjiro: Robot in Disguise.
"I know you watched the recording. I don't want anybody else to know."
Yea, that presidential nip slip sure was....something.
Shove the still-warm butt in his eyes.
Yea, no, there's no way that could possibly backfire.
Damn, Japanese is a hard language.
Like the Matrix? Please let it be like the Matrix.
So Einstein was a wizard?
9 is the only holy number. The rest are all blasphemous.
Nobody tell Pythagoros about different bases. It'll blow his mind.
"The leading theory in this field is the Nonary Game."
"It's called a dictionary."
"OH GOD! I think I saw a two." "There's no such thing as two, Aigis."
Because of course it can.
I got 42. Now I just have to figure out what the hell THAT means.
Brooklyn Rage is a walking contradiction to your theory.
"There aren't enough buildings for the two of us."
Edogawa's patented two-finger approach.
Another day in the life of a Capcom executive.
Do most sons punch their dads during fellatio?
"Nothing makes me happier than crushing a woman's emotions."
Is this how Japanese people swear?
"You wake up in a puddle of your own vomit and regret."
"That's how the kids say it nowadays, right? You're totally XYZ, male-bro."
That must be one big fucking tag.
The source of Aigis' nightmares.
The twist: his secret scammy cult was Christianity.
"You don't lose weight through prayer."
You're going to die of a heart attack before you even graduate.
Because there's nothing less conspicuous than a glowing fat child.
That's code for "I haven't had my communion snack yet".
"If you're going to talk about me in secret, you may not want to do it so audibly."
"This I don't want to hear."
"Don't worry. I know to stay away from his mouth while he's eating."
Yea, this isn't creepy or perverted in the slightest.
"I probably shouldn't do that, what with the security cameras absolutely anybody can access."
"Yes, I know you're watching me. No, you're not going to see me naked at any point in this feature."
Look humpable in the eyes of your date's friends!
"I don't mention my mom and Stupei every other sentence."
"Won't you help me decide, home audience?"
"She does NOT have an innocent face!"
I don't know how to feel about this being their immediate reaction.
"Please don't stand in the same spot for twenty minutes glaring at the two girls in front of you."
Man, fuck this. Fuuka is where it's at.
Either Chihiro has two mommies or is an alien clone of her progenitor.
So it's just fatigue? Then why bother with the fancy name?
Like, as a pet? Because you're already having enough trouble with Ken.
This whole Paradise thing was kinda contrived from the beginning.
The narrator finally recognizes the person who took his love's life.
The Gourmet King is also an expert theologian, apparently.
"This pleases me, for some reason."
That's simply the spirits in your head trying to escape.
I don't think dates the with the Masamune have ever worked out well.
If anything, I thought you'd be the first to try it.
I want to make a MechDonald's joke, but every time I do, I imagine Aigis emotionlessly stating lines
"I swear to god, I'm gonna bust a nut if I see so much as a B-."
Too bad nobody actually speaks it.
So I see you've found my Twilight Princess blog.
"Wow, that sounds really stupid when I say it out loud."
Man, that is harsh Junpei. What did Ken ever do to you? Or at all?
THIS IS THE BEST GODDAMN BOSS BATTLE.
In what culture is this true?
"Excuse me. I have to go pay my respects to Susan Sarandon."
"No. I don't know a thing about you."
If Yukari could show up in this screenshot, I don't think the story would progress the way it does.
"How could Family Guy suck that hard by accident!?"
Dude, she's dead. You can do whatever you want, now. Wait...
"Uh, Yukari, we're all here. In fact, you're looking right at us."
Yoda grammar, she appears to be utilizing.
"Wearing a badass outfit, sounding like Solid Snake, and being a very useful party member. Wait...."
"Seriously, how has nobody noticed the Dark Hour, yet!?"
"Who's the Gourmet King now?" "Still not you."
"No, Ken, I am your mother." "That's false! That cannot be real!"
"Yea, her name's Chidori."
It was about here that I noticed that little red bead. Seriously, what the hell is that thing?
Somebody showed Takaya this screenshot.
It's not that good in motion.
Even in death, he looks absolutely badass.
Amazing that it took this long.
"Not that that means much. I mean, everybody has opportunity, right?"
"I am being informed that Shinjiro did NOT kill himself."
Better fake-study for that not-real-exam. Don't want to disappoint your fake-parents.
"It didn't take him this long to die."
Is that how you greet the dead? I'm not sure what the protocol is here.
No, he's definitely the dead one, Akihiko.
"NOW WHO ELSE WANTS TO JOIN SHINJIRO UP HERE!?"
You know, the mythological figure Caesar.
Please tell me you have video of the latter.
Into your mouth, presumably.
Listening Student from two days ago could have used that advice.
Man, this ramen shop sure is an emotional place.
That reminds me: I have to order a sandal phone.
This makes way too much sense.
I am now two kings. RECOGNIZE, MOTHERFUCKERS.
Does it take a lot to master eating?
"It's like my dad told me over and over and over again: none of the blame is yours."
This was a potential continuity disaster. POTENTIAL.
By being shot in the back and then walking away?
Continue the course, Brooklyn.
"Isn't that right, Mitsuko?" "........." "See that? Pure joy."
So when you first saw this woman crying at your very presence, your immediate response was to stay?
"Hey, old man, where did I punch you last time? I want to open old wounds."
Why wait? Let's do this shit, man.
"You're not gonna find her up there, either."
"You are alone in this world and nobody loves you."
"Hey, look at me when I'm telling you you can go die, for all I care."
"I should follow that advice Shinji was always muttering to himself."
With Shinjiro's death come a shitton of Persona upgrades.
I just realized how utterly dumb his Persona has always looked.
Resident Evil villain has given rise to something that looks like a Digimon.
You'd think somebody would have buried the damn corpse by now.
Allow me to explain in a billion fucking words.
"Damn it, Fuuka. This smell's never coming out!"
Of course it is. I'm with you.
Are you my dad? The hell's going on?
I was going to comment on how he's stating the obvious, but fuck, those eyes, man.
"See? Look at my eyes. They're different, now."
"I just found out there are a couple more months at the end of the calendar. Who knew?"
"There's this girl at the coffee shop who has a thing for me, but..."
Yes. I have been absolutely clear about that.
How did she get such awesome spells? Is she a Strega agent?
"If you're gonna drink some gross tequila, do it outside, so you don't bother anybody."
Zorro? It was Zorro, wasn't it?
"How did your life get this low?"
Keep in mind that he never said anything about running.
"Koro-chan says that it was quite gangster of him."
And by "ahead", you mean "around my level".
"I never knew that vaseline was edible."
Why does this screen even exist? Also, why are her stats such shit for the level she's at?
I still fucking win this shit.
Turns out she's fighting a completely different enemy that doesn't exist. I am dead serious.
Turns out to be very easy.
Since when did I have a wand? (Since I considered blogging about Wing of Madoola for a Disney joke.)
Yea, this isn't creepy or perverted in the slightest.
Point to it, Fuuka. Point to the kiss of life.
So give it to the girl with the Lovers Arcana. Makes perfect sense.
It's like Ganondorf's and Sigma's disgusting love baby.
Great. She's gonna blab about her mom from here to Tellius.
Jesus Christ! Is Michael Vick roaming the halls of Tartatus!?
That's just how shadows work.
"Re radows retray you, recause rey rerong ro re! Ree-hee-hee-hee-hee."
Was the translator stabbed halfway through writing this line?
I like to imagine she's doing her best Igor impression.
"SHOW THEM WHERE THE ACTION IS! YEEAAAAAA!!!"
Thor's just bummed that he had to hang out with Take-Mikazuchi today.
You saying you're up for something, Elizabeth?
Me. She's referring to me.
"I'm right here. In fact, you're looking right at me."
("How much money would Kurosawa pay for something like that?")
"That's it, nice and slow."
Is that why he's brandishing the knife?
"Somebody named a store after me? Yay!"
Hey, I recognize this from Creep's episode of Hoarders!
Yes, this is a solution to a sidequest. Why? Who the hell knows?
"Still, that's never stopped you before."
Did I just stumble into Zelda 2?
These billions of screenshots, for instance.
The game says that this is of sentimental value to Elizabeth. Let that sink in.
"YOU THINK I DON'T KNOW!?"
Knock, knuckle, kick, kink....nah, probably doesn't mean anything.
He knows of your crimes, Brooklyn.
Mitsuko, on the other hand, is clearly suffering.
"I mean, you have to buy a special swing for that kind of thing."
WHAT THE HELL WERE YOU DOING BEFORE I JOINED SEES!?
"Aw, look at the poor baby without any notes. Are you gonna cry? Are you gonna cry, baby?"
"I feel like I'm gonna squirt blood out of my anus. And I don't even have an anus."
Why's there a space there? That's not how you spell it.
"Actually, I'm here to ask what the hell is going on with the two chairs to my right."
This piques Brooklyn's interest.
"Whether or not to get a side of fries with that hot dog....A GREATER TRAGEDY THAN ANTIGONE!"
"I could have known his sensuous touch."
I'd make a drug joke, but I think this was already a joke in a Looney Tunes cartoon.
WHAT HAPPENED TO HER LEGS!?
You can summarize some of my blogs with this very screenshot.
That's still enough for Brooklyn Rage.
Now he has a justification for stabbing fishes' eyes out and then releasing them back into the wild.
"How's my impression of Koromaru? Good, right?"
"You didn't want anybody else hearing about your plans."
"I'm gonna whoop this dog's ass, right here and now!"
The look on her face just completes it.
"They lock me in the basement and tell me to eat cockroaches for sustenance."
Curiosity killed the cat. And Akinari.
"I told the judge THAT, too! Didn't help much."
"The doctors say it's like there's a civil war between my kidneys."
"This Social Link is just way too goddamned depressing to handle."
Open your eyes, Mitsuru. You're no longer riding that horse.
"I told the doctors that not having human genitals, I do not menstruate."
Whose brain did they rip out to create Aigis?
About that outfit. Seriously, what the hell?
"What a coincidence, indeed. I was just about to go home."
As soon as you saw Keisuke.
"...In the night....leave her in..."
[DUN DUN DUUUUUUUUN] Still, makes more sense than anything in 999.
Remind her that she exists.
The real twist: Mitsuko was a ghost the entire time. Her memory haunts Bunkichi to this very day.
Japan: Our Captain Planet is a motherfucking dragon. Clearly, everybody else is doing it wrong.
Like, the day after? Man, what an abrupt ending.
Just to be clear: we're talking about Aigis, not Yukari.
Unfortunately, you just realized that you were supposed to use a #2 pencil.
He knows. Obama won't rest until you're dead.
"He's my man, Chihiro. Just accept that."
"It seems like she wants to tongue fuck you in front of Mitsuru, but is too nervous to start."
"That way, I don't have to pay them a damn thing. How do you think my family got so rich?"
"I'm kind of psychotic like that."
"I don't know why I'm asking you for proof, though. Seems like the dumbest idea in the world."
Are we....are we gonna fuck? Because I haven't even started Social Linking with you, Mitsuru.
Scratch that: she may get upset if you so much as interact with another female character in the game
Damn it, Mitsuru! Why did you have to ruin my chances with her?
"I swear I'm gonna stab any bitch who stands between me and Brooklyn!"
"How does he even get into the school without setting off the metal detector?"
I think even Ono over there is looking down in shame.
"You're one crazy girl, Chihiro. And that's just the way I like it."
"Hahahahaha. You're mine forever. Hahahahahahahaha."
"I say on the roof of a school with an easily scalable fence."
"Man, you should see a psychiatrist. AND THIS IS ME TELLING YOU THIS."
Am I gonna get laid? BEST SOCIAL LINK EVER.
Just for that, you get to go to summer school this November.
"What are you doing with that gun? What's that stain on the handle? WHAT A-"
"Seriously, Brooklyn. She's been dead for two years."
"Ya'll wonderin' why I'm talkin' like a gol-darn cowboy, pardner? I can be anything. In my dreams."
"He's smart enough to know where the throat is. Now, what was it you told me, again?"
Persona 3: a world where people express their anger with illness.
"Who's the asshole who made me the Sun Arcana?"
The only reason God doesn't erase you from the face of the earth is because you amuse him, somehow.
Maybe because you're "dying"? (Oh, fuck, please don't tell me I just predicted this.)
Well, there goes that Social Link.
Crime joke or sex joke? YOU decide!
Too bad I can't act on it for a long time.
The voices of all your victims. They haunt you still.
"It seems like none of you even came close to solving it. No clue why."
IT'S ALL A CONSPIRACY BY KING CALENDAR!
Did you take pictures? Because I definitely would have.
I'm gonna start calling my penis a freak flag.
NOTHING CAN NULL THIS RAGE.
"What did she eat last night?"
"Last time I trust somebody else to buy my drugs for me."
Ekoda's having a stroke, guys! Somebody call 911!
Fucking impossible to learn -_-.
"This is rather odd, since neither you nor nobody you know speaks a word of the language."
She's invading Hidetoshi's Social Link now!
Don't pretend you don't know, Chihiro.
"I want him dead, and I want it NOW!"
Despite the fact that I haven't studied since September at the latest.
Even though people aren't supposed to see me during the Dark Hour. Strange, isn't it?
This is just how Brooklyn greets people.
No, that's a shitty catchphrase.
Man, Yukari must be tripping balls right now.
It took me this long to realize it wasn't my class.
Wish I could see for myself.
Wait, Chihiro's leaving? But I was THIS CLOSE to maxing her Social Link!
"I'm taking that joke with me when I leave. Did I mention that I'm leaving?"
The only boat in this game, and it's metaphorical.
What happens when I enter a thread.
Because you are in control of all things everywhere at all times forever.
"Give the audience that look, for once."
"After all, everybody likes a slut."
Guess how many times she said this during the cutscene. Go on. Guess.
"The SMT-est supervillain in all of Japan."
BOOM! Another Persona evolution.
"Why did you bother summoning me now? Shadows only appear during the Dark Hour, Fuuka."
Christian martyr gives rise to Roman goddess based on Greek goddess. That's progress, right?
THE SCENE OF A BILLION REACTION SHOTS!
The eye contact here is a mess. At least Junpei's trying...kind of.
"My only reason for living. Mmmmmm......"
There are only four here, though.
Don't make me do this, Ms. Toriumi.
Not at all. In fact, it seems like I'm several days early.
"Why am I coughing up blood?"
"It was me. I'm always watching you, Toriumi. No matter where you go, in your most intimate moments.
"Can I borrow your switchblade? I know you're flipping it in your pocket."
Wipe that smug smile off your face, Brooklyn. You're about to die.
Neither of those are true.
"Look, I haven't had a decent Social Link with you in a while, so this is the next best thing."
"Yea, he DOES have a nice ass."
"So it's not entirely clear why everybody's still hanging about."
The conspiracy goes deeper still.
"You know how to embezzle like there's no tomorrow."
It's just a coincidence that they spend the night crying.
Motherfucker tells everyone as soon as they leave.
If anything, they'd make fun of the writers.
"The accumulated filth of all their sex and murder will foam up about their waists and all the..."
Apparently, nobody around here can keep track of who and who hasn't died.
An ordinary half-man, half-dog, all female elementary school student.
How many other ways are there to wear it?
God, how I wish she'd make that face more often.
Next series of screenshots: she shoots the hell out of that idea.
Her Junpei impression is priceless. Too bad this is a fucking picture.
"Not that you have a choice in the matter. Welcome to the world of slave labor."
"You think I'd have realized that when I didn't buy it from a Halloween store."
Take note of how she's pointing it in the wrong direction.
"They look stupider than mine!"
Brooklyn ends up wearing the third.
You know, for being a girl, you sure do take a long time to unhook a bra.
Go ahead, Ravenlight. Photoshop "But I poop down there" into this. I know you want to.
Your savoring the moment will slow things down quite a bit, though.
It beckons, Ravenlight. It calls out to you.
"Who knew people of the same nationality could have different opinions on things?"
"That's the reason why I'm not allowed at the gym anymore."
FUCKING UNDERSTATEMENT OF THE THREAD.
Wait, is Elizabeth calling ME a racist?......Well played, Velvet Girl. Well played, indeed.
What does that even mean?
Does that mean you're gonna use it to cut yourself like crazy, like Raquesis in the Oosawa manga?
The fact that it was gangrenous is just a coincidence.
"I have to admit, that was quite impressive."
Yep, I have a totally awesome sword.
It's not as good as it sounds.
Wait, what's that vial around his neck? Is there a pixie trapped in there?
Keep in mind that to get this screen, you would have had to present her many swords previously.
Google wasn't any help in the matter.
Something like this should be massively illegal. Not that it would stop Brooklyn from getting them.
I was going to Photoshop it to say "I am Tanaka! Behold my power!", but then this happened.
Don't cast grammar on him! It's just gonna reflect back at you!
"Guess which ones we still pay actual attention to?"
I had no idea. (Should the stinger be an Invader Zim reference or a Simpsons reference?)
Apparently, they're all magic.
That means "religious wisdom". IE not a lot.
"Unfortunately, he was jailed for life for his teachings on the Fourth Hole."
"Get this question wrong, and I will travel back in time and change the day you were born."
"I bought the game guide. Good luck with that."
The screenshot I'm sure you'll all use in reference to me.
"The roving blackouts saw fit to that."
"Stigmata. It pisses me off, man."
Don't do it, Hidetoshi. You're gonna give Brooklyn the urges.
"But don't worry. I won't tell anybody. As long as I get my cut, that is."
WHAT!? That is NOT what he taught you, Hidetoshi. I don't even think Brooklyn understands concern.
You picked it up with your shirt so you wouldn't get your fingerprints all over it.
"I'm honestly surprised you haven't been executed, yet."
The best Social Links reward you with fucking Norse gods.
Man, what a weak god denomination, especially for somebody like Odin.
"And it's YOUR fault, Brooklyn!"
There's a very good reason for that.
Take a drink every time this comes up. You won't get very drunk.
"He definitely had sex with my mom. I REALLY don't like to think about it."
Trust me: after the several times that question has been asked, I'm well aware of that.
A more accurate description would be "Chihiro visibly trembled while you stared angrily at her."
"Did you leave it on the table over there?" "...Goddamn it."
This becomes a lot less sentimental when you realize she's way into hentai.
"Get this girly shit out of my face."
One step closer to becoming the creep who harassed Chihiro so long ago.
"It was me. They were gonna take you away from me, Brooklyn, and I couldn't let that happen."
Just set her on fire, and it's just like Katawa Shoujo.
"I don't want anybody seeing what I'm about to do to you."
Yes. It is exactly what you think it is.
Their naivitee knows no bounds.
Damn it, Chihiro. I've maxed out your Social Link, and you still won't let me near other women?
He closes his eyes and pretends he's fucking Mitsuru.
"I'm still dressed. Give me a m-ow. No, you're hurting me. Just let g-"
Too bad we had to censor it.
"Why do you smell like Yukari's mom?"
Wait, did he actually say something that sort of makes sense?
"No. Not at all. More felons, really."
"The bathroom is so far away, but there's a sink right there in my room."
If ever there was a screenshot to summarize Brooklyn Rage, this would be only one of them.
"How do you think I got sick?"
Of course. Who the hell doesn't?
Pick your joke. [This may apply to me quite well.] [But you're outside.]
Rated PG-13. Coming to theaters long after this kid is dead.
"I'll just look away and let what happens happen."
"I'm not into that pussy shit."
"For what, I did not catch."
"Why are you even here anymore? Brooklyn maxed you LONG ago."
"People in the Middle East just have to guess the time when there aren't any clocks around."
"At that desk. And crying myself to sleep."
"Just you and me, all alone in this school."
"But seriously, pull your fly up."
That dick sure can take a lot punishment.
This isn't gay or anything, right?
"I want to make some lonely airplane pilot's day with the stuff we're about to do."
"I, too, have a strong dislike for the Iori child."
Maybe because you're a silent protagonist.
"It wasn't until the medics arrived that people realized he was joking."
For what, I do not want to know.
He predicted I'd make this thread and keep it going forever. It wasn't a hard prediction to make.
The literal translation makes no sense. (It means "surprised".)
I have to admit, that hair does look pretty 寂しい.
Now what the hell does Toriumi mean?
The one screenshot that might actually teach you some Japanese.
I've got no fucking clue what any of this means. I think it's just a stroke.
Somebody hold an intervention for poor Mrs. Terauchi.
Beginners are not allowed to advance past Richy.
You mean "hand"? Is mahjong just saying random phrases with a thick (racist) Japanese accent?
Only advanced players are allowed the tiles.
I think I heard that in a Teen Titans episode.
Just regular students who spend all day looking out windows.
It seems like a good idea to have an eating competition while you're already eating.
This is my reward for completing the Gourmet King Link first.
I'm honestly surprised that Brooklyn was able to keep up with this coked-out maniac.
So is Mamoru, apparently.
"For who? Only one person can lose."
"Junpei says that stuff all the time. After a while, you just sort of tune it out."
"Yes, that's totally illegal, Ken."
He doesn't have much choice. He'll be the cause of it all.
"Even this suit. I stole it off his corpse so I could be with Masamune all day long."
Don't delay the inevitable. Once Brooklyn has his mind set on something, he's gonna get it.
Wouldn't that mean we're in the same class?
"I punched him straight in his smug goddamn face. That's what he gets for not being a samurai."
The word "again" is throwing me for a loop.
"However, you seem to have had trouble flushing it down. Let somebody else worry about it, though."
Were samurai deep into S&M?
Tihs oen's for you, dlxiesyc rdereas.
And then Ounishi slaps the shit out of poor Brooklyn.
Don't tell the Gourmet King.
"We're gonna do ALL the drugs, man!"
Even though everybody's paused, the steam and TV and other environmental effects aren't.
Remember remember the third of November.
"Tell me about it." "What?" "Nothing."
Do you need to gargle some water or something?
Brooklyn: summon Thor. Put Edogawa in his goddamn place.
"No, seriously, what's summoning magic? I have no goddamn clue."
Wait, WHAT?! I didn't think this would be the game to break the fourth wall.
"Unfortunately, this only resulted in Edward biting into Santa's neck at a crowded mall."
"...summoning magic consists of Anglican priests throwing playing cards around the vicinity."
And then go on a Buddhist rampage through nonexistence.
"YOUR FOOD IS POISONOUS AND SO IS YOUR WOMB."
And suddenly gained weight. Seriously, the hell's going on with her body in this shot?
"And tell Bunkichi that I planted another tree there just to fuck with him."
"Same here. Just two old boring old farts, if you ask me."
Shouldn't you know? You two spent the whole day together.
Maybe if you approach him from another angle...
"You have taught these children how to count. Sadly, you were supposed to teach them athletics."
How bad does your love life have to be if fourth graders are questioning your romantic decisions?
Quiet, Yuko! We don't want Chihiro hearing about this.
"Were you even listening?" "No."
"But your heart belongs to, like, three other girls already. Also, you sense an unexplained fog."
"What the shit, man? Why are all your conversations so goddamn depressing?"
"But seriously, why can't everybody else die first? It wouldn't be so bad, then."
Wait, is Akinari a possessive girlfriend, too?
"Just come here each Sunday and I'll just hand you the rank up, alright?"
He knows I haven't used him in forever.
"Last meal? Why? Are we gonna die?" "...Just ignore that."
Neo Featherman X, duh! (Or whatever the hell it was.)
Yukari's hiding something. About her mom, no doubt.
To spite Chie, presumably.
Somebody turn this into a movie poster.
The same day as that incident ten years ago, except not at all.
"Did you murder your dad?" "Why? You gonna tell somebody?" "Job well done!"
Drug use, murder, and pedophilia: the Persona 3 experience.
Still, this thread ate up a shitton of my time.
"You don't hear me complaining about having an extra hour each night and a magical other self."
"I just can't forgive him for fucking my mom."
Hey, Ken. They killed you.
"AND THAT WORRIES ME!!!!!!!"
I think this is the first time we've actually heard his name.
You know what he wanted to say. WE ALL KNOW.
The hell is this? When did this pop up?
What a friendly character model.
Slap this shit on the back of the box.
You're still not fooling anybody with that comb-over, Jin.
"Wait, what were our Arcanas, again?"
"Now that I say that out loud, that's a very significant thing to overlook."
Huh? Did he buy his Persona from some Persona mill?
"Do you know what snow does to leather, you assholes!?"
"I need some help here, T-oh, fuck."
"You have such smooth skin, Takaya."
"We're here, we're queer, get used to it!"
"Damn it. What a time to trip."
That was clearly jumping.
I've played enough Star Fox 64 to know that something's up.
As good as this is, the next screenshot is even better.
The reaction shot to end all reaction shots.
I didn't even have to Social Link with her to get laid.
Should I Photoshop Adachi's face onto this?
"ARMS AREN'T SUPPOSED TO BEND THAT WAY!"
Girls need to eat, too, Junpei.
"If he drops it in the middle, you hire that man and never let him out of your sight."
"I say after witnessing two people commit suicide."
"Koromaru's, specifically. We have to remind you who the dog of the house really is."
"Goodbye, Dark Hour" is coincidentally the name of Mitsuru's favorite kid's book.
"I just have to remember never to do that with Junpei ever again."
"Then why is it so dark?"
"That coffee shop girl just doesn't take 'no' for an answer. Mind taking her off my shoulders?"
And now I'm off to Thesaurus.com to look up the opposite of "miracle".
"That's what I tell myself so I know there's a time when I won't see you ever again."
"Even without forever, we will never be separated."
"Do you hear that? I will always be with you. Always."
Even though you were able to do that just fine the day you got Persona.
"I thank you for your dad dying. Really, it freed up a lot of money at my business."
"Damn it, Junpei, I can't have that evidence floating around. Do you know how much time I'd serve?"
"Knock what off?" "You know damn well."
The only three characters with faces.
A screenshot of a photo? I think I know what the stinger for this entry will be.
You didn't really think this would be the end, did you?
"Where's the rest of my dialogue?"
"Well, except for that lens. The optometrists are stumped."
"He disappeared one or two updates ago." "Really? Why didn't anybody tell me about this before?"
This is a Shin Megami Tensei game, alright.
So THAT'S why there hasn't been a Prince of Persia game since The Fallen King!
So I should become a Prince so I can become a Triple King?
"You're almost as bad as my whore of a mother!"
That's not a real gun, Junpei.
And...always look on the bright side of life...
"How are they just floating in the air like that?"
"Why hast thou forsaken me?" "But I'm ri-" "Can't I be dramatic for one minute?"
"He lost his eye, and he didn't even get a cool story from the incident."
A Criticism of Christianity.
Hierophant...! Emperor...! Hanged Man...!
That's how long this game is. (Wait, why is Yukari's cross bent on the end like that?)
"Could somebody give me my hair back?"
Don't give me that innocent face, Brooklyn. It won't help you now.
"How do you change the channel with this damn thing?"
Koromaru's so awesome that even when he misses by a wide margin, Ikutsuki's still left bleeding.
"Aigis. Kill them all. So sayeth your new master."
The anime they actually put on the box.
Well, except for Mitsuru's dad. His last words were "None of the blame is yours."
"He came down with a fatal case of bullet to the chest."
"I've advised everyone to stop walking around naked in their dorm rooms."
"My Little Pony. It will be the end of us all."
"I think I'm gonna be sick."
NOTHING CAN STOP MY RENEGADE EG-er, PHOTO!
Correction: Billy Mitchell will be the end of us all.
This face is apparently sobbing.
"Watching her father die AGAIN has strengthened her emotional resolve."
Cow Thing has given rise to Wing Thing!
He's on the computer screen, Yukari, not on the ceiling.
"So stop pinching yourself like an idiot."
Because if there's anybody I'd want to hear the birds and the bees from the most, it'd be this guy.
"Not that it means anything to someone like you."
"But other people will have to deal with the consequences. Hint hint."
Is he telling me to end the world? Because hell yes.
"Once you ignore the many hideous scars you have from cutting yourself, that is."
"What's that smell? Where has your hand been!?"
THERE IS NO DOOR I CANNOT TRANSLATE!
So he's speaking, like, three languages at once.
He's been here sewing this entire time. That baseball cap alone took three months.
I was hoping to keep it that way.
See that, Miyahara? This is how you teach basic Japanese terminology.
Yes, I'm gonna capture all of these. Gotta bring some culture all up your ass.
You know what? I take back the Ed Hardy comparison. Bebe's more a Paarthurnax.
"Tell me, how ze 'ell was thees supposed to work original Japanese de?"
Not much, but it's something.
That's actually a very complex topic.
For instance, this is the answer you give if you're a complete asshole.
This is the answer I gave, because I'm a fucking idiot.
I've given him a combination of sounds that cannot possibly work in Japanese. Job well done.
"Not according to these adoption papers I found." "W...what?"
WHY HAVEN'T I BEEN PARTYING WITH HER!?
"Be very thorough. I didn't make it in time, and boy, did it spread."
"You're ten." "Good point."
Because for whatever reason, they're best friends.
"And remember to look away, when...actually, I think you'll know."
"OH GOD! WE'RE ALL GOING BLIND!"
Long story short: back alley hookers.
"Do you know anybody who could teach me?" ".........."
Actually, it just kinda glows.
"The rest are boring as dirt."
"She died the next day. Pretty cool legend, right?"
"Because she stabbed herself right through the gut."
All those mouths still scream for death.
Trust me: it's already nulling whatever charm it ever had.
What a badass knife. Why are we giving it to the dog?
Wait, that actually sort of looks like the Hermit. Hooray for that. (Too bad the fight is easy.)
Specifically, from looking at Yuko right after Chihiro's links.
I put it on Brooklyn so everybody could see his rippling pecs. And his genitals.
What's the German add to this?
"What's that feeling in my pants? I haven't felt that since '59."
Even the NPCs are racist.
"Say 'Japan'. Corporate was very specific about that."
Yet somehow, you were able to sneak by just fine in the past 200 bonus scenes.
She then pulls a complete 180 on her shirt.
She knows who Chihiro will target first.
Except the judgmental gaze of all those high schoolers.
Good luck, sister. I haven't seen a cafeteria in this school the whole time I've been here.
Food is an unreasonable request for school vendors.
"In fact, I know it from firsthand experience. It's all my master cares to feed me."
That's not what I got from it. Ever.
"Your generation is fucked, Brooklyn."
Awesome! I spent all night studying for this!
Who taught her to teach? Pavlov?
Somehow, she plays dubstep on this bad boy.
"I felt two sets of eyes watching me with the most intense jealousy."
Just don't take a black light to it.
So part of Brooklyn is a frightening transexual? That makes way too much sense.
"But instead, you walked into the bathroom brandishing a goddamn longsword."
It's Yukari's toothbrush.
Guess what he makes her do?
"Long term, huh? I like how you think."
"Being dead ain't easy, you know?"
"Nobody would ever know if I skinned you alive and wore you as a body suit."
"But then he stopped being a good dog. Well, long story short, I still keep his spine above my bed."
The word you want is "fucked up".
"No matter how badly I try to suppress the memories..."
"YOUR PUNS HAUNT US FROM BEYOND THE GRAVE!"
Next time you see her, she's wearing a push-up bra.
HOLY FUCKING FUCK! Her bladder's gonna explode!
That's as close as I could ever get to that poster. I WANT TO KNOW MORE!
"You're also quite adept at killing them, too."
"Look, man, do you have any pink alligator on you? I'm coming down, man!"
"Oh. I thought it was drugs."
"The forest then killed him, for the woods are quite homophobic."
Don't you DARE say that about Mamoru! Animals have perfectly valid reasons not to like him!
"He ate that fucker in two seconds."
No, people are going to love a novel about a pink alligator and his bird friend.
What, you thought I was kidding with the novel comment before?
You wouldn't be so happy if you heard the rest of that message.
And then she pulls out a copy of The Watchtower.
"It's almost like the administration just dumps them on us."
"I fucking hate you, Ryoji. I hate everything about you."
"Go ahead. Introduce yourself." (Another joke that works better spoken.)
For some reason, the girls consider him sexy. I don't get it, either.
"I don't want them to know what we're doing under this desk."
Girls suck at whispering.
Ms. Toriumi: the woman of 1000 confusing statements.
One more reason I love Aigis as a character.
"And you never will. *shoots him in the junk*"
"Says the girl with more mother issues than Sterling Archer."
"That's all you're going to know of me. *shoots him in the junk*"
"Guess who just wasted $200?"
"And I found your fingerprints at the crime scene, Junpei." "WHAT?!"
"How many said yes? Less than you can count on one hand?"
$100 buses? Did the Japanese economy collapse in the last few updates?
"You wanted some, but Mamoru stole yours and called you a 'bitch ass pussy' when you asked it back."
"Takiyoki sure does taste better stolen, huh?"
"DON'T YOU DARE ASK THAT, BROOKLYN!"
"Turns out a criminal record sort of fucks that up."
"Well, she would be if I hadn't killed her, too. Kinda wish I could see her face through the pillow.
It was about here that I noticed the octopus holding a gun and liquor in the upper right.
"So I could kill him again and again and again."
"I need a new hat, anyway."
"Not another innocent man, being lured in by my monstrous mother...no...no...."
Fragile Dreams: Farewell Ruins of the Junpei. You know I'm going to Photoshop this bad boy.
Go see a doctor about that.
"That's what your overseers tell you."
"What?" "終わり. It means 'over'." "Oh. That's dumb."
He means "sweat shop", but, you know, the accent.
Is that the word you want to use?
"I 'ate zee delicious dessert. Zat eez why I used zee swear."'
Somebody hand Bebe his weeaboo card. He has earned it.
Just humor him. It'll be hilarious.
Another minefield for beginners like him.
"I also weesh zee anime girls were real, so I could date zem."
Elizabeth, I'm pretty sure what you're suggesting is illegal in....well, everywhere, really.
I want to learn what a French accent sounds like in Japanese. I know that shit exists out there.
"I really love zee Tomodachi you 'ave 'ere."
"Too bad she can't just kill Shinjiro again. Believe me; I've tried."
"The dungeons were all first person, and there was this really confusing formation system."
Move over, Akihiko. (Does anybody even remember when that was part of his character? Me neither.)
They're just playing a game of Zims and Dibs. Nothing special.
"Chihiro didn't hear that. You know how crazy that girl is, right?"
Let it be known that Yuko puts out slightly faster than Chihiro.
Same area as Chihiro, oddly enough...........Oh, fuck.
"Well, you will be once you're able to get it up."
"Did you bring the condom?" "You know I didn't."
"I just thought it would be bigger."
"With you?" "....Yes, that's where I was going with that, but humor me."
Another generation must be blessed with the sexiness that is Brooklyn Rage.
Is her vagina made of pumice?
She just realized the myriad issues with calling a baby fuckable.
"You realize as you stare at Yuko instead of the window."
"I don't even know the meaning of the word 'strap-on'."
Wasn't there a terrifying thread about this?
"Too bad you left your underpants smack dab in the middle of Yuko's floor."
"Koro-chan is asking why your shirt is inside out."
"...in reality, it isn't. You think there'd be so much poverty and overcrowding with magic?"
He's talking about Lunarians. Why do you think I'm not capturing any other screenshots?
Or maybe not. Screenshot away.
"They're just mostly about it."
He forgets two seconds later.
"You hear explosions and see smoke rising from far away. Surely, the two events aren't related."
"Or tried to. Mamoru punched you in the gut and stole your beef bowl the minute it came out."
"That way, I only have to pay for one."
"Then they found my collection. Now, I'm swimming in their blood. It gives me vitality."
"I'm gonna have to fix that."
"It's hard to RSVP when you cut out a person's tongue and eat it in front of them."
"You don't want to KNOW what I do to them..................."
Now's the time to back away slowly.
"That's why they have to die. And you, too, if you so much as tell a single person about all this."
"Seriously, don't tell anybody about it. You wouldn't want anything to happen to those legs."
"God knows how you're able to intuit THAT."
I am SO tempted to Photoshop Nixon's face onto this. No, I don't know why.
"You took it to Elizabeth and let the poor bastard starve."
I'd bring her some cat food from the nearby pharmacy, but I'm afraid she'll punch the shit out of me
GET TO IT, FAN ART CREW THAT DOESN'T EXIST.
Wait, wasn't this in Persona 2 already?
So is Apathy Syndrome like a strain of herpes that just makes you really tired?
Somebody send this girl Bambi. I want to ruin her life.
Wish I could say the same for you, Napoleon Nobunaga.
I've already misinformed him once. What damage could one more do?
Why are you giving me that look? It was YOUR idea.
"Zat Mr. Ono just eesn't samurai eenough for me."
"That's why I'm taking Yukari's life first thing in the morning."
Apathy Syndrome: the mystery illness that can affect vague abstractions.
Nanako taught you a few things, didn't she?
"Now that I've irrevocably damaged Bebe's Japanese..."
The answers lie in his pants.
"Just read Peter Pan. The Lost Boys killed more people than Hitler with all their breathing."
"You can verify this by holding your breath for 4 minutes."
I can't tell if he means Shinto or if he's actually referring to something called Shingo.
That's very close to my dick. Just saying.
"I don't even believe in the clitoris. Am I right, ladies?"
Edogawa: The Man Who Thinks with his Dick.
"And then rub it....slowly...just like....I'm doing....just rub it..."
Stop throwing me such easy jokes, Edogawa.
"If it does, it's because God hates you and all that you hold dear."
ASTRAL self? But I'm still dealing with my other self.
"Brooklyn's MY man. You hear me?" (This comes back to haunt me quite soon.)
"Don't, Yukari. Don't tell me about your mother. We've all heard enough of it."
"Hope I'm not interrupting any major story moments or anything."
You know, for being a ladies' man, he sure isn't popular with any of the female characters.
"She exploded into nothing when I pointed out the contradiction. Funny, right?"
"Tell me: how many testicles do you have left?" "What a st-OH GOD!"
"I want to take you to a restaurant on top of an average hotel. That's how much I think of you."
"How's the other nut?" "Nonononono-AAAAAAAAAAA"
"Did you get them from the pink alligator?"
"Just close your eyes and think of Mitsuru." "You mean pretend that Mitsuru has a penis?" "....Yes."
Fashion tips on the face.
Man, even the NPCs are racist.....Have I said that before?
"Behind that staircase. I don't think anybody will see us."
Hey, YOU'RE the one who suggested some staircase sex.
"You know how people give speeches by imagining everyone in their underwear?"
Her dialogue says no, but her portrait says yes.
What a badass way to describe a knife.
"I stab the dust off, and then she shoots away the grime."
Hey, look at that! One that actually makes sense!
"Man, I'm in such great condition after the death of my father."
That eye in the back? A camera.
So the person at Shinshudo is Yukari's mom? That's gonna be awkward.
"Just kidding. I have a billion more sidequests for you to fulfill."
What's more worrying: the purple Nazi motif, or the fact that all the Norse gods are half nude?
"Given the context, that is an incredibly strange thing to say."
Wait, she's embarrassed to change back into her regular uniform? (I checked.)
You think you'd just make a smaller bow.
By being pissed, apparently.
That stare....oh god, that stare...
Who is Kukai and why am I raiding his dresser?
I AM THE SPACE SHERRIFF. DON'T NONE OF Y'ALL FUCK WITH ME.
How many girls have asked Brooklyn for sex? How many have asked that their children have Megido?
"But could you wait for me to change clothes? I don't mind if the others watch, though."
It's even worse when SHE'S here.
Time to execute some motherfuckers.
Yea, that's totally what he looks like in the Bible.
"It's been so long since your last racist comment. I thought you were better than that."
I don't know, man. I'm pushing 100 updates total.
Actually, I think he's agreeing with Junpei.
Except for a walk. I wish that was a joke.
"Wear this, and prevent suicides in the family."
This is the strangest goddamn Disney movie I've ever heard described, even after the Pink Elephants
"I am SO pissed at the thing I wrote willingly and knowingly."
"That fork to the gut saw fit to that."
Would it even want to be alive after all that?
"Everything's been looking dark, recently...................."
"Did you consult a lawyer? I don't think your memoirs are legally binding."
That explains why nothing's written in it.
Man, what a strange novel that would be if it ever got published.
The strangest game of Metal Gear Solid I've ever heard.
"It's like my mom always told me: 'Best be brewing a butt baby on long trips.'"
Huh? Why the strange phrasing?
Maybe it's the fact that you don't have any ears.
It seems I've taught Aigis a little too well.
Fuuka saw. Fuuka saw it all.
"For once, she's not mentioning her mom."
Why are YOU jealous? I've only been with you thrice!
As soon as we leave: dog orgy.
No, I don't think he plays story games for the porn.
Hopefully, this means I can still Link with her.
"Paradoxically, that leaves me utterly exhausted."
Probably when I actually play it.
"Even the Japanese think all Asians look alike, apparently."
What the hell is she referring to?....Is this a Persona 2 reference?
She's referring to the cast of the hit new sitcom Apathy Syndrome.
The longer the hair, the better the face.
The shot I'm sure Atlus actually sent to reviewers and magazines and whatever.
Are they even around anymore?
"Go back to your cowboy world."
"Yea, Shinjiro died, but think about it: we didn't have to go to class that day. How great was that?
"Which executable would you like me to run?"
What? You don't remember the Wilt Destiny classic "Bumbi"?
"That's it. You're telling the janitor what you've been doing."
Don't worry. No Vocaloids this update.
Only one of you will get in Brooklyn's pants. (And is it just me, or is Yukari's hair longer here?)
Didn't stop me from taking the screenshots.
"Fighting is the only activity through which I can bond with others."
Who said this feature was over? NO STOPPING THIS RENEGADE PHOTO.
"And boy, did you fuck up."
"And how all the impure dirt has corrupted our pure race of glorious supermen."
"And on the outside, too."
"That's why I'm taking your li-" "You've already tried that." "Well, I guess Fuuka has it coming."
"OK, yes. Fuuka totally has it coming."
It looks like Mitsuru caught Brooklyn cheating on Yuko while Yukari distracts her with her fingers.
"Until he died, right?" "........" "Mwahahahaaha."
"Sadly, she's still alive."
"Just make up with Brooklyn so he can finish your storyline and be done with all these mom jokes."
Wait, has Female Student been Yukari this entire time?
("Oh no. She caught on.")
"So show me them titties, girl."
Goodbye, Disney Princess...
...and hello, whatever the hell this is.
Haven't I been Social Linking with you like crazy, though?
Junpei, it's the woman of your dreams.
"So they can escape all those icky girls."
"How could you not notice that your belt was loose?"
She's in absolute shock that I forgot to capture the image immediately before this.
"Why do you think we censored this?"
"Yes, Ryoji, we know how time works."
Wait, is Brooklyn actually naked this time?
No, it isn't. I want to know if I can see the Rage.
I was going to say that he's not wearing anything, but then I noticed THAT DUMBASS HAT HE BROUGHT.
"We don't even know if Ryoji experiences the Dark Hour, dumbass."
"You really are assholes for bringing me along."
I've finally figured it out: Junpei. He's the better character.
"Stop struggling, Ryoji. It'll all be over eventually."
"I mean, look at this thing. Is it SUPPOSED to curve like that?"
Ryoji upskirt. Wonderful.
No, Yukari, it really IS that small.
You're a few years late to the stealth game, Persona 3.
Nope, nothing sexual about this.
"Why aren't the rest of you naked?"
"If only somebody had warned me it'd be so hot in this hot spring."
Open your eyes and look up.
"For example, did you know that Fuuka's nipples are bigger than Yukari's?"
"Gonna show them a piece of Ryoji they'll never forget."
"...the aereolas are 5 centimeters wider in diameter."
"Man, I didn't think they'd sunburn THAT fast. Indoors. At night."
The hell is that? You look in a mirror, say your name three times, and discuss earnings?
"Have you seen what happened with Yukari? Of course I'm anxious!"
"Despite living in Kyoto for much of my life, I'd never seen the sunset there."
"Yukari just said that. You stole that from Yukari."
"See!? You're doing it again!"
"Brooklyn, what's a cougar?"
"No, I'm good to go in the dead of night."
"Are you saying you've managed to lick your own crotch?" "....Uh...."
Wait, they're guaranteed jobs on Tuesday? The only explanation I can think of is communist Russia.
Don't shake her hand, man. Don't do it.
Hey, look. She used it right.
Ryoji spills the beans and somehow loses a third testicle from the girls.
Bebe's Japanese word of the day: のっぺら坊.
"Relive the days of World War II."
Putin's siren call beckons...
"She's so annoying, with that loving husband of her's who's always waiting at home for her."
You need to be more specific.
Screenshots aren't enough for you?
The music is not what you think it is.
http://youtu.be/xFOy4P1YTQg?t=1m12s
"So how 'bout your mom? Hahahahaa" ".............." "Right."
"Wait, weren't YOU the one biting into my neck?" "Exactly. Don't make such a big deal about it."
Next up: mending my relationship with Fuuka. (We all know it's gonna break.)
"DO THESE STITCHES LOOK OK!?"
"Don't do it, Yuki. Don't go there."
"Seriously, bro. Why do I need experience to get a job? What a scam."
Do you want to fuck Ryoji? Wait, CAN you fuck Ryoji?
Still better than an iPad.
See this, Junpei? Who's the cowboy now?
This drink better be worth it.
She recognizes a compulsive alcoholic when she sees one.
Do it anyway. Watch that old couple cry.
As opposed to the non gummy gum?
"I have male and female genitalia." "Hey, guys!"
Uh oh. I think I mixed up some of the ingredients.
"The computer-y, Internetty taste."
Igor's seen weirder shit.
How? They all die in one hit.
Those shrooms JUST started kicking in.
"You have no idea what it is, nor will you ever know."
This commemorates your achievements in....generally being a freaky lady.
"I must say, I've never felt a knife this deep in my foot."
She's having real trouble coming up with decent rewards.
"Seriously. Look at this face. I'm game for anything."
Japan: where absolutely fucking everything is a pun.
"A run, if you will?" "What?" "Oh, uh, nothing."
Did Akinari just call us the n-word?
"The actual ill, this time. Not the 'he's so cool' ill."
"I hear what you're saying, but I still think there's such a thing as the Holocaust."
Has he been hanging out with Mamoru? I don't like where this Link is going.
"And slowly put your hand over his mouth."
"Just like you told me. I'm starting to think it was a bad idea."
I'll have to remember that word. For what, I do not know.
Damn it, Brooklyn, you already have a girlfriend. You want to piss off Yukari again?
Given that this will quite literally be your last story, I doubt it's gonna be any good.
This thing's never getting published, then.
I can't even reason that out. I don't think you find things by creating other things.
"I heard that, Junpei. Have you forgotten that I have guns for fingers?"
Have you tried fitting your fist inside your mouth?
This screenshot wasn't supposed to be sarcastic, but that's how it came out.
"No! That's a BAD Junpei! I'm gonna have to rub your nose in it so you don't do it again."
Interrupting a children's program with an urgent bulletin? Only good news can come from this.
In memorium of Kanji Tatsumi, who is still alive.
"...other police are telling Adachi to take his job seriously before he's sent off to the boonies."
Is he wearing his t-shirt to bed? Like, the shirt he wears outside? How has his life fallen so low?
"Methylchloroisothiazolinone. Did I say it right?" "You woke me up for THIS?"
"Seriously, the hell is that thing? Did somebody combine a spider and a fly or something?"
"This was a plot twist. I'm making a note here: 'Far too much'."
"I'll have to make sure she doesn't recover so quickly next time." "Uh, Fuuka, it's still on."
"Can't let you do that, Juuuun-pei."
"Perfect for crushing the Batman'sh shpine."
"Good thing I'm not in the room with any of you."
I think we all know the answer to this one.
What made this line for me is how Juno knocks down the frame rate JUST SO, leaving Junpei drunk.
Damn it. It IS Zombie Strega, isn't it?
"We simply cannot allow him to live."
"Man, your character model is disappointing."
Guys, seriously. Stop sending this thread to fictional characters.
"Who fights with words? Let us brawl with fisticuffs, like the men of old!"
Cesar Millan has taught her well.
Man, that censor bar is fucking lit.
I was simply going to leave this one be, but then I realized she's probably wearing a wig.
Where DOES she belong, then? I can't name a lot of games that would accept a girl this ostentatious.
Just imagine that I brought Junpei into this battle, even though that's technically impossible.
"The pain of my hair clipping through my body...it's too much."
Looking like that, it's painfully obvious why Jason abandoned her.
Yea, that Arcana makes sense.
"What time is it? Midnight? Nighty-night, then."
She hauls ass through Tartarus just to rescue you.
"There's already a character who can teleport to entrances outside Tartarus."
"My legs are tired." "Oh, OK."
"Chidori, that doesn't make any sense." "Junpei, there's a giant metal spike piercing my brain."
Now why does this seem familiar?
"I knew, Chidori. I knew." "And yet you stayed with me? Why?" "....I thought that sounded romantic."
Damn it. Turns out it WAS Zombie Strega.
Hey, hey, hey! Koromaru's right here, man!
"I can't believe we survived falling off a bridge. Suicide is harder than it looks."
"Hopefully, you learned what a bad idea family style is."
It's an Idiocracy reference, Junpei. Nothing more.
"Jin over there is, though. I think his bloated corpse is still on the shore."
"Am I wearing my school uniform? What kind of hospital is this?"
Oh, this is definitely a dream. There's no other way.
"I have a vagina instead of a penis." "Slow down, Chidori. You're not making any sense."
I made a Friday the 13th reference. Might as well make the Nightmare on Elm Street reference, too.
It's because I haven't used him in forever and he hasn't seen me using Recarm.
Die, because as that battle made absolutely clear, her Persona fucking sucks.
Maybe it's because your head is right next to his heart.
Oh, it might as well be a pun.
She dies not two seconds later.
Yep, this is still a dream.
"Junpei, why are you motorboating Chidori's corpse?"
I'd actually be worried if I bothered using him.
When Mitsuru's dad dies, she mopes about for a few weeks before Yukari slaps some sense into her.
"Other people can use Personae?!"
I have to admit, that does look kinda badass.
"MY ANGER FOR YOU PENETRATES THE VOID."
"Don't do it, Takaya. I need you. I can't live without you."
"How else am I supposed to shoot these bastards?"
No way this applies to me.
"Clearly, that was a bad decision."
"Except for Akihiko. He had no qualms ripping into Junpei."
"Watching somebody die has worn you out. You just have to accept that you aren't young anymore."
"They're dead, Fuuka." "Really? When did that happen?"
The lesson behind Persona 3: winners don't use drugs.
"Sparkles and fireworks. That's how I want to go."
That was a dream sequence, Aigis. It is quite within the bounds of spacetime.
"To me, there's nothing more sonorous than the sound of hot metal scraping against living bone."
"Maybe you should dial 911. They HAVE to listen to you now."
In this Social Link, that's not a word you EVER want to hear.
"The police caught on. I think somebody must have dialed 911."
"I saw her in the street, just passed out. I could have sworn her pulse stopped beating."
"So many victims, so little resistance."
"I swear, I'm gonna make sure she STAYS dead."
"I don't even consider it murder. I like to think of it as a late term abortion." "For your mom?"
Oh shit. THE POLICE MENTIONED BROOKLYN BY NAME!!!
"No, no no no no no. I'm not angry. Really. I'm perrrrrrfectly fine. No reason to worry. Really."
"Seriously, the minute you turn your back, I'm gonna hang you with your own intestines."
You know something bad is gonna happen when you can tell over the phone that his eyes are closed.
Tragic for who? It certainly wasn't tragic for Mamoru.
"A dead girlfriend? He's back on the market!"
God, put some confidence into it.
How impatient of you, Mitsuru.
Yep, still totally impatient.
So how have you been enjoying World of Warcraft?
"Junpei needs to nut the fuck up."
Tanaka, you cheap bastard!
"Fortunately, I was there to beat the looters' asses into a fine pulp."
Somebody teach Junpei how to use a button-fly.
"Why is there so much blood?"
People without an art degree?
We've been over this, Fuuka: she's dead.
"Why does this require a handshake?"
"And I want you to know that I won't reciprocate."
Now why couldn't she say this far earlier in the story?
"Man, Chidori's a shitty artist."
"Dude, you said that to me."
"Open your eyes." "....Oh, OH. Damn it."
That explains why Junpei had such a great set of tits.
"And her teeth look unusually gritty."
Why couldn't she do this in the bathroom?
Because why break one Link when I can break them all?
I'm pretty sure this s*t*r*a*n*g*e l*e*t*t*e*r*i*n*g is a common thing in Japan.
Uh oh. I think Ken found Brooklyn's meth.
"Either this broom is heavy or I'm disgustingly out of shape."
"I say after attempting to practice in here."
He says in the creepiest goddamn tone imaginable.
"Man, I was a fucking idiot last week."
"You watched Ken spend the entire night chugging milk cartons."
He invented an imaginary friend just so Aigis would stop talking to him.
"Something....sensual..."
"Nobody has a problem with me speaking dog. I'm not hanging out with you 'cause nobody else wants to
"Oh, I seem to have mixed up my notes with Ono's."
"Hei, an't you beautiful, Brooklyn?" (I'll show myself out now.)
"How exactly were they beautiful?"
"I'm thinking of giving deicide a try."
"They just keep coming, man. It's like they're STOCKING the place with easy meat."
Look at that shit and how hit it is.
Oh god, is it in the family?
"Once isn't enough, damn it!"
Is Brooklyn encouraging necromancy? Haven't I made this joke at least once before?
As psychotic as Brooklyn Rage is, I don't think he can EVER compare to Mamoru over here.
"Hopefully, he won't kill as many people as he would have otherwise."
Junpei: a fount of academic advice.
Which means absolutely we have to.
"He's....Brooklyn Rage." http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q9E3VR8Fnj0
"No wonder I feel so horrible."
Wait, doesn't she have a human brain? If anything, she should understand it all too well.
Somebody check her anti-virus. Just in case.
Math's the killer? I didn't even know this game had a killer.
"I'm gonna have to wear a hat for the next month. Thanks a lot, Junpei."
She'd be on suicide watch if her hands weren't guns.
Use computer words. They'll comfort her.
"I hope you won't mind if I thin the herd."
"Please, go back to simply standing in that one spot."
"That is why I must kill myself."
The perfect time to steal back what meth remains.
For some reason, he decided to loot Shinji's shit, instead. Go figure.
"The view up here fucking sucks."
"For the love of god, blow its goddamn brains out!"
"Nope, this view sucks, too."
No! You don't extend the sound!
Guess which word that correlates to. (It's please. I know it's not very clear.)
"What happened to always wanting to be by my side?"
Wait, does Bebe have a sideburn?
Christ, what a judgmental narrator.
"Do you 'ave zee money? I don't want zee biker gangs to come back and terrorize me."
Bark. Bark like the dog you are.
"You told him that a fan does a poor job of hiding this sort of thing."
I think there needs to be another N in there.
"Who knew she used to be so fat?"
You know how some people call their parent's cell-phone after they've died? Well, Mitsuru's insane.
Trust me: what she says after this does not make it any better.
Keep in mind that Brooklyn just walked out the door.
"My intelligent parents are alright."
"Yea, it was kind of awkward when you started breast-feeding them in public."
"Beware the Wild Duck. It will be the end of us all."
HOW FUCKING LONG AGO WAS THAT!?
Are you sure you're using those prefixes correctly?
We need to stage an intervention.
Well, duh, it's the news.
"On this bridge, specifically. What do you stand to gain from it?"
That explains why none of the cars are moving.
"Maybe because I caused it."
The Aigis brand of Supermemo is pretty damn strict.
Wait, is Ryoji a Lunarian? Is that why he's out on the bridge? To look upon the Kingdom he abandoned
You're coming to this realization just now?
Explanation forthcoming in the next set of screenshots. Maybe.
"See that red stuff? That's my name. Aigis."
You mean Pharos grew up? That makes all the sense in the world.
I was originally going to delete this, but look at this carefully. They drew the scanlines in.
You are mine, now, Aigis. Do as I command.
Here you go, guys. Free avatar. Step right up, get your free avatar.
Even as a child, Brooklyn is terrifying.
"Dear god! Her face is hideous!"
Her name is spelled wrong, guys.
Brooklyn Rage didn't develop good fashion until later in life.
They only left her her nose.
"Put a sign on the door or something so I know when this thing's in the room."
Well, her wings aren't attached to her body, for one.
Anybody want to make a Workaholics joke, here? I'm out of my league on this one.
"I'm Mitt Romney, and I support this message."
Yukari's all over this shit.
Fuuka has two daddies, and both of them are racist.
"What about 'mom'?" "Or 'maternal being'?"
"Brooklyn, YOU are my mother! And Aigis is the dad!"
Be careful what you say, man.
Here's to hoping I don't use this in the actual blog.
That has to be a record pregnancy, especially with Shadows involved.
So I was kinda right with that prediction.
The New York Nyx. They will destroy us all.
"But that was a long time ago, before everybody was immortal. Isn't that right, Chidori?"
I KNEW IT! From the very beginning, I knew it!
"You hear me, chair!? There's no way a woman's gonna be president!"
Hmm, now why does THIS seem familiar?
"That is why you must kill me, and this time, it isn't a joke some Lunarian fuck is making."
"You DID have morning sickness all throughout middle school."
Man, what a morose narrator. Want to tell me that nobody loves me or anything like that?
"The crushing depression of death is just too much for him. Try tomorrow night."
What? You mean the disease is like a religion?....Whatever you say.
"Personally, I would prefer zee yakooza, eef you catch my dreeft."
"Time to move onto Yukari, then."
I caught an H in there, you French faker.
You're right. It's 'asta le vista.
"Man, fuck Aigis. I'm worried about my baby!"
"Like, just sneak up on him in his sleep and slowly watch the life ebb out of him."
ap·prise /əˈprīz/ Verb Inform or tell (someone).
"And use the other hand to blow your brains out. THE END IS NIGH."
"It used to be enough, but now..."
"Why can't I be more like Junpei?"
Are you feeling OK, Yukari?
Guys, seriously: stop sending this thread to fictional characters.
WHERE DID THE FIRST FLOOR GO!?
That's as close as I could get to any of the signs, and I still didn't get a good enough shot.
"Turns out dying isn't so bad when Armageddon's right around the corner."
We get it: you read today's update, somehow.
There's still The Answer, though, and I'm gonna play the hell out of that.
Since when did Japan believe in Heaven? I thought Christianity didn't take off too well over there.
Fucking and fighting? Japanese children's shows have it right.
Gotta fuck with her SOMEHOW.
I DARE you to name a context in which this would ever make sense.
Crimson's a substance, right?
And now he is confined forever to the Earth. Death, you are one cruel bastard.
He's not talking about the food.
"She's definitely dead. Won't have HER to wake me up anymore!"
Keep in mind that Mamoru's definition of "taking care of somebody" differs quite a bit from our own.
"And make sure she never returns."
"You don't pay for funeral costs when there's no body to bury."
"They were a big help, really, but they have to die. Too many witnesses."
What is a maven and why should I trust it?
"You've taught me the limits of the human body in ways I never wanted to know."
"I believe that summarizes our characters well."
He wishes to taste all the flesh before deciding what first to consume.
"Wait, why is THIS part censored? The dirty nasty doesn't come until later."
"Tell me, what are those orb-like objects lying on the ground? And why are they tied together?"
"This has gotta be the third time it's happened in this game."
I think it's because he mentioned possessive nutcase Chihiro in that last pic.
"Azabudai Correctional Facility."
"Can we try what you humans call 'reverse cowgirl'? I've heard it's all the rage."
Come on, Elizabeth. It's just far too easy.
With a U, especially this one time.
All by touching his dick.
"And then siphon their blood when they least suspect it."
"Many girls may fellate you, but only I will have the pleasure of touching it."
She was in on it the entire time? That's...terrifying.
You thought I was kidding? She knows. WE ALL KNOW.
"Can we use this toy I brought with me?"
WE'RE TAKING ELIZABETH'S VIRGINITY! THE MORE THAN DREAMIN'!
YOU BET YOUR ASS WE'RE ACCEPTING THIS SHIT!
"But made sure the security camera was on so you could watch it later."
This is literally the first thing that pops up after that last screenshot.
Wait, is "draw a line under" even a thing people say? It sounds so unnatural.
"I want to do it again, but Gramps here simply refuses to get up."
"Does that pharmacy out there sell pregnancy tests?"
Igor's a real protective dad. A "shotgun" type of dad, if you catch my drift.
"And mocks you with its indifference toward your battle."
Wouldn't one be enough? I remember the PS2 version being alright.
You forgot to tell the joke.
What? I haven't seen you wear it once this entire game.
On this screenshot, I collapsed in shame, knowing that I should remember what the left-hand rule is,
"What if I draw a hand turkey?" "As long as it's with your left hand."
Christ, how many suitors does Mitsuru have?
"Do you THINK I've kept track of how many people I've killed?"
Oh, yea, that's not worrying at all.
And look like a complete knob.
"The police have guns and stuff. You think I can deal with that?"
"I've heard laundering is all the rage."
"Just THINK of how easy it would be to plant all those car bombs!"
Only good things can come from this.
After all, it's the first time we've seen any out of him.
"And I dealt with that by skinning their faces off."
"I'll be thinking of you on the chair."
Did anybody else read those "you"s in all caps? No? Just me?....Alright.....
Wait, wasn't Elizabeth pregnant just yesterday? How many pregnancies are we dealing with?
"Koromaru, however, is so very fucked."
"That was always Shinji's thing."
"So that's why I'm making Junpei do it." "WHAT!?"
Holy shit, Yukari, this is NOT the thing to joke about.
See, even Junpei agrees with me..............What?
"It's all I ever see when I close my eyes."
So we're really treating this like a pregnancy and not like some pseudo-possession case? OK, then.
"What was I supposed to do!? Abort it!?"
Is Junpei calling Brooklyn retarded? Damn, that's harsh. Especially coming from Junpei.
You probably should have stuck with Stupei and your mom.
"He wouldn't save any of it for me."
Watch Brooklyn fail this in record time.
"Tell the authorities that the TV people told you to do it."
Brooklyn's got the right idea. This is a bitching spell, AND Yukari's about to die!
And trust me when I say that he fucking FOUGHT for that Sexy Dance. It simply would not get off him.
"That way, when Igor's playing the GameCube version and you're using the PS2, I still have the Xbox.
"I had no idea what to expect from it, visually."
"The day when I'd have to give up this bitchin' sword."
"Forever and ever and ever."
Oh, trust me: I had a reason to re-use that previous joke.
"As you took the belt to her."
This one will be red, and this one will be grey.
The joke here is that the Japanese language doesn't have plural forms.
"Please see Mr. Edokawa immediately if you find that you have herps."
Just sitting here has made you more popular.
Remember what Ikutsuki said so many updates ago?
FINALLY! No more of Mass Murderer Mamoru!
He just realized how many witnesses there are in this ramen place.
"Saying stuff like 'I thought I raised you better.' She thought wrong."
And an end in many others.
"There's already a cinder block on the gas. Just put the key in, and the police won't have a clue."
"I still beat myself up over losing that skull."
"But then the voices came."
Drink every time somebody says this type of thing.
By which he means "the police will stop chasing him".
"There's no way you're gonna catch up to me."
That look...that fucking look...
I THOUGHT I WAS DONE WITH THIS.
Why are you so surprised?
"Really? I'm already pretty aggressive."
Just look at how energetic it is, taking a dump in the middle of an occupied alley.
*sigh* You just can't leave me alone, can you, Chihiro?
At midnight. Suuuuuuuure.
What she doesn't know is that Brooklyn trained Koromaru to respond to the word "attack".
"No, really, I'm completely fine that you slept with those sluts. I have no problems. Really."
"Make them totally jelly with this Sonic the Hedgehog item."
"They're only hanging out with me because nobody else would and Mitsuru's more depressing than me."
Boys don't count at this all-girl's meeting.
Wasn't this an episode of Secret Squirrel?
He says in his VERY LAST SOCIAL LINK.
"The alligator goes on a murderous rampage."
Despite the fact that his eyes and nose are quite a ways apart.
That alligator got screwed over.
"Why was the alligator pink? Was it skinned alive or something?"
"My parents sold off all my possessions as soon as I was born."
You chucked it in a dumpster and watched it all burn.
"You fucked every one of them up."
Because when I think Akinari, six armed balls of anger come to mind.
He just fucking disappears into nothingness. I can only assume Brooklyn spent his Sundays huffing.
The Battle of Dan's Back. Countless lives were lost when Dan's back was turned.
My first instinct was to rage over the romaji, but it gets worse.
This is the answer you're supposed to give, but it's not the right answer.
This is the wrong answer. Allow me to Photoshop in an anime reference I'm sure none of you know.
Haven't we done this already?
"Is it sex? Because I already have three."
"All the bathroom stalls were taken, and you are kind of loud."
"I've never seen you without your belt."
"Let's go to the kitchen and put a bun in the oven."
"I honestly didn't think it would bend that far."
With a U, because Yuko knows how to deceive men's erections.
We get it, Atlus. We're gonna fuck. Again.
There's gotta be a GameShark code or something that will allow me to see what's behind this censor.
"Or until we reach the top floor. Whichever comes first."
"Whether our opponent is a Shadow or an abstract conception, we must be ready."
Japan: where even our news is Japanese as fuck.
"I am projecting my presence into your mind."
Man, Yukari, you've been kind of a bitch, lately, haven't you?
"That was a real goddamn laugh riot, Yukari. Hey, remind me, how's your dad doing, again?"
It was here that I noticed Mitsuru's crotch. What the hell is going on with that thing?
And it was HERE that I noticed Yukari's winter outfit leaves her shoulders exposed to the cold.
"I'd risk falling on the floor like a dumbass."
Even Yukari thinks Brooklyn is retarded? How depressing.
"Who knew a kid his age could commit so many felonies in one night?"
"I am quite pleased with my own imminent death."
"Because usually, it's your mom."
I SHALL WIELD THE POWER OF ALL END TIMES!!!
She spends all day just looking at that fucking tree.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UfO71ntsRKw
Because I couldn't pick "worship of a demonic entity masquerading as the image of saintliness."
He spends all day in that bed, like he's Sleeping Beauty or something.
YOU THOUGHT I WAS KIDDING!?
East God Emi Ball. Japanese Engrish at its finest.
This is definitely going in the blog.
"You'd be wrong to say it, but it could be said."
"We have a shaman. Therefore, we invented magic."
My Little Pony: Centralized Government is Magic.
Yea, I know. I've played Samurai Shodown.
East God Emi Ball is a swear, huh? Gotta remember that.
Thing Balls. It means Thing Balls.
What if I actually wanted to give her the gift, game? WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THAT!?
As if this wasn't unsettling enough already.
"Brooklyn, why do you have this notebook? And what are these names written next to each sentence?"
What does that even mean?
Yugoslavia: come here before you die a horrible death.
You should see the pictures.
It's just pictures of me naked.
Less John Wayne Gacy and more Professor Moriarty.
This is the first Social Link, so I immediately don't trust it.
How incredibly out of place.
"But enough about Koromaru's doggy treats."
Maybe you shouldn't have used two Ls. That's like challenging somebody to a duel in Japan.
"I was just so enthralled in your toned, masculine physique."
That makes all the sense in the world.
Is Ken's Christmas present going to be shame?
"Remember: the punishment for repeat presents is a fiery death."
Damn it, Fuuka, don't fall asleep on me!
"Using that holy water just out of sight."
"I mean, how would I even ask somebody like Aigis out?"
Because it's a good chance to get laid? (That's actually a very real answer for Japan.)
I swear, that text box is going to be the end of me.
Well, there IS nobody around...
"My naked body. Take it. Right here and now."
Man, what a shitty Christmas present, especially given Brooklyn's other addictions.
"Here's your Christmas present: cereal. Merry fucking Christmas."
"...we'd all puke up that disgusting combination of food. Our bodies knew better."
You should be thankful he didn't abduct you and turn you into a slave in his army.
It's OK; you can say "fuck".
"That's the last time I eat an entire pizza in one sitting. My butt simply can't handle anymore."
I'd ask why you didn't bring Brooklyn, but there's a good chance Chihiro would have spotted them.
Wait, isn't this pretty much Yukiko's Social Link from Persona 4?
"Ask IT to cook your damn food."
"For some reason, I'm only bringing this up now instead of much earlier."
"Don't say that. There's nothing more feminine than a keg stand."
"But your heart already belongs to, like, 900 different girls."
"I think very little of you and everyone around me."
"DAMN YOU, SCROOGE MCDUCK!"
"We will this year, though. Just too much time on our hands, you know?"
That doesn't make a lot of sense, Mitsuru.
"Sure, let's lug this heavy-ass heating table around with us just so we can wait in line."
Guess what I end up doing?
"Kotatsu slumber is the number one cause of death in Japan. Remember: kotatsus kill."
A novel so famous that you can't identify it by this quote.
Oh, come on, Yukari, you have to admit that Star Fox joke was pretty good.
"Oh, he's dead? AND WHEN DID YOU PLAN ON TELLING ME, YOU GODDAMN BITCH!?"
Why not buy a new cell-phone?
"We're not allowed back at the morgue ever again because of that."
Which is why every single Social Link is all about it.
She'd probably end up in bed with me if I didn't waste my time on Mamoru the Maniac.
That's why he doesn't get me a single item. Lazy dog.
"And what would YOU like for Christmas, young man?"
Wait a minute, is that Carley from The Walking Dead?
Just look at how determined those eyes are.
I think Chidori has taken over.
"Nothing cheers me up like memories of my dead girlfriend."
"Wow, that's....awkward."
"OK, who's been messing with my dialogue?"
"But enough about my mother giving birth to me."
The letter f must always be in quotes.
"Green sure is sc-OH GOD!"
You're off by one game, Fuuka. Again.
"I don't care about those two people over there. I'm gonna beat your ass, Fuuka."
"Except for that last part. You're gonna have five new buttholes by the time I'm done with you."
"Just put your head on it and tell the enemies that you don't care anymore."
Presumably with the cocoa.
What this screenshot doesn't capture is Hellsing's constant crotch thrusts.
"The doctors still haven't found the other testicles."
Not exactly. It's more...anti-Semitic.
Just for that, dog to the throat.
"Please donate to the Domestic Abuse Fund to end such horrific Christmas morns."
Multiple portraits, Yukari.
"Turns out it's 3. 1+2=3."
For some reason, Yukari's dialogue is echo-y as shit during this scene, and I have no idea why.
"Her physical wounds, anyway. As long as the mental pain subsists, she'll just continue cutting."
Aren't you forgetting about your human brain you mentioned a while back?
"And it is for that reason that my arms are paralyzed. I hope you're happy, Mitsuru."
"We still have to turn you in, Aigis. There's no forgiving what you did."
Not everyone can live The Brooklyn Way.
"Strangle Yukari when her back is turned. I'm quite tired of her mom."
"Also, Junpei, if you wouldn't mind."
Wow, Aigis, your designers were horrible.
[INAPPROPRIATE AUDIENCE LAUGHTER]
"You don't stand a chance, Brooklyn. I made you, and I can end you."
"Why are you reading this thread?"
Somebody tell her that "get a life" is colloquial and not literal.
"I wouldn't even be here if that was the case."
Let's hope this is relevant for The Answer.
"That hair means you're a woman now, Aigis."
"I say directly to the player, as if my portrait wasn't disturbing enough."
"Even you, player and/or reader."
That just leaves Koromaru. Please tell me Koromaru gets one of these.
Hey, look at that! One that actually makes sense.
What the hell is Yukari doing?
"Have you ever noticed how your fingers just...you know....what was I talking about?"
So Aigis is essentially Japanese Pinocchio? I can live with that.
As somebody who actually has a big sister, I can say that no, she isn't.
"I don't know what she's doing with her hands, though."
You, uh...you just keep staring at stuff, Fuuka.
I never said I was OK with this.
"Don't let the fact that you'll have to kill me influence your decision on killing me."
Way to take all the fun out of it.
There's no chance of that happening with Brooklyn Rage.
"There won't be a single moment when you'll be free of my gaze."
"Your first homosexual experience."
Damn...he sure did whip it out.
STILL ONE GAME AWAY, RYOJI.
"Well, yea, but by killing THEM."
"It's your body, man. Why should I care if you destroy it like that?"
"Nyx cannot be defeated, so I might as well tell you how to defeat her."
"I'm still getting inside Mitsuru's pants."
You were all busy reading my opinions on Serious Sam.
"I have come up with a term for this predicament: frenemy."
"Just think of me as your guardian angel. Of death."
Fuck your girlfriends. Classmates are the only ones who get another tier of Social Linking.
Coming to Giant Bomb, Bushwald Sexyface, killing Satan Claus...
"Tina Fey as a stripper? Who would believe that?"
He says with the most sarcastic look on his face.
"Aw, yea, work it, kimono girl. Harder, harder..."
"There's no way I'm letting you leave this building alive."
Man, Junpei, this has to be awkward.
"Assuming, of course, that we even get a year." "..." "Mwahahahahaha."
A.) That's not a yukata. B.) You didn't even spell it right.
YOU LOOK LIKE FUCKING AMAKUSA; THAT'S THE MATTER!
No way THIS could backfire.
"...or I swear to god, I'll shove that hat of yours so far in your body..."
It shows. What the hell are those "earring" things you have on?
"I mean, I'm gonna need a change of underwear, but it was worth it!"
"He also said I can look if I wait for the right time."
"I'll have you know I spent days grooming this stache!"
"Will you put it up on the fridge when we get back?"
Starting the year off on a high note.
"Look at them. They have no fashion sense. Why didn't they consult me about it?"
What a strange word to choose.
"I don't think he had enough time for that before he died."
Don't fear the reaper. That is all.
Wait, why the preview this one time?
That does not appear on any of their character models.
"Why did Superman come to Japan?"
Because people bond by climbing stairs.
"Who would have thought?"
Look back that the previous screenshot and let it sink in.
"You should have brought her back to life before using that move."
Fucking knock-off firearms.
Scarlet Havoc apparently translates to "a fuckton of saws".
Here's a desktop background for everybody with shitty computers.
SO NOT CANON! (Also, what's that Japanese on the far left and upper-center?)
FEEL THE FURY OF SYRIAN SEXUAL ASSAULT!
Well, until tomorrow's update, when they release Maximam Sniper.
Brooklyn immediately puts them on, wanting to feel pretty.
Becuase high heel boots are just the thing to bring into combat.
Well, that was the plan before I found out they nulled slash damage.
THAT'S FUCKING TERRIFYING.
What was my HP BEFORE this?
"What the hell are you doing?"
"I better hope you're not the only one alive when next we meet."
Its weakness is the triangle button.
Yep, that's totally God's Hand.
Unlike the 5 cards, YOU FUCKING GET THOSE 10 CARDS.
Hamlet knock-off or not-oft-used Hank Hill insult? YOU decide!
His true nature revealed.
"DIE FOR ME! I DON'T EAT LIVE PREY!"
"GOOD MORNING, EVERYONE."
Oh, shit, THIS is my other face?
How important this late in the game.
I don't buy it. There's simply no way Brooklyn could be harboring any light inside him.
"With his blood, I am born anew."
Look at that face. He knows. He knows all.
She says super-sarcastically.
"I was just kidding last time. You seriously lost everybody during that boss fight?"
A tower so tall it stretches to the Vatican...somehow.
God's blessing is worth about 30 SP.
Maiko, you traitorous bastard!
There's still a month to complete, and that's just The Journey.
"Well, at least only one of them died this time. Congrats."
Thanks for putting an end to the programming joke, Atlus.
"It does have crystal-y railings, though, so you should be good."
Jesus is a persona? KING OF ALL KINGS, MY ASS.
Tautology the repetition.
The day when all Japanese children are required by law to pass into puberty.
What if I told you that the calendar continues past this point?
Elizabeth: inventor of dognip.
The sexiest Personae yet.
PUNCH JUSTICE SQUARE IN THE GODDAMN FACE.
How many recursive fusions are there?
"Playing sweet horn solos."
"Do you get it? Huh? Ya get it?"
Because there's no kill like genocidal darkness.
"The fact that I'm saying this is just a happy coincidence and not something purposeful."
Just not as cool as Fist Master.
"Would you like to read these pamphlets I have on the subject? Or attend a free session?"
Is everybody in the dorm suddenly hardcore into Jesus?
Take him anyway. Gross out tactics.
"You've made me the happiest girl in the world."
FUCK YOU AND YOUR GLOVES, JACK.
You know, in case you ever needed a level 1 Orpheus.
"Why did you pull me out? It's been months, man. Months."
That rocket fist isn't the only change she's experienced.
A giant fist only makes her run animation that much better.
Where do I even begin? Those lumps she calls feet? The dreadlocks? The lampshade on her head?
Let's go slice Akihiko in half!
It's not the most powerful armor in the game. Isn't that wonderful?
"Acne is young, so technically, you can't sue."
Teach her how to be human.
Whatever the hell that is.
I'm getting this dude. Even if I don't ever use him, I'm getting him.
Yea, maybe it's best that Aigis have it instead of Brooklyn.
"Reflects Zio attacks like you wouldn't believe."
Maiko's way ahead of you, Tanaka.
You mean the end of the world is the one time you DON'T sell stuff at obscene prices? Oh, Tanaka.
"After that incident at the Love Hotel, I have to sit on this donut thing."
Why not have thirteen living dolls lying around?
You thought I was kidding? I AM NEVER KIDDING WITH THIS SHIT.
Just the thing for the police to sell to somebody like Brooklyn Rage.
Is Kurosawa way into deicide? What's with all the gods enchanted into shoes?
So then why does Aigis' Persona just spam Fatal End and Heat Wave?
Perfect for a dog to carry in its mouth.
"He has since escaped. If you see a blue-haired high school male, contact the police immediately."
I done fucked up the Social Links, didn't I?
"So why are you out so late? Preparing for the eternal darkness that's death, I take it?"
TAKE A FUCKING HINT, KEISUKE!
Have Yukari and Junpei switched places over the course of the game?
Given how easily Brooklyn keeps escaping jail, I'm surprised Kurosawa hasn't been fired.
Wait, TOMORROW? What happened to Sundays?
And you haven't even entered the theater, yet.
"You had no idea she was that flexible."
"So stop stroking it in that pocket."
What item? Use the power of your imagination to be utterly disgusted.
"I didn't even know you could get Doctor Shameless around here."
"Such deep, inviting, eyes. And that....excuse me. I have...business...to attend to."
Turns out the reality is far more unnerving.
Apparently, special reports don't count.
It was around here that my characters began equipping themselves out of nowhere.
OK, I can atually imagine this guy performing a sexy dance......Don't read too much into that.
Is it the sword or the flower? You need to be more specific.
I HAVE SEVERE self confidence issues.
"Logically speaking, Chihiro should have killed you LONG ago."
Wait, why would I want to fuse avocados?
Is Masakado an ancient psychic tandem war elephant? Please tell me it's an ancient psychic elephant.
To summon Masakado. How lazy.
"Let my soulless grey eyes just look at you while the narrator says that."
I never did figure out what the "but" does.
That's not gonna stop Brooklyn from trying, though.
"You know, maybe you SHOULD have killed Ryoji. Just sayin', maybe it wouldn't have been so bad."
It's been such a long time that I doubt it would still be sexy.
"What do you have against cultural diversity, Yukari?"
I was going to say something else, but looking at Junpei's eyes, it looks like he's already taken.
Has the entire dorm gone hardcore Christian?
I can still count on you, Fuuka.
"I want to watch it all burn." "Dat's my goiyl!"
Trust me: nobody wants another reversed Link, at least with you.
"What's that, Koro? You sense an other-worldly presence?"
I thought you said you WOULDN'T get mad!
"You are now my pack mule. Accept your reality, Brooklyn."
"Wait, why do I hate men, again? I was on good terms with my dad, wasn't I?"
"Is it about your mom?" "........No........"
"You just sit there, not saying a word, just looking at me."
"WHAT IS AN INDOOR VOICE!?"
Here is what I think of your love, Yukari.
Tanaka wasn't kidding, was he?
"Get me the fuck away from this crazy bitch."
"Well, that's just great. Exactly what I wanted."
"Suck it up, bitch. I heard what you were saying in those last two screenshots."
"The first session is free."
"All you have is underage drinking."
You mean addressing an abstract concept or imagined person? Real simple.
Make her feel like a failure.
It was in THIS screenshot that I realized Fuuka is ridiculously short.
No way THIS could go horribly wrong.
"That's all the time I'll need." "What was that?" "....Nothing."
"And lock the door behind you. Lock it REAL tight."
I think he knows how little I've been using him.
"You been getting your big boy hair?"
"I me-" "If you say something that's even remotely racist, I'm dragging you over this fence."
"Where are they getting such strong weed?"
What? Memory revision? The fuck is that coming from?
Shit. I guess he really WAS brainwashed.
Brooklyn then punches him square in the jaw just to be sure.
Brooklyn Rage's super-power: pregnancy.
"That's it. You better hope you can swim, Junpei."
"To tell the people praying that they have wasted their lives."
"On this exact spot that I am looking at."
Is this even Nietzsche? I feel like it's more Colbert.
She's gotta mark her territory.
"I, too, feel a strong desire to see everything engulfed in flames."
"Even though as a robot, I don't have feelings."
Couldn't be bothered to make a new numeral, could you?
"This will never be relevant ever again."
"Although we will be once the legislation passes."
"I still find your face quite humorous, though."
"So don't count on me to fight Nyx with you."
"Are your children's gifts infected with Apathy Syndrome? Tune in at 11 to find out the truth."
"Why can't it be freeze tag? That would make things so much easier."
"He's part German shepherd. It should be no problem for him."
Uh oh. Koromaru's into it, too.
"From up here, nothing can escape my gaze."
Is that her "oh shit" face?
"You really should do something about it. I think all the fish here have cancer."
Specify which feeling. I want to know if this is heartwarming or terrifying.
That's what we're calling it? Seriously?
"And there aren't any washing machines in this dorm..."
"Don't tell a single soul. I don't want Junpei catching onto my plans."
"So this is where you've been hanging out with that slut Aigis, huh? I mean, wonderful weather."
"Koromaru-kun would never take my Brooklyn away from me."
Is Junpei a narcoleptic? Why is he asleep in all my recent screenshots?
Scratch that. Everybody seems to be catching it.
"Owl is in Hell, and Koromaru has run out of fucks to give."
"...Strega has announced their possession of the Devil's Contract. Will Jet Set Radio save the day?"
She's muttering that to herself, and Brooklyn just happened to overhear it.
You couldn't have come up with a clearer, less clumsy similie?
"And I have no sympathy for the non-believers."
"When I think of how she exposed me to life-endangering circumstances, I don't want to join a cult."
"Wouldn't YOU want to be cursed by an angel to dance forever?"
You. It's you, Junpei, and you didn't even know it.
"What a pain in the rectum!"
Does that mean there's an army of Aigises just waiting to be activated?
"Turns out we didn't have enough booze to get EVERYBODY wasted, so the whole thing was cancelled."
Who is Idaten and why did he leave his sandals lying around in Tartarus?
"Specifically, this one."
"Challenge people to duels and watch them collapse into nothing."
He's such a master, he doesn't even need fists.
What is it with all the recursive fusions in this game?
"I say to you in your prison within the void."
OK, now that's just mean.
In one alternate Columbia, Elizabeth's a dog. Go figure.
"Let's do it on top of whatever the hell this is."
"Which brings us to the subject of tonight's Word: NIHILISM."
"Who knew Natsuki was sporting such a thick bush?"
"I never knew we attended the same school."
Her explanation for this doesn't make any more sense.
"Just to fuck with Olympiads."
I don't think Ken likes being referred to as "it's".
Where were you whenever the hell I first posted them?
"Maybe I should see a doctor. What do you think, first student who walked up to me?"
Huh? Where is this coming from?
"What's that noise coming from the closet?" "Oh, Stupei. Oh, Stupei!"
"An alcoholic dad and a slutty mom? The perfect match."
Are all her Social Links just eating out? Is she the Gourmet Queen?
"Is it customary to expose your genitalia in fast food establishments?"
"Because it isn't for me."
How depressing is it that he can even tell?
For a girl who comes from a rich family, Mitsuru doesn't know shit about business strategies.
"Quickly. While its eyes are closed."
"I thought you were Junpei."
An awkward silence fills the air.
"I just go there to see the time-defying television."
No, and I don't think anybody else does.
"So? What's wrong with that." "Oh....uh....nothing. If you're into that sort of thing, I guess."
I think he just realized that your denial is far too deep to affect.
That's how Brooklyn tells her to go fuck herself.
"Man, fuck Fuuka and the others."
See? Look at that. Free chair, and they didn't bother inviting the others.
"I cannot understand why someone would get so worked up over Alone in the Dark."
Journalistic integrity? What the hell is that?
"What are these strange symbols you have laid before me?"
"Good luck paying now, assholes."
Even though it's a text article.
"Instead, she gives it all to you."
"Why's he taking so long with our damn food!?"
Not so loud. You might alert all two people in the restaurant.
"The only person worse than my mom....is my MOM."
Oh god, Aigis is going Christian on us.
"I'm not quite sure how I know this."
"Don't worry. I will make them admit the truth eventually."
A fact with which Brooklyn is intimately familiar.
Because there's a lot more to anything than just deciding on it?
"So where's our food? We've been waiting an entire day for some noodles."
"Fuck off. It's 1AM and I'm making five bowls of ramen. I'm not in the mood for any more."
Aigis usually reserves that amount for Koromaru, but today, she has to improvise.
He says in the most sinister tone imaginable.
"These findings are courtesy of the University of Deep in my Ass Tech."
You gotta give Brooklyn more time to respond.
Everybody knows that FOX News is in Strega's pocket.
Fuck with him while he sleeps.
"Like impromptu drunken bar fights."
But we both know you're not up to the task.
Look at how gangster that face is.
"I had no idea that you could command the wolves to do your bidding, Brooklyn. The night is yours."
They don't stand a chance.
Look at those faces. Truly, they are full of anger.
"Are you color-blind, Aigis?" "Yes."
"So that WAS a roofie in my drink!"
"Let me take care of them."
"We're real lucky. You don't want to be around when they've been drinking."
They're too busy creating mind tricks, it seems.
She gets her hand bitten in, like, two seconds.
She gets out lucky. Her hand is made of fucking metal.
"One day, though, I shall join their pack. Just you wait."
"It's like my designers just didn't care."
What? Fish? Where's this coming from?
She enjoys the pain. Give it to her harder.
"Take this knife. You'll need it."
Bullshit. Since when has print journalism mattered?
"You know what I'll do if you forget."
"...and my prescriptions ran out a few weeks back, but you know how that is, right?"
The game says as narcolepsy strikes poor Brooklyn.
"Tell me, do I have to bring my own gun?"
I'm shocked, too, Brooklyn.
What you can't see off screen is Kurosawa disguised as a tree.
"He's failing horribly, but the important thing is he's trying."
"Like my third testicle."
"With me." "Nice try, Brooklyn."
This thread, ladies and gents.
Stop it, Mitsuru. I already have too many pictures to use.
"MY SOCIAL SKILLS ARE SUBPAR!"
"Why do you think I end up in jail so often?"
We're fucking doing this.
"Whispering things in your ea-" "I already have, like, 9 guys for that."
For some reason, every time I look at this, I imagine him doing a Dracula "bleh" impression.
"I have a flower AND a feather. Clearly, I'm ready for anything."
The cunnilingus horse. Of course.
Same here, Persona whom it took an hour of hard Internet research to create.
The deadly cheerleader pose.
I think I've found my playing card.
Also obtained Rhyming Skills x1.
"Why couldn't this violent rebellion continue for longer? *cry*"
How about we doze off? I can't deal with this nervous breakdown.
"Where are the samurai in that?"
"We've only suffered nuclear destruction, economic collapse, and who knows how many demon invasions!
What's worse: Mewlie or how the game immediately labels her a cat lady?
Lady, I think your family has been playing a series of extremely cruel pranks on you for 90 years.
"I believe we should rectify this situation, even though you will no doubt object."
When did Brooklyn become a whiny bitch?
"Fuck that old lady and her dumb cat!"
There's a phrase for cat abandonment?
In terms of what? Walking distance?
Yea, Aigis; that changes everything.
"Quick. Let's ride away on that blurry bike texture."
"You just do this religion thing, and I'll look the other way on it all."
"I think we can hump each other crazy in that shrine without Chihiro being any the wiser."
"...what the fuck, Brooklyn?"
"I didn't even know robots could do that sort of thing."
"What are those bumps down there, and why do they hurt so much when I touch them?"
"Let us go outside. I want witnesses."
Man, people can jerk it to ANYTHING nowadays.
Aigis has always been a spring sort of gal.
No wonder Takaya had to settle for Jin.
And not get a stern reprimand from me like I did for you, Yukari.
"Research has shown that looking like a complete dumbass makes you immune to Apathy Syndrome."
"Don't lie to me. I have you on camera."
"GET OUT OF MY MIND, MYSTERY CAT!"
You mean Aigis can speak cat, too?
"Could you repeat that? I couldn't understand your thick accent."
"I didn't know you were a furry, Broo-" "Tell a single soul, and I'll rip you apart."
"I only had my 43 other cats to keep me company. Those were dark hours."
"That is one 'lonely' old woman."
"Turns out my designers forgot to program a dictionary into me. Is there anything they did right?"
"You can thank that socialist Muslim in the White House for that." "But we're in Japan."
"What were the designers of that dorm even thinking?"
Somebody call Chris Hansen or something.
"I had good results for the 3 years I spent on the run."
"To make typos in broad daylight..."
Take her into that blue hallway nobody ever goes down.
"That only one of us is leaving this mall alive."
Brooklyn needs to teach her better than that.
"After staring at her in disapproval for half the Social Link."
"Until people realized it was just a BB. Then they broke out into laughter until he left in shame."
"I hear it's good luck to have sexual relations at this shrine."
"I was trapped in one of those revolving doors all day and had no idea how to escape that nightmare.
"Did you go in the holy water, like I told you?"
"Did the feminists get to you, too, Brooklyn?"
"He sure was laughing a lot during Saw III."
Just show us where on the doll he touched you.
"Punch those flashbacks square in the jaw."
"Why didn't we do this when this line would have made some damn sense?"
Pulling out all the stops for Bebe, aren't you, game?
"Episode 48: Parallels! Turns out this shit has been an allegory for the game proper."
Nietzsche rears his mustached head once again.
"All of my friends have been taken up by the cult. Every last one."
Wow, way to misinterpret my statement, Yukari.
Nobody tell him the truth.
"Man, being dead must be a real blast."
Good thing I'm not taking you into the final fight, then.
Then why not just look in a mirror?
"Good to know I was right."
"...Uh...Xilka, Besa....Besa...(Damn it, how's the rest of that go?)"
But sometimes, it's the best.
"Must...kill....Edogawa..."
"Turns out they adopted it all from China."
You really like to state the obvious, don't you, Edogawa?
"Well, at least when she remembered which was which."
How does he know what Aigis and Brooklyn were doing that night at the shrine?
Well, two out of three isn't bad.
"But it tastes kinda salty. What have you been eating?"
"Truly, it was a better time."
Somehow, these are related.
Remember when Atlus tried to Americanize the fuck out of the Persona 1 script? Sadly, I do.
"Atlus was very clear on this: no Japanese names in the American release."
"I wanna have the squirts like there's no tomorrow!"
"I, too, wish to experience the squirts."
"I've seen your wanted posters all across town!"
Hopefully, I don't see more of him after this.
The narrator still calls him Kiyoshi.
That face just completes it.
"Because her apartment smells like Polygrip and cat pee."
"If not, then she will have to die alone and afraid."
Social skills? What the hell are those?
I agree, Aigis: Beauty of Destiny is a pretty bitching song.
"To blast other people?" "Quiet, Brooklyn."
"I'm not quite sure if your genitals are worth shooting off."
She has the right idea: leave this guy behind and never mention him again.
"...because I can totally do that..."
Actually, Aigis, they're quite usual.
Wait, what? Where is she getting this information? Did she stroke his hands between these updates?
Oh, sure, it starts off all fun and games, but soon, you're getting all these judgmental looks.
Then why is its attack power so high?
"What food do you think we should try here?"
"Trust me. I looked up and to the right."
Well, I will, at least. I can't say much for the rest of you.
"Twenty minutes, and we haven't even SEEN a waiter. What kind of restaurant is this?"
"Becuase I think it's Adam and Eve, not Adam and Steve." "....What?"
"It's the only way she'll stop stalking me." "Which one?"
"Us Kirijos killed our emotions back in '74."
"Do you know what Noba blood does to my growth rates? Through the freakin' roof."
"They sure did show it in a funny way, though........."
"I can accept that sort of thing from Junpei, but from YOU?"
Or at least he pretended to.
She's having Kurosawa comb through your arrest records.
It takes the entire game for somebody to notice, and it turns out it's the dog. Brilliant.
Now they're gonna find out it wasn't Junpei making those stains.
"Have you been thinking about your future, Koro-chan? Don't lie to me; I have it all on tape."
Yukari doesn't know how dogs work, does she?
"Which room is this, again?"
"It bears a striking resemblance to the ones found in the bathrooms."
Yukari then grows an extra, ten foot long arm and goes on rampage as a bad Resident Evil villain.
"Yea, I can speak robot, too. How did you think I knew?"
"You think I'd keep a closer eye on Mewlie after what happened last time, right?"
An adventure that will become th-
Or something needlessly morose. That works, too.
As somebody who has actually had a few cats, I can tell you that she is out of her goddamn mind.
"Yes, I speak cat. What of it?"
No, he only went out in search of death, Aigis. Huge difference.
"I sure am chipper after telling two relative strangers about the death of my cat."
"That's not a word, Aigis." "Guh?"
"You still have your grandson who will never visit you."
Fragile Dreams in a nutshell.
Wait, Mewlie is a girl's name? I'm still trying to comprehend that it's a name at all.
"I'm not a cat whisperer, Aigis."
Why are you getting so philosophical about a damn cat, Aigis?
"Become a human. And the only way I can accomplish that is to devour human flesh."
"May I please eat your flesh?"
"I mean, what's wrong with me? Aren't I good enough for Mitsuru-senpai?"
Now Yukari's the better character. You don't have much time left to get your act together, Junpei.
"In fact, I had to pry your hands away from her heavily bruised throat."
"Should I correct that?" "I think you know the answer."
"Yes. We had this entire private conversation just to fuck with your mind."
"....What the hell am I looking at, exactly?"
So says Doctor Yuri Lowenthal.
"Just danger of her dying in two weeks."
"And why do I feel such a seething rage in the pit of my stomach?" "Don't worry. That's natural."
"Only now, a couple of months after I died, do I reveal my last name."
"How does Chidori Iori sound to you?" "Terrible. Why do you ask?"
"Uh, doctor, I'm right here. I can hear everything you're saying."
"And stomach pumps and rehab..."
I might as well address it here: she sounds like a completely different person.
"It was the most disappointing dream I'd ever had."
Fuuka, did you drag Chidori's corpse back to your room for your own nefarious purposes?
"......*gasp*! COULD IT BE THIS ROOM!?"
"Can somebody tell me what's going on, instead of speaking like I'm not even here?"
"Man, were the other morticians pissed. I was almost fired for severe malpractice."
"No. Don't be ridiculous. That'd be the stupidest way to for somebody to come back."
"WHAT ARE YOU PEOPLE TALKING ABOUT!?"
"Or are you talking about some other girl who farts zombie flowers?"
"Did you...cut off your hand?"
"Do you even know where it is, Stupei?"
For some context, he asked her "How do you want to live", not "Do you want to live".
'[RANDOM FRAGILE DREAMS QUOTE]" "Oh dear god, whose idea was it to bring Aigis with us?"
"Will somebody escort the douche-y looking one out of here?" "You heard her, Mitsuru."
"Too bad it didn't really happen in this room."
Hell if I know; we spent the whole day focusing on Junpei while Brooklyn presumably did jack shit.
"The Simpsons Movie...it's something else, ain't it?"
Says the FITNESS EXPERT ON THE FUCKING NEWS TEAM.
"Prepare to shed those unsightly pounds right off when you spiral into crippling depression!"
Says the girl who surv...was in a zombie apocalypse.
The only fusion spell I accidentally discovered.
"I'm not even a special Persona, but I still get a special phrase. Suck it, everyone else."
"Wenn du lange in einen Abgrund blickst, blickt der Abgrund auch in dich hinein, Herr Brooklyn."
Gives birth to a Hindu deity, somehow. Go figure.
"Keep that damn box away from me, man."
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY RECURSIVE FUSIONS!?
Apparently, the Lunar Heavenly Messanger is a frigging robo-angel. Makes sense.
I want to say it's glorious, but the hell's up with that bowl cut? THIS DOES ME NO JUSTICE!
Oh, fuck you, Persona 3. Fuck you in all the areas that are fuckable.
"Well, I WAS until my fucking 'daaaad' got sick on us."
"It affects more than your genitals. Did you even know that?"
"I'm the only teacher you can trust. Remember that."
We saw it coming from a nautical mile away. You deserve all the looks you get.
Bone + Jesus = HOLY HELL, THOSE FUCKING STAT BOOSTS!
Why the cartoony hair? And everything else?
Somebody put her on suicide watch, quick! I want to be there when it happens!
He then knocks Brooklyn back into the infinite void I apparently captured in this screenshot.
Fun fact: more students have killed themselves up here than have graduated. Well, more grim, really.
You don't have to tell Brooklyn.
More times than any of us can possibly count.
"I don't care what you do with other females. Honestly. It does not bother me in the slightest."
"I can't imagine all those whirring fans and belts would be safe for humans to touch."
"But in a JRPG, I'm the manliest looking character out of them all."
Is that why Yukari's the only girl to reverse with me?
Try explaining that to Chihiro. Or Yuko. Or Elizabeth. Or Yukari. Or any other female character.
"She's muttering really fast, and her body's shaking a lot."
"You watch domesticated animals trap Aigis in a circle, refusing to help her out of this scenario."
"So far, none have objected to my presence." "How many knew you were there?"
Somebody get the Blue Fairy up in here.
"Would you like to hear it again?"
Good luck trying to Photoshop urine into THIS.
"Because everybody else found out."
"You decided to walk home and let Yuko go back to her sleepwalking."
Pounding 'em down, I imagine?
I'd still like to hear her try.
"On that clock that is clearly visible from our current angle."
"I really should get rid of those security cameras."
I think I just gave her that creepy hair doll.
"Is it just me, or does my hand smell fuckin' delicious?"
"That's how you get in bed with the ladies."
"A lifetime of depressing masturbation awaits him."
Did somebody mix up Kenji's dialogue with Fuuka's? Is Fuuka gonna condemn the feminists soon?
Given what happened last time, I doubt that's going to happen again.
"Then stop going to church."
"I just can't stand another second working with all these fucking teenagers. You know what I mean?"
"Something about Japan never really accepting Christ or some other hogwash."
If ever I needed a screenshot to summarize Japan, I'd probably find another screenshot.
How? You don't have a computer or papers or anything.
"I'd like to phone a friend." "That joke is 12 years too late."
Wait, didn't this exact same thing happen at the beginning of Persona 2?
"Otherwise, join the circus or something. I don't really care."
She's saying that from experience.
Is she hitting on Brooklyn? I like where this is going?
"All the horse steroids I've been downing."
The rewards of a friend's death.
You want specific reactions? Go fuck yourself for having such high expectations.
"I can't hold my liquor very well."
"I mean, I can expect that sort of thing out of Ken, but Akihiko?"
Nope, not awkward or overly forward in the slightest.
"But now, I am far less logical."
"I had absolutely no feelings for you. Your delusions are your own problem, Brooklyn."
"I think Death left some stuff behind in you."
Maybe stop putting it in quotes and you'll figure it out faster.
That is why I will play The Answer.
"Anything to get back at my mom. Wait, whose script is this?"
That's not an "I'm not wearing any underwear" face. This is gonna be weird.
Not really. My old school had a pretty good rice ball program.
Somebody explain sexual harassment to poor Fuuka. (And how this joke is supposed to make sense.)
"But that redhead said we aren't allowed to pee indoors."
"Get this clingy bitch away from me, man." "What was that, Koromaru?"
Even Animal Planet. "Strega's Call. Also, Cats and Shit."
"Sometimes, the two cloud textures swap places."
"But many of them are incredibly similar."
"I KNOW, AIGIS. I. KNOW."
"Alright, enough practicing. Time to say it for real."
"Believe me, I've tried."
Because if you could be touched, you'd have a thousand sisters filled with infinite shame and regret
"Even when I close my eyes, you're all I see. WHAT IS HAPPENING!?"
Aigis REALLY needs to stop touching herself.
"After her confession of love, you can feel Aigis' strong feelings towards you."
"Your hugs suck, Brooklyn."
"They've already taken pitchforks to our cameramen and are demanding their souls back."
Akihiko's a lot like an idiot, in that he's an idiot.
Believe me, I'm surprised I can make so many jokes, too.
Damn, Yukari. You cut deep.
Apparently, Plato's ideal is +10 to all stats.
Is it objectification if the woman in question is literally an object?
The narrator doesn't like watch teens fucking. It reminds him of all the opportunities he's missed.
Well, at least she's prepared in case a fire breaks out.
"More confused. Why do you need so many tops but only the one skirt?"
You mean all those bullets aren't heartwarming?
"I'm not your first, am I?" "*burst of laughter*"
"I can do things to you they can only dream of."
"But then I realized the greater the differences between me and Yukari, the better."
How to fit her fist in her mouth.
This better not be fucking terrifying.
"Chihiro ain't got shit on me."
Forever and ever and ever.
She just remembered what happens when Brooklyn enters a room with a girl.
"This $.05 burnt screw means the world to me."
I think I'm a better person for not knowing what kinky sex act she wants to try with Brooklyn.
Do I even need to add anything to this? It's unsettling enough as it is.
It's basically Takaya if he was much hotter.
"Did you bring a condom? Because even robots can get pregnant."
"Wrap your hands around it and squeeze as hard as you can. IT TURNS ME ON, BROOKLYN!"
Apparently, her creators just put her brain in there for shits and giggles.
"I came up with the name myself........I'm guessing that look means I shouldn't have done that."
"But I see no harm in trusting it around somebody quite literally named Rage."
"Ram your finger in and twist it. I WANT TO FEEL THE PAIN."
Exposing highly sensitive equipment to oils and dead cells? What could possibly go wrong?
"How is this going to work? This angle makes no sense."
Be glad that I couldn't capture her guttural caterwauling in this screenshot.
No way THIS could backfire.
Is somebody taking pictures of this? Besides me?
What's the opposite of premature ejaculation? Because Brooklyn has it.
"Come at me, bro. I'm made of fucking metal."
THIS IS NOT WHAT I WAS PROMISED. (Also, I don't think I've ever heard of that Shining game.)
"Eh, the world's ending this Sunday, anyway. Why bother fixing past mistakes?"
Was the Captain N version of Pit part of the localization team...icus?
I didn't know the Pope was called Metatronius.
Setting the bar low, are we?
Said in the most needlessly bitter tone imaginable.
"Hahahaha, what a lonely bitch."
Where is this coming from, exactly?
Well, I have to imagine a motorcycle would fuck up hair that long.
"I thought I saw something."
She's referring to the motorcycle. Given how nobody even remembers it, I'd say job well done.
His username is Tatsuya, so it's obviously yes.
"...I must adhere to the stereotypes of our people."
"In other news, the police fucking suck at their jobs."
Koromaru has run out of fucks to give.
Well, except for that whole Nyx thing.
"For the love of god, get me away from her. I'm fucking begging you."
"THIS ISN'T WHAT I MEANT, ASSWIPE!"
"JUST THOUGHT I SHOULD REMIND YOU GUYS OF THAT."
And Fuuka spends this time just running around in circles like a dumbass.
This is what happens when you dump all your stat boosting items into one Persona.
What astute powers of observation, narrator.
She's not convinced that the library doesn't serve food.
Mind lending some of that power to Brooklyn?
"I say we split the money between ourselves and tell the rest to suck it."
Rather, created from the scraps of Mamoru's victims.
That's good for business, right?
Fuck the end of the world. We're going on a journey of self discovery!
"The world is ending, but that's still no excuse to see some floozy behind my back."
Apparently, Aigis and Koromaru don't count.
Because Brooklyn is a psychic wizard who can control people's emotions directly.......Is that it?
"The rich get richer and the poor get children. How're ya feeling?"
And then promptly get arrested.
And it was here that I noticed what the hell's going on with Asura's crotch.
Gee, where could you have gotten THAT idea?
Too bad I can't go there and see it for myself.
"Because I have no faith in our ability to succeed whatsoever."
"Fuck logic! I'll do what I want!"
Does anybody understand how mind wipes work?
For tomorrow's update. (This would work well if this was actually the last picture.)
"Just sneak up behind him when he's not looking, and then plant the knife in there."
httpwww.youtube.comwatchv=WBUEZ1Q30xk
"We're coming for you, Namatame! Or is this The World That Never Was?"
Yea, that blog sure was...something...
"Is that how child birth works? I had no idea."
Fuuka hasn't been paying attention to a damn thing this entire game.
"Sorry that I had to get so close, but I AM nearsighted."
Guess what happens? (He never shuts up.)
I know you're not finished; I saw your HP bar.
"Let's leave him be. It IS past his bedtime, after all."
"You know, I have this brochure for counseling on abusive relationships..."
"It fucked up my eyes pretty bad, which explains the glasses."
And he told every judge in town that they shouldn't even bother.
"Sir, 97 children died as a res-" "DON'T STOP FOR NOTHING."
"In retrospect, that probably explains why he was such a bad planner."
You better hope they're weak to Agi.
"He does realize they reflect Agi skills, right?"
Poor Takaya. Did Nyx reject your sorry ass?
After fighting him, I can say for certain that he doesn't.
"That is why I wish death upon everybody in this world and destroy the moment."
"Do you even understand your own motivations? Huh? Do you?"
Well, apparently, Junpei doesn't, either.
You're not fooling anybody, Fuuka. We all know the REAL reason you've been missing school so much.
That Kirijo guy certainly can.
And that is why you fail.
Well, unless they're stabbed or something. Then they die pretty quickly.
"There's no way you can be my mother!"
Is Aigis going to betray us?
If Nietzsche was still alive, he'd probably be diving in a giant pool of royalty money.
Guess what happens at the end of the game?
"We'll see who can sprach the most Zarathustras."
"Sorry, I just....I just remembered the funniest joke...hahahahaha."
"WHAT WAS THAT DUCK DOING THERE IN THE FIRST PLACE!?"
Have fun sleeping tonight.
Man, what a badass battlefield. Almost looks like something out of the first Persona.
Takaya's character model sure is a lot more mellowed out than his portrait ever is.
"What are you looking at?" "Nothing, baby. Why do you have to go there?"
That's for 80 hours of looking like a gecko-eyed Jesus.
"Did you honestly think the hand of God would do a damn thing to this svelte body?"
Guess who's destined to win?
The guy who can actually perform All Out Attacks, that's who!
No, no, you're still in this.
"Somebody get this man on his feet so I can drive this sword deep into his spine."
Apparently, religion works the same as parenting a six year old.
Says the topless guy with the Ed Hardy tattoos.
Notice how she's tilting her head up to look at something she could clearly see, anyway.
"Who's the asshole who decided to play on European Extreme?"
Why does this look familiar? Like "fighting game final boss" familiar?
What's going on with Koromaru's face? It's like somebody mashed his facial features deep in.
Who knew Ryoji's upskirt looked so damn...terrifying?
Well, yea. We spent an entire month establishing this.
"Let's just repeat this filler dialogue for the rest of the feature!"
"I think these statements make perfect sense together!"
"Do you know what 263 floors does to a girl's legs?"
I was going to say "And kicking it square in the balls", but then she had to close her eyes.
Prepare for the longest badass boast imaginable.
"Those Pokemon cards aren't worth a cent, so stop holding onto them."
Prepare to hear THIS a lot, because I certainly did.
"Or strange metal clothing and buttwings. Whatever works for you, I guess."
So the final boss is essentially Hyne from Final Fantasy III?
Are you sure that's what you want to tell Brooklyn?
What it looks like when Nyx actually changes Arcana.
"Because I'm about to rip it all apart."
Is this what you have been telling me about The Answer?
"So remember to thank your physics professor, whoever the hell that was."
And shock and a host of other confusing emotions.
You guys DID warn me about charm, after all.
Why are you talking about blessings now, of all times? Aren't you going to wipe out the Earth?
"And then ignore it. Figure it out for yourself."
"Clearly, none of you are up to the task."
Because fate never has anything nice in store for anyone anywhere.
I still have tons of Personae with Super Mega Death Fist moves.
Good thing I got that Rocket Punch.
"Believe me, my victims have taught me this lesson all too well."
"That's your Terrible Chinese Lesson of the Day. Tomorrow: nothing, because I'm destroying all life.
Let this be the last time he/she says this.
Suddenly, Robert Frost becomes a lot darker than initially intended.
"Unless you're Aigis, because apparently, she's immortal."
"This surprises me, for some reason."
Nyx's thesaurus is fucked.
Oh, I guess that means "cover myself with my buttwings."
Hasn't it always been that way?
I think that band name is taken.
"For dry, red eyes, Clear Eyes is awesome."
Don't look up to me. I'm not helping you.
Of course not! There's a second form immediately after this.
One last shot for posterity.
"When was the last time you saved? I bet it's been a full week."
"Screw this, I'm outta here."
Finally, a face that doesn't look like ass.
Between Aigis and Mitsuru, there are three faces in this cutscene.
Oh shit, is this The After Years all over again?
Will she ever have a face that isn't fucking horrifying?
Wait, how did Durarara make its way in here? Was it because of that one joke I made 100 updates back
You're gonna lose an eye if you keep this up....whatever the hell you are!
Did their eyes sink back into their skulls?
"And the candles....oh man, I didn't see THAT coming!"
"How much do you think the budget for the art was? Two, three dollars?"
He died as he lived: violently shitting out his internal organs.
'Twas the best shit of his entire life.
Turns out I was wrong a few pictures back.
"A couple lines, a pink baseball diamond...yea, let's call it a day."
Are those lines at the bottom supposed to be his nose?
"Are you sure you want to wear such a short skirt in the middle of January?" "Shut up, Kazushi."
What's Chihiro doing here? I'd have thought she'd be at Tartarus "with" Brooklyn.
"I thought I gave up the hooch. Why are you still here?"
"If I was a better police officer, I'd probably be looking for crime instead of at the moon."
She just realized how ill-dressed she is for January weather.
"Why did I decide the end of the world was a good time to get high?"
"These shrooms have to wear off SOME time."
"Hey, wanna fuse some Personae before the fi-" "You're late, gramps. Way late."
Meaning there's all the reason in the world to worry.
"Allow me to correct that."
"Nothing beats the sweet music of hundreds of voices screaming in unison!"
Maybe share the coke with everyone else before you snort it up yourself, Igor.
"I want you to see their screaming faces."
I wanted to capture him raising his arms up, but then this space tear ruined the whole damn shot.
In the form of this ball of energy.
Even though Mamoru is all the proof you'd ever need against the existence of God?
Difficult? I fucking plowed through half those Arcana she pulled out.
"I started going to a therapist. Maybe HE'LL know what to do about her."
You don't know Brooklyn. (Why does that sound like the name of a game show?)
How do these people learn so much from somebody who spends his free time lighting fires?
"Imean,Idon'tknowwhatI'ddowithoutyouI'dprobablytakemyownlifethatdoesn'tsoundcrazy,right?"
"I'll be busy down here, making sure none of the other girls get in the way of our reunion."
You don't even know if he's a he....OK, you do, but you know what I mean.
"You're seeing it, right? The end of the world?"
"End of the world clearance specials! WOOOOH!"
"I know how to use a knife. You taught me that."
"Kick 'em in the nuts and kick 'em some more while they're down!"
All the pictures of Brooklyn you Photoshopped on your computer?
"And what a scam that is."
Trust me, it was a pretty friggin' good fight.
He taught that to everyone, old man. You're nothing special.
"Everyone's so scared of that Nyx thing; it's super easy to sneak up behind 'em, slit their throats.
"Ham AND Jesus? What was I thinking?"
Not like the kid who still spills things on his shirt over here.
So do we ever figure out what this is about?
"Wait, what am I doing here? Aren't I already dead?"
You always learn the best lessons from a convicted felon.
"Let's watch it explode."
As opposed to all those times I used that strength for extra EXP.
Clearly, the best card in existence.
Liar. I've played Persona 4, old man. You've been holding out on us all.
Or both, as turns out to be the case.
"I'm gonna abuse the shit out of this!"
Well, except losing the next battle. That's quite impossible.
Wait, this elevator was going somewhere?
"And that's why I cut the brakes to this here elevator!" "....You what?"
Can never have too many padded walls in an elevator.
What happened to Elizabeth's eye? Or Igor's everything?
The Dark Hour draws near...during the Dark Hour. EXPONENTIAL SPEED.
What is he facing off screen that leaves him in such shock?
"Follow the pretty light."
In case you can't tell, he's floating into the Ameta Sagiri up there.
"What is going on with her eyes? I can't even tell what emotion that's supposed to be."
"I can't see shit in here."
Any animation experts want to turn this into a 2001 reference?
He's gonna be floating in this void for a while.
"How did I get upside down?"
The final boss: an egg thing...what?
In a bathing suit. NOW YOU KNOW.
THERE'S NO STOPPING THIS RAGE.
Well, this presents a problem...
No, nothing. I barely even used you, Ken.
"Because what the hell could I do? He used me even less than Ken."
"Fuck the themes about life being precious and whatnot! I want to die!"
So Galuf facing Exdeath, with a hint of Zeromus and Giygas? Got it.
"Join me, everyone! Join me in ignoring the themes!"
What can you do? I think you're the lowest level character I have.
"Death ain't got shit on me."
Never a more inappropriate time for your Neo-Nazi tirades, Koromaru.
"I just hope against hope that Brooklyn agrees."
Good thing Nyx allowed you enough time to change into your school uniform before killing it.*
"What are we doing in Final Fantasy V?"
Weren't you just listening? When did you guys choose to ignore this thread?
"Please tell me your hand puppets survived this ordeal."
"How could that bastard die twice on us?"
"Turns out it wasn't necessary."
Maybe because you don't have a single elemental spell to your name?
"Get off that dick and back to your job, MOM!"
The hell is everyone looking at (Yukari not included, apparently)?
Well, too bad. You ignored this thread, and silence is your punishment.
Says Pharos, whom none of them could have ever met.
"My god, it's terrifying. It's like Ben 10 wants to kill me."
"Other universes may vary."
"But don't worry, I won't forget about you. Who knows? It may happen before you wake up."
Meaning I'm gonna play The Answer.
I thought she already did.
"Just promise to name it after me."
AIGIS MUST DIE. SHE MUST FEEL THE PAIN OF A THOUSAND NEEDLES.
Hopefully, the last "these faces suck" pic I have.
Tartarus falls at the hand of Jesus...What's that thing in the lower right? A dog floor?
Even when it's good, Koromaru's face looks kinda crap.
Everybody's a lifeguard at Gekkoukan High.
Aigis, your invisibility cloak is malfunctioning.
THERE! She just realized it now.
This patterns looks familiar as shit. Anybody know where from?
"Man, you guys disappoint me."
LOOK AT HOW DETAILED THAT CLOSED EYE IS!
"Those old guys were right. It IS fun to watch a woman cry!"
"I'm not falling for it, Junpei."
Because I never made a Persona 4 thread?
Metal Gear Aigis: the hardest game in existence.
You tell me. I don't get this memory wipe thing, either.
In this alternate universe, Aigis has a dick.
Count the number of women on screen.
"Is she a burn victim or what?"
"And then there's that Ono freak."
Don't worry. Brooklyn's got Ono covered.
"Medieval knights oughta fuck with his mind."
"Fucking Yukari, man. If I hear one more thing about her mom..."
"Because younger sisters just aren't that fuckable." "......WHAT?!"
Says Not-That-Female Student.
"...nobody would notice the pain in my heart. *sniff*"
Everybody's an baby from time to time. (There was another typo here, but I failed to capture it.)
That explains why the Social Link was all about you.
"You'd think I'd have taken to the bottle YEARS ago."
"And that's why I only have the one kidney."
What else could it be? A coconut? An abstract concept?
"I, too, doubt whether the things communicating with me are people."
A tautology called repetition.
"What bullshit is this!?"
"YOU WILL DIE ALONE AND CHILDLESS."
And yet he stays far longer than he should.
"How did you get that pocketknife past the metal detectors in the first place?"
"How could somebody eat that much Domino's in a week?"
Turns out she's not a fan of slasher porn.
"K....kl...kl....." "It says 'Verizon'."
"When's the last time you cleaned this thing?"
"What a cha...how many girls did you send this text to?"
"They're called words, Ms. Toriumi. They're how people communicate."
"A moose and a G-string? Implausible!"
"This shame must be shared with the world!"
Fun fact: Brooklyn sent me these screens himself.
Weren't you doing that, anyway?
Are you SURE you want to say that around Brooklyn?
"Guess who brought a Spear of Destiny with them."
You broke her, Brooklyn. She's finally gone off the deep end.
He's a silent protagonist. The hell did you expect?
"My Little Pony has changed. My. Life."
I LOVE YOU, TORIUMI......Uh....
"I like to be wi-" "-ned and dined before you're fucked. I've heard it all before."
"To hell with this imaginary rod I'm holding!"
"I had that student arrested, anyway. Awesome, right?"
"Something's clearly wrong with Japan if they still let me live here."
Hidetoshi the Neo Conservative.
"Boy, was I wrong. That night in jail really opened my eyes."
Because look at all the good it's done here.
How did you know? Bwahahahahahaha!
I love that the game knows me this well.
You know it. Wait, actually, you do know it.
"Where did you find the money for such a huge cake you could pop out of naked?"
And according to Persona 4 Arena, that's exactly what happens. Presumably, she reacts with suicide.
THROW THAT SHIT OUT IMMEDIATELY.
It's written in blood, but it's hard to tell whose.
"Seems you called me on my bluff."
Since when could the concept of good ever apply to somebody like Mamoru?
"Do you know how hard it is to get another dog spine without the cops finding out?"
"Until I found out just how far you can stretch human skin. Now I'm into track and field."
Coated in the blood of the maternity ward.
What's worse: the game showing me said smile, or his boss condoning these illegal activities?
"There used to be more, but now I stuff my pillows with their brains."
"Sometimes, you just have to get your hands dirty. With the fecal matter still lying in the corpse."
"They're all gonna have to die soon. Every single last one of them."
Hopefully, not like Chuckles on the right.
"How can you forget all those children crying?"
"WHY WON'T THAT FUCKING BITCH JUST DIE ALREADY!?"
"I know where to get piano wire."
"Aren't we already dating, though?" "......Oh, uh, right. That."
He's crossed your heart several times already, Yuko.
I have Asura to prevent just that.
And he'll just cheat on you all over again.
WHY DIDN'T WE DO THIS DURING THE ACTUAL LINK!?
"Where would we even GET enough beer for a keg stand?"
That the end quote mark is hanging outside the highlight?
WHAT HAPPENED TO THE WALL!?
"I'm, uh....I'm gonna go do something with this."
"I don't care if you go off wi-" "This all sounds very familiar." "Good."
"I'm sorry, Brooklyn, but you're just too possessive and clingy for me. Hope you understand."
"What? No, I'm not carrying a knife. Where would I even have room for a serrated, 10 inch knife?"
"It was supposed to be a surprise. I guess the slut of a cat is out of the bag."
I now have to question the logic of a dead end alley in the middle of a mall.
"Why didn't I bother carding you once? The police are just a couple doors down."
Maybe I can help read it.
"Why did I go back to them, again?"
"And I didn't bother looking at the caller ID or anything."
For the one day we definitively met.
"It's the day my son died." ".........OK......"
"Why else would somebody like Keisuke even exist?"
"Or it would have been if he hadn't died."
Why was he hanging out with teenagers, then...?
Apparently, horses are known for their health.
"But you'll just have to accept that I am a WOMAN now, MOTHER. That's who I am."
"I had to put my ear REAL close to make sure."
"All with the money I would have wasted on Akinari's college fund."
Fable? I thought it was a novel.
"Good thing you made it so easy."
"Cougars will put out for anything."
Murder advice from an old woman. Sensible.
"I told the judge THAT, too! Still, he wasn't having any of it."
Wait, WAS? Did Maiko die?
"I tried to make sure she wasn't."
She may or may not be a rabbit with bullshit time travel psychic powers.
Even in Japan, elementary school kids have to play those lame fucking recorders.
"Wish I could experience i-" "Yea, real fascinating. Just let me get back to this takiyoki."
"I told you not to tell anyone!"
"You wanna do this, old man? I'll let you guess which pocket has the knife."
I think he already did.........BUT NOT LIKE THAT.
"What about with my fing-*thwack*-Is that how your husband hits you?"
"You hear me!? She's MY wife, damn it!"
"Make it look less Hoarders, you know what I mean?"
In the tree, pa-Wait, I've used that joke before.
"And then she died. Best day of my life."
Since when did impromptu Dracula impressions make anybody smile?
Why here instead of at the mall they work at is another matter.
"That's how I control my anger."
"Like how much food a person can eat before they start sweating it out."
I honestly can't tell if she's referring to Brooklyn or the Gourmet King.
It's just the word "ham" repeated ad nauseum.
For every movie and every time.
Since when did other people in the dorm even watch TV?
"Brought to you by....Tanaka's Amazing Commodities? Journalism is fucked."
"Why we chose to report this live is anybody's guess, Tom!"
"No matter what he does, there's no doubt it's going to be highly illegal!"
In case you though I was being too grim with my Mamoru "jokes".
Maybe he should spend some of it on some prostitutes.
You mean "scum of the earth"?
I wish I could come up with something crazier than what actually happens.
If only more corporations worked like that.
"And those who DO buy, too! You think I give a shit? I just started this conference with a rap song.
What happened to the world to make Tanaka a miracle?
"Let me sing you a number called 'Chow Down on Some Dick'."
What do you expect him to do? Give chase and enter an epic rap battle with Tanaka?
That's not a joke. Japan is still very big on the fax.
"People still use that word, right?"
"(Better hope nobody finds out just how much I've been embezzling.)"
"Not even the 'Brooklyn (Naughty)' folder on my computer!"
There's no way Tanaka sells anything that isn't drenched in slave labor.
Joe Q. Public? The fuck is this shit?
"-given the best that life has to offer."
Watch as Warren Buffet gives his next quarterly earnings report in the form of a rock ballad.
Because it's a screenshot, you dick.
All the porn you could ever desire.
Yet somehow, he's still tired.
"I heard you crying this entire time."
"Turns out robot memories aren't affected by contrived plot devices."
"But I didn't even say anything yet."
"Everyone else...go to hell."
"I am projecting my presence directly into your minds."
"I am...the illest girl in this room..."
Says the girl who sounds exactly like Mitsuru.
"Our faces. They're finally OK."
"No wonder you wear it all the time."
"I don't look like a complete idiot doing this, right?"
What they place on the box.
Versus what's actually in the game.
"I was only awake for two minutes back when I was fighting Ryoji ten years ago."
Sadly, you are his aeon, and this isn't even Final Fantasy X.
"You look ugly when you cry."
"No, seriously, what am I doing? Poking myself in the eye with your hand?"
"Guess who's here to ruin an emotional moment?"
"Koromaru was right. About a lot of things."
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=spjmK_j_GcI
"Gee, it sure is boring around here." "My boy, this peace is what all true warriors strive for."
"Remember when I was actually relevant in these games? Me neither."
So somber that they couldn't bother drawing facial features. Or Aigis' band.
Guess which project he used all his vacation days on?
Could it be anybody else?
You mean the soccer guy nobody bothered hanging out with in the next game?
Anata no, terebi ni....I don't know the rest of the lyrics.
Look at how many people were dedicated to these Links.
Behold the glory of Trimestigumus.
"We also named some spells after him."
Why is that dog thing so embarrassed? Is it the Assassin's Creed mask?
Who let Yukari work on this game?
Is that a door in Caesar's chest?
"So THESE are the people we should blame?"
You'd think one of them would have some artistic talent.
World art? The hell is that?
How did Yumi find the time with her dying dad in the picture? Also, what's Tanaka's daughter doing
HIS NAME IS BROOKLYN RAGE, NOT LOTUS JUICE.
"SOMEBODY FIX MY DAMN NECK!"
I Namba, Yu Namba, He She Me Namba.
And yet all the typos...(And that one time they worked Japanese into the plot and fucked it up.)
Maybe that's why: Jamie Ortiz was stretched too thin.
The only character not to get a Persona evolution.
Athena's not a fan of Katsura.
Where's Akihiko? Or any of the other characters who promised to come?
That's not what it says on the back of the box.
Is that why you guys were warning me?
And so our story begins with Kracko giving us the business.
What happened to Akihiko's eyes?
Or hers, for that matter?
"Let's animate the FUCK out of this single tear!" "Good thinking, Sachi!"
"Oh my god! I'm emo as fuck in this story!"
"Introducing our newest dancer..."
Is the butterfly actually gonna be relevant this time, or is he just here for shits and giggles?
Katawa Shoujo joke #49305820395820395823095823095823098....
Hey, Aigis, remember this? I bet you do.
Which incident? This game is nothing but incidents.
Do you even know what "before" means?
"And I wanted to hear it, too. *sigh*"
"Where did my clothes go, guys?"
In that they actually see.
So I guess The Answer is, "No, the characters will still fall asleep in the middle of my screenshots
Maybe it's best that I just back away slowly from this screenshot...
"Why was Koromaru born in the first place?"
Another screenshot to summarize this thread.
"Give it to me harder, Piggy-hara.....Harder.....Harder..."
"Let the scientists deal with my emotional problems. Watch them suffer."
"Spending my time with you has been the most regrettable decision of my entire life."
Well, yea. It IS a beginning, for HER specifically.
"Just remember to tie Ken down. I don't need another knife in my foot."
You mean it didn't end the second Nyx's crazy ass was destroyed? THAT IS NOT HOW VIDEO GAMES WORK.
Take note of all the judgmental stares in the room.
"How Akihiko would wait for me to stop paying attention and then just punch the shit out of me."
"Boy, are THEY idiots. And this is ME saying that."
Even in his dreams, Junpei is a dirty racist.
You want to know why he's always wearing that hat?
"As much as I'd love to, I'm afraid we can't just kill anybody who lives for the moment."
Then why did you even bother?
And that's a catchphrase.
Oh no! Contrived plot devices strike again!
"Why didn't anybody tell me these shows aired so late at night?"
"Or is my calendar function malfunctioning?"
It's your clothing. It's all off.
"This oughta mess up Mitsuru's day."
"...The T-Virus has finally been refined for military use."
What is the narrator up to?
For some reason, purple text means Aigis. Go figure.
"Maybe we should have brought him to a hospital or something."
"MAYBE WE SHOULD HAVE BROUGHT HIM TO A HOSPITAL."
"I was surprised, too. Normally, people have nightmares of traumatic experiences."
"And I'm in my underwear."
"That is a good analogy, right?"
So things worked out for the best, I take it?
"I REALLY need to clean this place up."
Philemon? How did your crazy ass get in here?
Are you giving her an opportunity to punch Brooklyn in the face? Please tell me that is so.
"FINALLY! SLEEP! Glorious, waking sleep!"
And yet Yukari still knocked on the very clearly open door.
"Was also the day I stopped sleeping. Could the two be connected?"
The one time she has an open mouth portrait.
"Why weren't you down here with us, exactly?"
"And that is why I must kill you."
You thought I was kidding?
What happened to her stats? Or her kickass weapon I gave her?
Oh, I see how it is. They bumped down the stats because loading my previous saves would break it.
"Mosquito Face! Shield me with your dress!"
Making this a stupidly easy boss.
"I say when my health is two points away from death."
"Damn it! I spent three months practicing that power slide."
"Aigis: willing to face anything, kind of attractive, but ultimately a dumbass."
"What's happening to the right side of my face? Did the cable go out again?"
You know how Green Lantern is weak to the color yellow? That's sort of what's going on here.
What the fuck happened to Koromaru's face?
Didn't have the twenty bucks to buy more paint at the art store?
"OH GOD, WHY DID YOU DO THIS?! I AM IN THE MOST INTENSE PAIN RIGHT NOW!!!"
"JUST PUT A BULLET IN MY HEAD AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!"
Better pump up the bass for this awesome moment.
Now you know where Turambar's avatar comes from.
Because otherwise, this part of the game would be really goddamn boring.
"If we lived in Canada, I would make you my bride."
I don't remember THAT happening in Greek myth.
I don't know, Aigis. I just don't have the answers.
I like how the game suggests we play this after The Journey but then assumes we don't know Igor.
"Brooklyn told us much about his androgynous robot girlfriend."
You're gonna get so many punches to the teeth, Igor. I think.
Does that mean Igor is playable in Arena? PLEASE TELL ME THIS IS THE CASE.
I guess only guys are allowed to see the contract in question?
"Is that why I cut the brakes to this elevator?" "......You what?"
The entire backbone of a Persona game.
"Say, do you know what happened to him?" "......" "I guess not."
"Unless they follow the advice on the back of the box. Then they're fucked beyond all belief."
"If you don't, just skip over this part of the Velvet Room."
Yes. Of course it means that.
"Maybe I should see a psychologist. Sounds like a problem."
"The hell's with that outfit?" "Excuse me, Aigis?"
"Come on. Robo-Bitch gets new duds, but ol' Koro's left in the nude?"
And you trusted her, why?
"She also asked us to whip her and go heavy on the dirty talk."
"Because she has trouble sleeping otherwise."
"You don't want to know what happens when people sleep around us. It's all kinds of awful."
"Is THAT how visors work?"
Humanbusters? (Photoshop idea!)
"Which you did by opening fire on everybody?" "That's what protecting IS. Gawl!"
Fool me seven times, shame on you. Fool me eight or more times, shame on me.
She bonds through gunfire.
Look at that: the only screenshot where Junpei's model is hatless.
Time skips: the hot new gameplay mechanic.
So the plot of The Answer is basically that the dorm was built atop an ancient Indian burial ground?
"We're gonna need to go to the bathroom first."
"Do you know what sand does to my motors?"
"Clearly, these doors and stairs were naturally formed over thousands of years."
I thought it was for protection.
You mean you DON'T find sand hilarious?
Not at all. You're going DOWN this time instead of up.
Kill Junpei first. His meat will sustain you for a while.
"Why can't we eat Koromaru first?"
"Junpei MUST die. It's the only way."
"You hold him down, and I'll put the bullet in him."
"Stop speaking French and make some damn sense, woman!"
When did he become Mr. Mackey?
Well, great. Now you're all going to die because her emotions go out of control.
Of course we do. It'd be a weird story if she only showed up for the first ten minutes.
"Because I am incredibly uncreative."
"..................." "What's with the silent treatment? Did he change cell numbers or something?"
"We must follow the robotic examples and do this in the nude."
Is Akihiko going to Hogwarts after all this is over?
"That's not unsettling or scary at all, right?"
"Brownnosing little bastard..."
"Kinda wanted some new clothes, but I guess this works, too."
And then Ken falls in and breaks his eye.
"Turns out Mediarahan has been gimped in this mode."
That's how they explain losing all your badass abilities.
"I guess masturbation doesn't count as exercise."
This is Brooklyn's room. I don't know what's up with it.
"He hasn't wanted to talk to people ever since his sex change operation."
It says that for every room in the game.
Can I watch all those naughty clips from last time? Of course not! Remember: progress was reset.
"Be our guest! Be our guest! Bet you'd like a Saturnus."
I wouldn't be surprised if this was the exact same number from the last time.
"I got's the gambling itch again."
I like how his moveset is pretty much the same, despite 20-ish levels of progress.
Treason Couse? Why didn't he have this weapon back when I briefly used him?
Even in profile, it looks weird.
Look at how Nacre that torso is.
"Which Kingdom Hearts game did I just stumble into?"
The drugs JUST kicked in. What drugs? Who the hell knows?
"Anybody else seeing this?"
In case your party members get tired or anything.
Which means I'm only using it at the exact end of the game because that's how video games work.
So why wasn't Aigis equipped with this super awesome Orgia Mode?
Remember when Tartarus looked like a swank hotel?
Boy, are YOU gonna need it here.
"By which I mean an old ability."
"Insolent Maya, have you been drinking again?" "No, no man, no, I'm.....no, I'm good to drive, man."
Aigis' eyes aren't much better.
"He's only wearing boxing gloves. He doesn't stand a chance!"
"I am also confirming that they are standing in front of some type of door-like object."
We don't know why he loves. He just does.
My entire battle strategy. Sans hands.
"Finally. This iron right arm has worn out its welcome."
An actual black person, Fuuka. Don't tell me Junpei's gotten to you, too.
"That 'somewhere else' may or may not be dangerous."
The Tortoise and the Butt Dragon.
You mean "burning", right?
"I dedicate this sitar solo to your healthy colon."
"It's almost like this was ripped straight from the second block of Tartarus."
My first game over, and it wasn't even at one of the bosses.
"Death is proof of life, right?"
Then why isn't called Overclockicus? Is it because there's already a metal band with that very name?
More like Radiant Historia.
SA-CRI-FICE. SA-CRI-FICE.
"How the hell do we open this thing?"
"I like to put air 'quotes' around words 'at' random. It's sort of my 'only' hobby."
That's not how logic works. That's not how anything works.
That's how people get fired, Mitsuru.
Stop messing with Fuuka's fragile mind!
Well, Yukari's randomly looking at the floor, for one.
So The Answer is pretty much the Persona 3 Clip Show?
Yukari's apparently never watched TV made before 2004.
"Doesn't this remind you of a Nelly song?" "A WHAT!?"
"Nothing suspicious about a group of teenagers randomly looking off in every direction but forward."
"Did I miss the Fursona convention again?"
Says the g-wait, how high is Ken right now?
That calendar that we can all clearly see. Never mind the fact that she was just looking at a poster
"I know I hang out with her a lot, but two things: I'm a guy, and I AM A FUCKING DOG."
Is she just a very mean Elizabeth? Please let that be the case so Brookl-oh, right.
"Not today, though. Today, I practice being blind."
Aigis' hard drive is just a USB stick, so no.
Different weather equals past.
"Is it gay if it's still you?"
"How do people even come here without flipping the eff out in a fit of pure rage?"
Oh. He was talking about Aigis.
"In retrospect, it should have been at least somewhat obvious."
All hail the shopping mall.
"No sign of Brooklyn in Heaven."
The only time we'll see the dorm from this angle.
"We don't know the concept of simply walking around other people."
From what you guys have told me, a lot of bosses waiting to destroy me.
"Just leave me out of all of this."
Guess what happens when Mitsuru's available?
"The people in this thread, for instance."
"It's just so much bigger than I imagined."
Now I don't need to fuse up a brand new Orpheus each and every time!
Who would this be for? (Answer in the very next screenshot.)
"Not very good at killing people, though."
"Whyaren'tIrelievedmaybeIshouldn'thavestoppedtakingmyantianxietymedsdoyouguysagreewithmeonthis?"
Remember: upskirt shots don't mean much when they don't include functioning sexual organs.
The other two are both left-heavy.
I fused her just for the Raging Tiger.
"Dude, come on! You don't say that kind of thing to the ladies."
"I bestow upon you the power of question mark."
"Guess what you get for fucking up a fusion, hee ho?"
"I'll help you in battle, or whatever. You know, if my schedule's open."
Fuuka was a little more...eager...than the others.
"There's no way Chihiro could find me HERE."
You mean the bloody, mangled corpse of the Shadow we just killed?
Couldn't you already do that?
They're officially recycling dialogue from The Journey.
"I think its last name is Amada."
What's he reading? The giant collar he's wearing?
It was before Yukari met Ken. I doubt she could show up here.
If you have to ask, then he won't.
"Uh, yea, we know. It says that on the file we have."
It's the voice that made it for me.
"Could you pee into this cup for us, Ken?" "Are you drug testing me!?" ".............Yes."
"Come back when it's a Persona, kid."
"-be absolutely fucking hilarious."
"And your house was such a dilapidated piece of shit that it crumbled immediately."
"How smashed would you have to be to crash into an entire house!?"
How does that warrant a but?
Hey, Veteran Officer: moms don't suddenly come back to life.
"Sure am wistful about my mom's death."
"Why did HE get to kill my mom with a magical horse and not me?"
".....How am I involved in this kid's tragedy, again?"
Does that mean Metis was out shopping when we were Juneing it up?
"What DID you mean when you were blaming me for all this, exactly? I'D SO love to know."
Why does THIS seem so damn familiar?
Because Ken's character was kind of generic in the actual game and this is making up for it?
"Stop it with the China talk and make some damn sense!"
Is he channeling Brooklyn's energy?
Try walking by the janitor's closet between classes.
"So stop it with the happy family memories, FUUKA." "....I'm sorry?"
More like YOU decided to return to the lounge.....You know what I mean.
And generally just tearing ass.
"And kick them straight in their ovalies."
"I mean, you're not even looking at her."
"What's that door doing there? And when did Yukari grow a fourth head?"
Remember when Napoleon stabbed a bunch of dudes with his delicious couscous?
You know, "Black Shadow" would actually be a somewhat decent rapper/superhero/rapping superhero name
Every member of SEES proceeds to give Ken accusatory glares.
Which Aigis is not allowed to use, for some reason.
"I'll pay you upwards of $700 for this broken piece of machinery."
I'm pretty sure this is a technical term, but I still like to think she's killing people with rats.
So cute, yet smells so much like ass.
"I HAVE SEVERE self esteem issues."
From the long lost Mega Man RPG.
"Don't you DARE say that about my beloved Brooklyn, you whore!"
Now you TOO can be a French knight!
Guess who's here to fuck some shit up?
What's with the Yu-Gi-Oh streaks on that lion?
The best game in the Shining series to date.
Back to the first dungeon, I think.
"I want my drawing to have the best jewelry on the whole fridge!"
Must've been too focused on your bead.
A beard so beautiful that it is worth $400.
She truly does take after Brooklyn quite well.
Fuuka is apparently a Pokemon of some type.
Remember when Akihiko had fans? Me neither!
"This broom MUST be the captain!"
"How did you make his stomach bleed so much?"
"That's how the kids say it, right?"
"Our rules specifically forbid the existence of other schools."
"My portrait fucking sucks."
Why, it's Mitsuru in a slightly different outfit! That's who!
If you thought Akihiko's portrait was bad...
"Wait, since when did I have a Brooklyn accent?"
I think we'd prefer not to know.
"But the cops have been on my ass since pre-school. I need someone with a clean record."
Gekkoukan Junior High really needs an anti-racism rally.
"The Shadows. They are behind the wet dreams you've been having."
"(Has she been watching me while I sleep!?)"
Is Mitsuru going to show Akihiko her boner? This got awkward fast.
A poor looking Mitsuru facsimile?
Funny what a year can do to your entire look.
"Take off them pants, pretty boy."
"Chinatown will be all yours."
That we're going to see Lil Yukari trying to smother her mom in her sleep?
"Akihiko, you said that to me."
"You're not the type to believe in morals or living with others."
"A place dedicated to violence."
She's been at her computer this entire time, writing blogs to compete with mine.
"I'm right here, Fucker."
"Again, I'm fifteen feet away from you, Tupei."
"Bi curious." And then the James Bond theme plays, for reasons I don't fully understand.
"I keep that desk locked for a reason!"
I think that foaming at the mouth means something else, Junpei.
"He takes after Brooklyn like a champ."
Ghosts 'n Goblins, what are YOU doing here?
The only time you'll ever see what's on the other side of this door.
"How many pictures can one guy take of a single game?"
Why am I only figuring out this useful feature just now?
You know, the safest part of a wind storm.
"Your reward for battle: THE VERY ELEMENTS THEMSELVES."
So more like "ice rock". Good to know.
Let's watch Kurosawa pick this up with his bare hands like an idiot.
Since when has anything valuable ever been described as a "lump"?
The alliteration on this thing alone is worth $500!
"The way he'd just ignore every Shadow in sight and head straight for the boss battle."
"Maybe it wasn't the best idea to obey Brooklyn's last wishes and go off my meds."
I see the blade. Where's the shining?
Not really. Just Mitsuru and the dog, really.
Because that's how strategy works.
"I WILL be the Fist Master when I grow up. Just you wait!"
"Oh god....my hands....WHAT HAS HAPPENED TO MY HANDS!?"
It's a save point, Fuuka. You've seen it a billion times.
These three do, though, Fuuka. That's the important thing.
He just spotted a Wealth Hand in the most perfect position.
Looks like we have a third Wild Card.
Yea, that was a cool game.
"Everybody else got a crappy younger portrait."
Why is he looking at me when he's saying that...?
"Wait, this is MY origin story, too? Huh?"
"Pooch? Screw this. I'm out."
It's the janitor's closet, isn't it? That explains why I could never go in...sort of.
"Get that old monk drunk enough and the staff won't touch you."
Heavy drinking to forget dating Yukari? Yea, makes sense.
They're talking about Brooklyn, aren't they?
That's not the racist Junpei I know! What happened, man?
"There's another rumor that he still owns the knife he used to kill them.........Uhhhh...."
"Seriously, Kazushi, pregnant? You guys will believe anything."
I like this guy's thinking.
Do I need to say anything?
Says either Johnny Yong Bosch or Yuri Lowenthal. I can't quite remember.
Never once do they question the fucking dog he's hanging out with.
"Why didn't they let me hang out with them? What went wrong there?"
"I was gonna get plastered, you ass."
"How popular would I be if I could lick the inside of my own knee?"
You had better options? I don't believe you.
How many other alcoholic dogs are there?...How many other alcoholic dogs are there?
"There were only three people at the mall. I thought the city was on lockdown or something!"
"Us robo-gals only stop sleeping for shits and giggles."
"Namely, the death of a close friend has given me severe insomnia. What's your excuse?"
They gave her the emotions later to prevent a horrible tragedy.
The guys aren't hitting on her, for one. I'm not sure which one of you has it better.
"Still not as b-" "If you so much as mention your mother, I'll shoot your eyes out."
"I just have to say the name of the spell and people are immediately confused."
"If you just want to indiscriminately beat people up, go speak with Metis or something."
Most people can't understand Ken.
Why are the robots of this world programmed to communicate in dog? Can Labyrs understand dog, too?
This goes on for twelve minutes. In it all, you can only hear her barely excited breathing.
"It was already a pain going DOWN those stairs blind, but now you want me to go up them, too?"
"Of course, you can speak dog, so this screen shouldn't even exist."
PUT THAT SHIT ON HIM IMMEDIATELY.
"Believe me, you REALLY need to twist that neck to hear him scream."
"Not good, mind you, but better."
Maybe Junpei's gonna be the one to take up Brooklyn's arson legacy.
What a superfluous description.
The market's kinda fickle about floating chairs.
It's also good at shooting rocket-propelled outdoor furniture.
"I'm good at spotting patterns, right?"
See it for half a second like I did, and this becomes VERY easy to misinterpret.
"What is thing even supposed to be? Does it have a high-top skull?"
Eat a dick, Arthurian legend.
Might be hallucinogenic. Who the hell knows?
Just wait until the 2021910429th sex joke I make.
Yes, this actually happened.
"A Greek-sounding word and two letters. The gun of the ages!"
Because it was crafted from FUCKING DARK MATTER.
Perfect for evading electricity at the bottom of the ocean.
Rather than hand it over to Yukari, I hock it immediately.
Nope, nothing suspicious about that huge gap. No way a large door is going to spawn right there.
"I can hear you. Don't talk like I'm not here."
Good news: this returns. Bad news: track 1 is shit.
Crappy portrait coming in 3, 2,...
Wait, who decided to bring Professor Hojo along?
In reality, it's Ikutsuki, presumably forcing Yukari to fuck Koromaru.
Wait, Ergo? Isn't that the name of Aigis' armor? THE PLOT THICKENS.
"I'm not surprised that your wife left you; I'm more surprised that you got custody of Mitsuru."
"And Daddy let me come along because I've got his nuts in a vicegrip."
"Except for that comment about my testicles. Just ignore that."
"Did somebody tell him that we're still prototyping the Evokers?"
"They're NOT just my excuse for embezzling the fuck out of the Kirijo Group." "What was that?"
Aren't parents supposed to protect their kids?
"One of our employees is dead, and your daughter's dying. Bright skies and sunshine ahead!"
Turns out we'll never find out how he lost that eye.
"DAMN YOU, CHRISTIANITY!!!"
"Did something happen while we were watching that painful memory?"
"Maybe you should say that to Mitsuru so you don't sound like a pedophile."
Koromaru and Metis are having none of this.
"I'm a good counter, right?"
It's called "this thread".
"Why haven't they caught this Mamoru kid yet?"
No, Elizabeth. Don't. Remember how hard he slapped Margaret for this?
"That's because I don't know what that word means."
The same sword you get in Magicka, probably.
Fairies: more badass than you initially thought.
Let's see those raccoons eat out of the trash NOW!
Just don't do it on the rug.
Isn't that his regular ability? Or ALL his abilities?
Turns out it's possible to scan these bad boys.
The return of recursive Fusions.
How can it even dance when it doesn't have legs?
Finally, Aigis can become the interstellar cowboy of her dreams.
The very same one I've been beating this entire thread.
She awakened to her Persona in her sleep.
"Hailinel's reading this, isn't he?"
"Just skip to Koromaru or something. I'm not in the mood for mom jokes."
"What are you smoking and where can I get some?"
"Why did I think that would be a viable option, again?"
Yes. Give up. Give into the despair.
"Who put anchovies on this fucking pizza!?"
"Please, sign my ass! I'm a huge fan of yours!"
Because it was so easy for you when YOU saw your dead father.
Even though that's pretty much the entire point of The Answer so far.
"I mean, why couldn't it have been me? What's wrong with me, huh? Was I not good enough for him?"
His crime spree? His girlfriends? His various STIs? You have to be more specific about this, Yukari.
Not this, again. Do you know how hard it was to repair your broken Link?
"Why'd they have to recommend that I jump straight into this on the back of the box?"
Yes, Junpei. Piss off the robot lady. That's a solid plan.
"I'm a fine robot lady, damn it."
Mitsuru, maybe you should....
That's totally Aigis, Ken.
"Life is more than sunshine and dead fathers. There are bad times to it, too."
I think I can see her face through that mask. Not well, but I can.
Like there were any other options.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FUHATcsIuIw
You have access to the mall, guys. Go to the pharmacy and get her her damn medication.
"I've taken away her Evoker and put her on suicide watch. Just don't mention Brooklyn again."
What WERE his last words? Seems a big thing to overlook.
So far, only one of them is totally bitching.
Sell it to Maiko. She's into this kinda thing.
Always look for the OOPArts seal of quality.
"Why does YOUR character design look better than mine? Answer THAT, Sis!"
Because when I think "Narcissus", I think "inability to be charmed".
".....Well, this is all kinds of awkward."
"How can you have cold sweats AND be burning at the same time?"
The key to Norse languages: just add "nir" or "rir" to the end of every wordnir.
OK, which Digimon is this supposed to be? I know there's one out there who looks exactly like this.
"But enough about the blow-up doll I keep under my bed."
Final Fantasy VII? Metal Gear Solid 2? Neon Genesis Evangelion? I can probably go on.
For all you English majors out there.
I couldn't resist. Could you?
"Also, my Persona's good at this sort of thing."
WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THAT!?
"Did Dragon Ball just invade my Velvet Room?"
"I ripped them straight from its bloody corpse. It saw me coming, but could not act."
"Chernobog just gave you one of his kidney stones. Congrats!"
Is this an FF6 reference or just a strange translation?
Wouldn't it be an all-KNOWING eye, then?
She ripped off the limbs and head herself.
Are they from Double Amputella? They better be.
One ED away from being cool.
Curses. My secrets revealed.
"My speech therapist told me it helps to look directly at people when I'm talking to them."
Thunder Reign. Some can null and others feel the pain. Thunder Reign.
Why are you surprised? Did Samurai Shodown RPG finally get a translation?
"I'm not sure what he drank, either, but it sure did put him out."
"These eyes killed Yukari. How much better do you think you'll do?"
That's pretty much the description for all three of these things.
"I could've told you that because I AM RIGHT HERE, FUUKA."
By "soon", she means in twelve updates.
That was the best tasting goose any of them ever had.
Given current trends, I'm not so sure.
Setting in motion the entire plot of Persona 4.
"And for some reason, that makes me angry."
"Emotionally, it makes no sense. I'm not sure what it's doing spiritually or psychologically."
"Remember how I said the gas leak was fixed? Well..."
That doesn't really explain why it's underneath the dorm that's far away from the school, does it?
You don't want to know what Junpei does to people who forget decimals.
The door is the reason behind all, Akihiko.
Koromaru's? Are we gonna see Koromaru awaken to his Persona?
Notice where she's looking.
"Cry it out, bitch. I'll just look the other way."
"I'd recognize those cheeks anywhere."
"I'm caught between frames, and you're the only one who can save me!"
Damn it, Aigis. I thought we made progress on the air quotes.
"Curse this human brain of mine."
The twist: she was in Rez the entire time.
"How the hell should I know? Did you see the dates in the upper right?"
http://youtu.be/3GR5WV87tsk
"Is that why I'm flatter than Fuuka now?"
What possible connection could there be between dreams and waking up?
"I had a reason for giving you an Indian burn."
"Memorize this look. It will be your legacy."
THE RETURN OF REACTION SHOTS.
"What the hell's Junpei doing here?"
"Why....why would those papers lie to me? I just.....I...."
Oh, great. A sandstorm's kicking up.
Like deers in the headlights, they simply look on.
Metis: Master of Deduction.
So Brooklyn clearly has a heartless. Does that mean Gerax is running about with a black zipper coat?
"Sup, fools? You won't believe how awesome being dead is."
"Fortunately, I brought these cups with me. Everybody pee into one and we'll see who the dad is."
Nothing happens, because he lost Orpheus long ago.
Aigis v. Aigis....v. Mitsuru v. Yukari v. Brooklyn....v. Fuuka.
This wouldn't have been an issue if I could carry over my save from The Journey.
"I'm prepared for ANYTHING."
"That explains what happened to her after the Orpheus thing."
Because you don't know how.
Does he even have foresight?
"You're not the only wild card here, Aigis."
Surprisingly, an ice attack. Go figure.
Wait, how does that top one even work? Did she just string a bunch of glowsticks together?
Something I forgot last time: the birth of Metis. Or the Insect Princess. Can't be entirely sure.
"Why couldn't you have such cool spells when I use you?"
"Somebody mind explaining who the pale girl with the grating voice is?"
"No, Brooklyn, it DOESN'T look like a wiener."
This fight pleases Ryoji from beyond the beyond.
I imagine there's some symbolism here that I'm just too lazy to figure out.
You have accepted the death of a close friend. Please enjoy seeing his rotting corpse dissolve.
"No, this is WAY better than being dead."
I have a billion of these things, and I am going to use them.
Damn headphones got off lucky.
Didn't this exact same thing happen at the end of Persona 1?
How many screenshots have I taken where I wish I don't have to use them in the actual blog? Too many
Don't tell me Atlus had to create a brand new epilogue to address a major plot point.
Weren't they bottled up human emotions are some shit?
Define "they", because I have a million directions I could go with this.
Shin Megami Tensei: Shadow 3 FES.
When will Mamoru be brought to justice?
"So your minds created this infinite desert in your basement. You know, normal emotional trauma."
And I'm not the person to make it completely funny.
The lens flare on all their watches is going off like crazy.
"Can I kill somebody with it?"
Of course it is. Just look at how keyular it is.
We're giving Ocarina of Time a run for its money with all the Time suffixes.
"Why couldn't he do something productive instead of take a ton of pictures?"
Keep this in mind for later, when it backfires completely.
They call it Schrodinger's Multiverse Door.
Why do I feel like there's a game out there that employs this very concept?
He's shocked because he knows it means it'll make this thread that much longer.
OK, who forgot to let Koromaru out?
"Which is it?" "I, uh...I don't know."
"I bet Atlus is already working on 'The Show Me Your Work', huh?"
And then he survived for a couple months before keeling over.
He's like Jesus, except I thought that was supposed to be Takaya's role.
A phrase I don't once remember her saying.
"And get my ass kicked while Koromaru gets shit done."
"If you're gonna do that kind of thing, use tissues, like the rest of us."
I was originally gonna delete this picture, but in light of that last comment...
"Wait, who's doing it? Me or you?"
Wait, Miki dies? Is that why she didn't get her own route?
Yea, that entire I day I spent looking at Adventure Time GIFs on Tumblr was especially productive.
It's almost like it's a major theme in this game.
I have to admit, that WOULD be in character for Brooklyn.
Even though she's still alive and well (presumably)?
Because you were level 40, right?
This could apply to either Fuuka OR Junpei. YOU decide.
"I get it: the Arcana is the means by which all is revealed."
Post traumatic stress disorder.
"I just don't think the poor should be rounded up into camps, Koromaru."
OH....uh.....And she's looking right at me.
Which means Yukari should go down in one hit.
Because that's how magical time keys work.
The moment when Yukari needlessly extended the story by a couple of hours and became Bitch Supreme.
Yukari, do you understand what the word "projection" means?
Wasn't it the exact opposite, though?
Yep, Yukari's still a bitch.
"Like I have any idea, either."
I'm going to screenshot the eff out of the moment you do, Yukari. Just remember that.
Actually, you have many more choices.
"No, Shinji! You can't die on me again! DON'T GO!"
"Bonds of people is the weakest power."
I think that's your answer.
"I am perfectly fine with murdering you, Aigis."
CONSIDER WHO THIS IS COMING FROM.
Now I want him to lose just to see him apply this to himself.
The face we'll never see from this angle.
"How was that, Aigis? Did I use them right?"
When did we enter Alice in Wonderland? Where's the husky Gryphon?
"It'll help, though. Keep that in mind."
Right after she threatened to kill them.
"I was just doing nothing and then my Persona just appeared out of nowhere."
"Actively encouraging friends to kill each other in a doomed attempt to sate their petty emotions."
"Don't tell me we've just entered FF13-2."
"Don't tell me we've just ent-" "-ered FF13-2. Yea, I said the same thing."
She just saw her own stats from LONG ago.
But Metis asked you directly.
"Instead, I'll just turn my back to it all and let you all die here. That's the smart thing to do."
Say the two characters I absolutely never used.
He goes down in one round.
My money's on the robo-girl with a fucking gun for a hand.
"If you do, other way around."
It's satisfying me quite a bit.
HOW MUCH LEVEL GRINDING DID HE DO!?
Funny. I said the same thing to your next attack.
Staring down the barrel may be badass, but it isn't enough to scratch all this.
Of all the places to fall asleep.
Chocolina can't be too far behind.
Just look at him, charging his mind.
Stop it with the excuses, dude. Just accept that you're going to lose. Horribly.
"I still have a chance, right?"
That's right. Bow in worship to your new gods.
Remember how Persona 4 basically nerfed this?
We rip through him like toilet paper.
Persona, Final Fantasy, Kingdom Hearts, Fragile Dreams, Katawa Shoujo, Radiant Historia, Terranigma
"Why are you yelling at me? It's Yukari's fault. Remember, Sis?"
".....What did you just say?"
What to use in the fight against the dog who uses fire spells and the guy who uses fire spells?
"Why do I even have a key? What am I supposed to do with it?"
Who knew Ken and Akihiko's bodies would burn so well?
"Put one right in my heart. Make it quick."
Miracles do no exist in this world; only victories.
Who's he talking to? All three of them could apply.
"I sure am chipper about this fight to the death."
Somehow. I KNOW I never bothered with him.
I keep telling you: blame Yukari for all this.
Fuuka, I think your data's wrong. Really, REALLY wrong.
"I'm tired of being a good boy. Somebody has to die."
No, I'd say she's the only one.
Again? Did she actually shoot off one of your testicles?
That's what characters say right as they're about to die.
It's like the rat poison you put in his dog food had NO effect!
"And cold. Still pissed, though."
The electrodes ARE working!
And so goes Koromaru. Only two more left from here.
"The short-haired brunette tore us apart in less than a second."
I've read the FAQs and no, it isn't.
The message of the game: future future future future.
"What happened to me being immortal last year?"
Does this mean I get to play as Metis from here on out? Hell yes?
A month ago? That's...not too significant in terms of the story. Brooklyn died on March 5, remember?
"There was also this Jafar looking motherfucker talking about dragons falling or something?"
"You mean life, right? Because otherwise, that would imply that I'm an immortal demi-god."
"It's almost like you're the embodiment of my insecurities regarding my failure to protect Brooklyn.
"Akihiko-san was right: there ARE little pink monsters running about."
Wow, you should see a psychiatrist about that.
Just in case that "it's almost like" screenshot wasn't clear enough.
So what did she decide on?
But it's not balls-bustingly hard, either.
"And if there's one thing this game's taught me, it's that humans reproduce by being alone together.
A guttural shriek resembling the dying cry of an antelope.
"Why do you think I asked for all those guns from you, Aigis?"
Two healers on the same team? Should be an easy fight.
Maybe because it's been a couple of updates since we last saw you?
"You've done so much to undo every single one of those."
Except the hurting. That part sucks.
"Setting all of us against each other based on my own selfish emotions sure is fun."
"Makes ripping your guts out that much more enjoyable."
She goes down in a single round.
"And none of the blame will b-wait, I think I've got your script, Mitsuru."
Wait, why's Aigis' armor contrasting so much against the background?
There's still another battle after this, unsurprisingly.
"Damn it, Brooklyn! You said there was popcorn in this thing!"
She was level 74 before all this. Hooray for reasonable level jumps!
"If I don't see an ounce of chub..."
Only Yukari, because karma is a bitch. (Much like Yukari.)
I guess that Blazing Flame I gave her isn't worth shit.
She says in the most dudebro accent.
"Fuck my characterization! Mitsuru's sexy moves trump all!"
Shit. I guess she wasn't kidding. Last time I underestimate their sudden Megidolaon combo.
"I honestly didn't expect my one ally to FUCKING BLUDGEON ME TO DEATH."
Let her stew in her own....stewing fluids, presumably.
Is that why she started battle with a status-changing move rather than, you know, an attack?
Good. That means your nerve endings no longer function.
"You're the only one of us actually equipped with armor, after all."
Proof that I died AGAIN to these two. Also, a cool looking Persona.
The ultimate in recursive fusions.
That look. That fucking look.
Notice how she doesn't say anything about winning.
"Man, was it a bad idea to tell her my weaknesses."
Wait, isn't that the World card Brooklyn got at the end of The Journey?
"I think. It's hard to tell under all this magical light."
Aw. No dead everybody :(.
"Maybe I should've aimed at you instead of the ground."
She says in the most sinister goddamn tone imaginable.
Wasn't this fight supposed to prove whose will was strongest, though?
Wow, even Fuuka's terrified by the twatty twister Yukari's giving Aigis.
"You guys got any clue how I should handle this?"
Kind of a moot point now that the Fall's well in the past, right?
"That I sawed off his corpse when you guys left the room."
"Is it also why you wanted to take the door to the past instead of the door to the present?"
"Looks just like what Junpei gave me."
FUCK YOUR EMOTIONAL BONDING.
"Even when you cause things to be their worst?"
"That slap to the face really changed my perspective on life."
Oh, shit. Takeharu's a worse dad than I gave him credit for.
Hey, look at that: a genuinely heartwarming moment.
Born? You mean you were spawned out of some titanium vagina somewhere?
They're as confused as I am.
"I'm not quite sure how I'll accomplish that."
Take note of where they're looking.
"I want an emotional moment, too!"
Actually, I think things would be just as awkward if she did just this.
"We must dig a hole to the center of the Earth and live as the golem men do."
The entire reason for this 30 hour expansion pack.
Even though that's not technically possible.
"They're a million million worlds. All different and all similar."
"I think he wrote more than we spoke."
I love how their surprise is all in perfectly sync.
"And rip its goddamn lungs out."
"Turns out oi'm an Awstrailian cowboy, mayte!"
You mean the final boss is essentially Nyx again?
"Quantam mechanics. The musical stylings of John C. Reilley. How to cook a hot dog in under a minute
No fancy name or anything. Just "final door".
Turns out his special item is just his shed skin. Great.
A giant black door in the middle of the desert?
"Yes. It would've driven me to insomnia if the loss of a dear friend hadn't already done that."
Elizabeth the Nihilist....Wait, I think I've used that caption before.
Oh, yea, I forgot to detail this feature in The Journey. It's essentially a roulette.
WHAT THE HELL IS MARALAGIDYNE?!
No, and that's the way I like it.
He says with cunnilingus tongue.
"Seriously, look at me. I'm a giant effing dick. What part of me should ever be allowed near a woman
Atlus: a company so green that it has no qualms recycling endings.
"Finally! None of you are safe!"
"Where is Nyx? Can YOU help us, home audience?"
"Guess where this has been, infinite cosmos."
Another angle, for posterity's sake.
Those eyes are fucking moving, by the way. Did I mention that?
Actually, I think it's just a statue of him.
"Learned that the hard way."
I don't think you'd want to know about his regrets. A lot of them involve knives.
Space Robot Girl Metis? If this isn't an anime, it will be soon.
What's there to think about? Absolute destruction isn't a hard concept to grasp.
"Probably shouldn't have attacked it like you did."
"The lions will be just fine for the circus, Mr. Elephant."
OH SHIT! FUCKING SHADOW TERMINATOR!
God, Fuuka, fucking get it together.
What? I thought it was an alright joke.
Oh, that. Yea, it does look kinda dumb without its skin.
"I'm comin' for ya, Mitsuru!"
The power of arson! Also, the Wild Card.
"My vagina's essentially a windsock now."
"Knowing he's gonna die before puberty....god, that just turns me all kinds of on."
"We" refers to all the characters I didn't use.
Like a horror show Catdog.
BEHOLD THE POWER OF MARA!
I SAID BEHOLD IT, MOTHERFUCKERS!
It's like he's surprised that he only nulls the insta-kill stuff.
For dry, red eyes, go read the Nyx fight, because I believe I made that joke there, too.
Sadly, no all-out attack.
And this is what gave me such a hard fucking time with Erebus.
UNDERSTATEMENT OF THE FUCKING.....PAGE.
"I can feel it all throughout my body. I AM THE POWER OF A THOUSAND SUNS!"
Eternal Sands always tell the funniest jokes.
I still don't beat it :(.
That's how much an All Out Attack does on this thing. Sadly, not enough.
Kinda wish I was facing off against Medusa instead of Erebus.
Mitsuru, truly you are the King of England.
The moment I start winning for a not-change.
You THINK? May want to be more certain in a moment like this, Fuuka.
"Look, we're both tired. How about we reschedule this fight for tomorrow, around 3 o'clock?"
"OH GOD! YOU'D THINK I'D HAVE LEARNED BY NOW!"
Watch as this dumbass reflects its own attacks back at itself.
Let it be known that I beat this game with a giant, throbbing cock. Also, I used Mara.
"Guess who just blew 30 hours on the same damn game?"
"And I can't even pass as human. What's YOUR excuse?"
"Sorry for needlessly extending the game a couple of hours."
"Things I wouldn't even say to my MOM."
You could have talked things out rationally with everybody else. Did that ever cross your mind?
Like a guardian angel who stabs people's throats.
By beating up a two headed skeleton dog thing?
April Fool's! It's still March 31st.
She then utters a horrible hissing noise, looking for confirmation among the terrified faces.
"What a disappointingly simple answer."
Philemon? What's your crazy ass doing here?
"It has your eyes. Your empty, soulless eyes."
Just how wild is the wild card?
"The homeless guy's nose isn't supposed to be THAT huge!"
There is every need to worry.
"Kind of awkward when you have to introduce yourself at the same time."
The world is so very, very fucked.
But what about when Mitsuru awakened to her Persona in Tartarus? Or Fuuka in Tartarus? Or etc.?
I got no answer. I'm no Metis.
"Space, elevators, deserts, they're all the same thing, really."
Of course not, Aigis. It's hard to protect somebody when they're dead.
"Now, at the butt end of the game?"
FUCKING CALLED THAT SHIT.
That explains the clingy personality. Not so much the butterfly motif.
"Too bad you didn't do shit to help alleviate it."
"One, two, three, four, I declare a thumb war."
Good to see you inherited your sister's quoting tendencies.
And like all JRPG characters, her death involves magical dissolves.
I think Igor's enjoying naked Aigis a bit too much.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zUxsVVU2PyA
Of course not. You're far too interesting a character for Atlus to kill off.
"There's no way this feature can end...right?"
"Oh, the laughs I would aim at her face."
Maybe "splendidly" isn't the right word. More like "averagely", if that's even a word.
"We're going to go over this again: what do the numbers mean, Aigis? What is Kravchenko planning?"
Yea, can't tell that this is a zoomed in set of pixels or anything, Atlus. Did a nice job of that.
THE Heart is apparently Metis.
Since when was Metis a devout Christian?
"Why do my legs feel like Jello?"
"Quick! While she's still out!"
"That just leaves one wrecked table and a mysterious basement underneath the dorm."
Time to start slapping fish on everyone's backs.
"God, stop lying there, you lazy bitch!"
The end of the game is too early for anything definitive.
Now we know why they're always wearing those bands.
"These graphics suck. How can 3D models look like they were made in Paint?"
"And Aigis knew?" "..........Yea, sure."
He says in MITSURU'S voice. No, seriously, look: http://youtu.be/pUgcviDkUng?t=5m13s
"It's worse than I thought: Windows 8."
"The lumbar support on this is AMAZING."
"We tried checking your pulse, but you being a robot, that didn't work out too well."
Move over, Mitsuru. Seems there's a new queen of the random quote.
"You, however, are so very fucked."
"Got closer than we ever thought possible......"
I guess? Brooklyn's still dead and Aigis is at the same risk, but yea, this is relatively happy.
"Now could somebody tell me what time it is?"
"Atlus has informed me of something called Persona 4 Arena."
"And we'll need guns for it. That's how psychology works."
"Because I'm only giving you until the count of three."
Must....Photoshop....concept....
From beyond the void, Junpei's idiocy can be heard.
Of course not. Science demands it.
"There are things that must be bent."
She then faceplants into the table, given that she essentially has hooves instead of feet.
"I think we could really bond over that time I tried to kill you and then tried to kill you again."
Holy shit, Yukari. Did your hair grow an extra foot between screenshots?
Can't have a Persona 3 ending without dramatic jumps.
"Roger, roger, this is Klondike 227, are you coming in? Repeat, Klondike 227, are you coming in?"
Now who could plan for Koromaru looking like fucking this?
Yep, Aigis still looks pretty badass.
Why freeze on the E peeling away? Who the hell knows?
"Introducing our newest dancer. She's got the looks, but does she have the goods?"
All this time, it only wanted a high five.
Yep, that's the best way to show off Psyche.
Wait, Brooklyn? The hell's he doing here?
And a bonus picture of a Persona I never used, because a 1 picture update would be awkward as hell.
"Wait, how's a massage supposed to wake her up, again?"
"Well, her dad DID work at your lab, Aigis."
"But didn't we already...?"
That's got to be the LEAST of your problems, Chihiro.
"Remember when you'd cower in fear when somebody tried to use the microwave? Those were the days."
He knows we've been wearing a wire.
"Why did I run here, again?"
"I didn't know they'd twist THAT far."
"Maybe today wasn't the day to make a bin Laden joke."
"But then I discovered Mister Fister."
Practice here meaning "staring at Kazushi in cold judgment".
"Who puts cellophane AND a camera in a toilet?"
Bender Bending Rodriguez would be proud.
Why are you asking HIM? He's not the one who's going to take issue with that.
The Human Centipede, minus (most of) the human.
"You're the only person to call my disease a good thing."
If Martha Stewart had no qualms shooting a person.
It doesn't so much bite him in the ass as it does burrow deep within it.
"She's just not as open with her body as Fuuka is."
"You spent the rest of the day watching Miyahara tripping all kinds of balls."
I don't know, Aigis. Think you can handle Chihiro?
"I mean, how many people have lost their fathers?" "You, for one."
"Do you know what it's like being stuck as an eight year old for ten godddamn years?"
It's like I have every character's racist moments recorded for all time.
I have the dirtiest joke imagineable for this screenshot. Now you know why I didn't post it.
"Because Chidori graduated back in 94."
"None of them are pleasant. Imagine that."
One of many aliases for Brooklyn Rage.
"I just miss the way he'd ignore me for months on end and then tell me to stop talking about my mom.
I know who the "his" is; just not the "she".
"I think he knew. Why else would somebody smoke a carton a day?"
Yep, that's totally Ai-chan you're looking at.
I've seen freakier. In this very restaurant, even.
"Well, then, I guess you couldn't keep it, Yuki. How's that feel? Huh?"
He was going to kill them, anyway, Nozomi. No need to get so nervous.
"And I'm telling YOU that it's NOT the same when you're doing it with a guy!"
Summary of my life in one screenshot.
"Since when were first person dungeons ever a good idea?"
"And kick it straight in the balls."
I should have heeded her warning. I shouldn't have hung out with Mamoru.
"I forgot how soft your cheeks were."
I'm sure this hasn't stopped all sorts of nasty Internet fan art. (Then again, can anything?)
Nope, no way THAT could go horribly wrong.
YOU never got to see her in her maid outfit.
"If I woke up looking at that, I'd just run toward the nearest living thing and kill it."
"Then we're going to need a urine sample from you."
Meaning he's gonna make Junpei trip all the way there.
"Why were you asking me about yourself, again?"
The marriage of phone sex and premature ejaculation.
"It's only a matter of time until she realizes that I replaced her blood clotting pills."
Of course he is. He doesn't want to have sex with them.
I think Junpei finally caught on.
She's referring to that seat.
"Why couldn't he have stuck his finger in MY dirty hole?"
Jin: Test Tube Baby of the Future.
"Warp back down to the first floor or something before we fight. Go ahead. I'll wait."
"In the most flagrantly illegal way possible."
"(Maybe I shouldn't have taken that stool softener last year.)"
"It goes in the TOILET, Junpei."
